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Nice Guy Syndrome and Misandry

Quagmire

Imaginary talking monkey
Staff member
Premium Member
After reading through aaaawwwlll the speculations and assertions on what women want, I want to SCREEEAAAM!!!

You know what? Everyone is different.

That's not true at all. I'm sure there's at least one person somewhere who's the same.

There is no "what women want",

"The great question that has never been answered, and which I have not yet been able to answer, despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul, is "What does a woman want?""
---Sigmund Freud

Guess he didn't know about chocolate.
 

Songbird

She rules her life like a bird in flight
That's not true at all. I'm sure there's at least one person somewhere who's the same.

"The great question that has never been answered, and which I have not yet been able to answer, despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul, is "What does a woman want?""
---Sigmund Freud

Guess he didn't know about chocolate.

Hii!! Say hi to youknowwho too!
 

blackout

Violet.
It takes two whole (entire/complete) people
to make one whole (entire/complete) relationship.

All puns entirely and completely intended.
 

blackout

Violet.
ok, so how many hot chicks do you see dating the skinny guy who sweeps the floor at the diner?


This is like providing two puzzle pieces in a 1,000 piece puzzle.

Our lives are WHOLE stories.
Relationships are intertwined stories.

It takes many many connected pieces
to begin to see, and make sense of the whole picture.
 
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Sunstone

De Diablo Del Fora
Premium Member
I don't have time to discuss it tonight, but at some point I want to talk about how the thrill of the hunt can be mistaken for liking a jerk. It's not a male-only prowess. Chasing someone who seems unattainable is an equal-opportunity challenge many people enjoy.

When you've time, I want to hear your thoughts about that, please.
 

Sunstone

De Diablo Del Fora
Premium Member
You know what? Everyone is different. There is no "what women want"...

Maybe it's just me, but I find arguments that all women -- or all people -- are alike to be every bit as informed and intelligent as arguing that everyone likes the very same foods.

Most people wouldn't argue that everyone -- or every woman -- on earth likes tomato ketchup. They wouldn't even argue that among those women who like tomato ketchup, everyone likes tomato ketchup equally. But it seems some of the same people are thoughtless, foolish, or naive enough to not only argue that all women like the same traits in men, but to even argue that they all like the same traits equally well.

I think part of the problem, here, is the notion that there is a human ideal. That is, the notion there is a perfect human, and that everyone who is not like that perfect human has fallen short of an ideal. You see that notion of a perfect or ideal human expressed in all sorts of ways -- in both subtle ways and not so subtle ways. In this thread, it seems to be expressed somewhat subtly in the notion that all women are alike in their mate preferences.

The trouble is, there is no human ideal. It's a fantasy, a myth, for which there is no support in biology or the other sciences. The facts all point to human diversity as the norm -- not to an ideal as the norm. You see diversity in everything human. Even in something as mundane as our noses, you see a huge diversity of shapes -- let alone the diversity in something as complex as our mating preferences.

The bottom line is: No informed and intelligent person should ever simply assume that we are all alike in any particular trait. If one must assume, then the assumption should be that we are diverse in any particular trait. You are far more likely to be correct in making the latter assumption than in making the former.
 

Songbird

She rules her life like a bird in flight
When you've time, I want to hear your thoughts about that, please.

I lost my train of thought about this issue. But basically, the idea of taming the bad boy is appealing. Having such powerful appeal that you can turn the soulless demon into a kind person (Twilight), or morphing the jerk into a gentle dude inspired sheerly by loving you (Beauty and the Beast and countless other stories) is a classic theme.

The thrill of the hunt, baby. Can I get what's seemingly unattainable?

And to answer the inevitable rebuttals that there are other motivations, well - duh.
 

Penumbra

Veteran Member
Premium Member
Domination seems to mean different things to different people, or in different circumstances.
 

Debater Slayer

Vipassana
Staff member
Premium Member
"Those women call me ugly, until they find out how much money I make.

... then they call me ugly and poor. I hate them women!"
 
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