It's all pointless.

[DallasApple]

No, it's not any wonder. Like I said, I'm reluctant even to suggest it. But what's the alternative?

I really don't think these girls are setting out deliberately to "rip your heart out." I think you're scaring them, and this feeling you have that they were sent from the evil one is really not healthy. You've got to get past that rage, and I don't know how to help you. You've got to find somebody who does.

I agree..

Believign that there is some sort of "conspiracy" against you from a whole gender and not only that some surounding people help out with that is not good.

Alos your whole obessesion with 'finding a girl" ..when it seems you need to find your self instead.

You arent "comprehending" when told your behavior is for istance "stalking".YOU ARGUE THAT ITS NOT.YOu go further and list stalking as a loving action of affection..

What you need to understand is its YOUR responsibility to learn how to fit in.(*% of the population isnt going to suddenly get educated on Aspergers and further put up with the quirks invloved.

YOu have to conform ..the world will NOT conform around you.

Love

Dallas

 

[T-Dawg]

Believign that there is some sort of "conspiracy" against you from a whole gender and not only that some surounding people help out with that is not good.

I never said it came from the entire gender. Just those two girls.

YOu have to conform ..the world will NOT conform around you.

Not only is that impossible, conforming to the Normal goes against just about every moral I have.

 

[DallasApple]

I never said it came from the entire gender. Just those two girls.Not only is that impossible, conforming to the Normal goes against just about every moral I have.

O.K.

Love

Dallas

 

[Smoke]

I already know that it's going to be a girl, not a "professional." The only way to change my attitude towards girls I like is to be a girl I like and set an example.

If you find such a girl, she will hold your mental and emotional health in her hands, and because of that you're likely to be possessive and controlling and ultimately drive her away. And then where will you be?

You really have to find a way to be happy in your own skin first.

I'm the last one to tell you you have to conform or try to be something you're not. Eventually you'll find somebody who loves you as you are, and when you find her, you'll want to be somebody with something to offer, not an emotional fix-up project.

 

[Alceste]

Except that she didn't say that, she just said she didn't date.

Yeah, and if she said that to any other guy (except a drunk or an idiot, as I mentioned before), he would have understood that it meant she didn't want to date HIM.

That's what I'm telling you - if she says anything that sounds remotely like it COULD mean she isn't interested in dating, no matter what the reason or how it is phrased, you should take it to mean she isn't interested in dating you. Not now, not ever.

You might not like it, and you might think it's a stupid way to do it, but that's how it's done. Not many women will be brutally blunt and honest to a guy who likes them when they're not interested. There are repercussions for being brutally blunt. Honest female teenagers quickly become known as b*tches, teases, and if the guy they were honest with is particularly mean-spirited, sluts. (Or in your case, minions of the devil.)

I'm a blunt and honest woman, and let me tell you, it takes a lot more backbone than most people (men too) have to tell somebody in no uncertain terms that their attention is not wanted. People tend to flip out, yell, get abusive... you're lucky if all they do is sulk.

What was stopping her from telling the truth?

She told you the truth. As far as you're concerned, she doesn't date. It's not her fault you kept looking for a way in. She didn't mislead you, you misled yourself. Wishful thinking is a pain in the butt, isn't it?

Knowing you, you probably aren't intentionally making fun of me, but that's what it's feeling like. How did you come to this interpretation?

No, I'm not making fun of you, I'm trying to help you. I'm coming to my interpretation based on everything you've said about the behavior of the girls you've liked. I've also had to reject a lot of guys, and I've been rejected by a lot of guys, so trust me: I know how it's done. Plus, I know a guy with Aspergers really well (my ex). You remind me a little of him, and I know he had huge trouble picking up signals, body language, etc. He always thought I was mad when I was feeling great, or thought I was happy when I was mad. So, maybe you're thinking everything's great and fine and you're getting encouragement when in fact she's giving you the opposite signals.

Just out of curiosity, have you ever read a book on body language?

 

[T-Dawg]

If you find such a girl, she will hold your mental and emotional health in her hands, and because of that you're likely to be possessive and controlling and ultimately drive her away. And then where will you be?

How does having my mental and emotional health in her hands correlate to me being possessive and controlling? Wouldn't having my mental and emotional health in her hands make me the submissive pet and her the dominant figure in the relationship?

That's what I'm telling you - if she says anything that sounds remotely like it COULD mean she isn't interested in dating, no matter what the reason or how it is phrased, you should take it to mean she isn't interested in dating you. Not now, not ever.

Ok, that makes more sense. God, I hate societal norms, how the heck did they manage to evolve into us...

Not many women will be brutally blunt and honest to a guy who likes them when they're not interested. There are repercussions for being brutally blunt. Honest female teenagers quickly become known as b*tches, teases, and if the guy they were honest with is particularly mean-spirited, sluts.

Honesty makes you a ****? How the hell did THAT idea come about?!?

She told you the truth.

No, she told me that she didn't want to date until later, when in reality she didn't want to date ever (or at least not date me ever).

Wishful thinking is a pain in the butt, isn't it?

Yes .

No, I'm not making fun of you, I'm trying to help you.

K, that's what I thought...

Just out of curiosity, have you ever read a book on body language?

No .

 

[Alceste]

Ok, that makes more sense. God, I hate societal norms, how the heck did they manage to evolve into us...Honesty makes you a ****?

Nah, it's more like people get mean when they get hurt, so most people try to go to great lengths to avoid hurting other people's feelings.

I once dated this guy who told me quite honestly he didn't want a serious relationship because he'd just gotten out of a relationship with a psycho that went for years, and he wanted to enjoy being single for a while. That sounds pretty straightforward, doesn't it? Somehow, though, I managed to make it into a huge melodrama, full of mixed signals - all because I wanted him to be my boyfriend and simply couldn't believe it wasn't going to happen. Needless to say, I acted so neurotic, jealous and crazy (despite the fact I thought I was acting very cool) he didn't want much to do with me. I think you will look back one day and feel the same about this time in your life - you will be able to understand why things didn't work out without bringing Satan into it. At least I hope so!

Anyway, maybe reading a book on body language would help. If you learned a general sense of what certain movements mean, you'd be better at figuring out whether a girl is feeling interested, or feeling uncomfortable. There's a lot of nonsense out there though, written for control freaks. I'll see if I can find something decent.

 

[whereismynotecard]

I realized something as I sat by the girl I liked, during the talent show (or whatever the event was supposed to be). While they were playing this song, YouTube - A Broken Hallelujah (House: House/Stacy) and when we got to the part that went something like "I used to live alone before I knew you... love is not a victory much, it's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah..."
And then I thought - "Wait a minute - even if everything goes great and this person someone ends up liking me, it's still not going to be great. I'm going to be giving away my entire life just so I can be with a girl. Think, man, THINK! You hardly even know this person! All you know about her is that she's beautiful and she gave you a friendly hug a couple weeks ago! For all you know, she might be Republican or something!"

I talked about some of this with one of my friends (who also happens to be her boyfriend), and I found out that it was called physical attraction (we got into another conversation but it's not relevant). And I thought - "Physical attraction? Seriously? Am I really that stupid? Why do I insist on liking girls that I don't know at all and whom I know don't like me back? Why?"

And later I remembering thinking something along the lines of "What am I wanting? Sex? Why am I tormenting myself over sex? I don't even like sex. Even if it's as great as it's hyped up to be, it's just another fun thing to do that only lasts about 5 seconds at most. Why do my hormones insist on basing my actions off of the desire for sex? Wait a minute... why do I insist on basing my actions off of... anything? What's the point of life? So I can get a good job, become rich, become a billionare, take over the world... THEN WHAT?!? What's the point? It will all come to pass. Just like Solomon learned and passed on through Ecclesiastes. What am I living for?"


Are these thoughts normal?

First of all, I think sex lasts longer than 5 seconds for most people.

And secondly, of course there is no point to life. So you just have to try to enjoy it the best you can. One day we will all be dead, and it won't matter if we had hot girlfriends or sexy boyfriends or had a great job and a lot of money. It won't matter if we were beautiful or ugly or anything. We'll all be dead. Instead of being upset over that, however, you can just try to have fun before you're dead.

One day I'll be dead, but I'm not yet. And I enjoy watching television, so I'm going to do it. And I want to travel all over the world, so I'm going to. I'll certainly be dead one day, but that's no reason not to have fun now.

 

[T-Dawg]

Nah, it's more like people get mean when they get hurt, so most people try to go to great lengths to avoid hurting other people's feelings.

So to avoid hurting my feelings, they lie to me and avoid telling me the real situation so I can find out later after I'm even more infatuated with them and they're even more angry? I've already discussed this concept with my therapist, she agrees that it's rather stupid of girls to do stuff like that...

Anyway, maybe reading a book on body language would help. If you learned a general sense of what certain movements mean, you'd be better at figuring out whether a girl is feeling interested, or feeling uncomfortable.

But doesn't that mean I have to stare at them, trying to analyze their body movements? One female complained of me "looking at her" too much (which is odd, since she specifically made the complaint after I had intentionally put effort into looking at her less often...), wouldn't trying to figure out their body movements creep them out even more?

 

[Alceste]

So to avoid hurting my feelings, they lie to me and avoid telling me the real situation so I can find out later after I'm even more infatuated with them and they're even more angry? I've already discussed this concept with my therapist, she agrees that it's rather stupid of girls to do stuff like that...

Yeah, stupid as it may be, that's how it's done.

But doesn't that mean I have to stare at them, trying to analyze their body movements? One female complained of me "looking at her" too much (which is odd, since she specifically made the complaint after I had intentionally put effort into looking at her less often...), wouldn't trying to figure out their body movements creep them out even more?

I honestly don't know. Maybe it would mean that once you see a woman with her arms crossed in front of her while she's talking to you (unless it's freezing cold), you'd just move on and leave her alone because you'd know she isn't interested. Then she'd have nothing to complain about.

 

[Runewolf1973]

The best advice I can give you is just to stand up for yourself and don't let people walk all over you. Show some confidence in yourself because girls are really attracted to confident men. Yes...MEN. Not snivelling saps that act shy, nervous or scared. Don't worry about what other people (girls) think so much, just be confident with yourself. Lack of confidence and acting too needy are major turn-offs I have found. You must take control of your own thoughts as well. If a negative thought comes into your mind, be strong and know that you are better than that. When you first go out with a girl, just try to be confident and be yourself. If you act too needy, the girls will generally not like it. Sometimes you need to play the game a little too. Play a little hard to get yourself, not so desperate. Girls usually seem to go for a challenge. Remember, there are a lot of other girls out there. They (most girls I have known anyways) also seem to go more for guys that are good talkers and can hold a conversation. I find that if you don't talk much, they tend to get bored easily. But don't talk too much, leave a bit of mystery about yourself. They don't want to know your whole life's story in five minutes either. The more desperate and needy you come across, the more you will find girls will go the other way. Anyways, you have the choice to either take my advice or not. I have had a bit of experince on the playing field. I know it doesn't seem right for it to be like a game, but sometimes, that is exactly what it is. Either you are willing to play along, or you will find yourself to be stuck on the bench.

 

[monta]

So to avoid hurting my feelings, they lie to me and avoid telling me the real situation so I can find out later after I'm even more infatuated with them and they're even more angry? I've already discussed this concept with my therapist, she agrees that it's rather stupid of girls to do stuff like that...But doesn't that mean I have to stare at them, trying to analyze their body movements? One female complained of me "looking at her" too much (which is odd, since she specifically made the complaint after I had intentionally put effort into looking at her less often...), wouldn't trying to figure out their body movements creep them out even more?

TAL think of it this way, imagine you speak only English and everyone around you speaks only French, does it make more sense for everyone else to learn to communicate in English or for you to try and communicate in French, do you think they will go along with it and learn English because you don't speak French, it doesn't mean you will ever think in French but in order to interact you need a few words at the very least.

Body language and social customs and etiquette are the foreign language you don't seem to have,if you don't use that allegedly big brain of yours to process the information you have been given over and over again you will doom yourself to failure. It will be no ones fault but your own.

 

[zenzero]

Friend The AmazingLoser,

It's all pointless.

Are these thoughts normal?

All thoughts are normal as whatever happens, happens normally even thoughts of all kinds.

Life itself appears pointless and in a way it is as it has no goals and this is just a play which is why in sanatan dharma it is called maya or illusion, because it is only in thoughts. Reality is only when all thoughts arise no more like a STILL lake without ripples and the refection of the moon becomes clear. They are all there at all times but thoughts like ripples never allows the clear refection.
SIMPLY watch the thoughts coming and going and over time there will be a gap between one thought and another when TRUTH will reflect clearly. [This is the only POINT]

Love & rgds

 

[Scarlett Wampus]

I've known about the risperdal for a long time, it just occured to me then that it might have done something. I've the voice ever since I stopped talking to my first crush (actually, I got them before I made the decision to run away from her, and what they said scared me enough to stop attempting a relationship with her. In fact, because of what the voices told me, I sincerely believed that she wanted to kill me throughout high school). Another voice is the personification of my stalker personality and hormone drive, and tries to tell me what to do when I'm around certain girls.

No, it's not audible.

Personally I wasn't thinking that the Risperidone had done anything in particular, I was trying to work out whether someone had given you Risperidone out of a mistaken diagnosis of schizophrenia. I've since found out it's also prescribed as an aid for aspergers which explains to me why someone would've given you that.

Having read through this thread again I think your original question of whether your thoughts are normal has the answer yes, they are. That doesn't mean they'll be correct but they're definitely normal. Social communication is where the difficulty is, other people understanding you and you understand them.

If there isn't a supernatural force controlling them, then it means they did it off their own free will. And that's even worse. Besides, The Evil needs to exist. I would have no other explanation as to why God never talks to me (he's too busy holding The Evil at bay). I would have no explanation as to why people like Rush Limbaugh exist (Limbaugh was sent by The Evil to act as a demagogue for conservatives and to drive all the intellectuals towards the Democrat party. Both sides are owned by The Evil.). I would have no explanation as to why people do incredibly stupid things and work against their own benefit. I would have no explanation as to why most people choose capitalism over communism.

There are alternative explanations. Its possible to explain behaviour through the behavioural sciences for instance. Evil does not need to exist as an explanation for what people do when examining it through the knowledge of behavioural sciences. Also you may notice that there is very little agreement about what evil is and when its being done whereas the behavioural sciences offer explanation that can be verified by anyone through reason and examination of evidence.

 

[MSizer]

Of course not. 1.) I don't want to be put on anti-depressant medication that will f*** up my mind and deprive me of wisdom (which all mind altering drugs inherently do, for that is their purpose - change a person's brain chemicals, because obviously if you're thinking certain things, you're insane, right? Bah!). You have to understand that where I live, being depressed is the same thing as being suicidal, as far as the people in charge are concerned. And wanting to die is somehow a crime where I live.

Hey dood, I don't know if you're speaking sarcasticaly about the meds, or whether you think it's true, but I happen to know that the above statement is misleading about psych drugs. For example, you're talking about depression. I know that here in canada about 10% of the population experience clinical depression in their lives, and about 1% have chronic depression. The most common drugs for depression are called SNRIs, which do nothing more than allow your brain to function more like an "average" brain by giving it the ability to use it's own brain chemicals better. In essence, depressed people generally don't make good use of the two neurotransmitters seratonin and norepinephrine. Neurotransmitters are chemicals which are released to allow communication between neurons. In depressed people, those two particular neurotransmitters are re-absorbed too quickly (so your brain doesn't have a chance to "do what it is supposed to do"). The SNRI meds simply slow the re-absorption of those neurotransmitters so that your brain works more like a "normal" one. There is no mystical unknown that goes on with those meds. They're clinically tested, and yes, there are variables from patient to patient, but it's not reasonable to write off the drugs without knowing anything about them.

If more people were educated about medicine and neurology, there wouldn't be such ridiculous and harmful stigmas attached to illnesses.

 

[Alceste]

There are alternative explanations. Its possible to explain behaviour through the behavioural sciences for instance. Evil does not need to exist as an explanation for what people do when examining it through the knowledge of behavioural sciences. Also you may notice that there is very little agreement about what evil is and when its being done whereas the behavioural sciences offer explanation that can be verified by anyone through reason and examination of evidence.

I like my dad's approach to the subject of evil: "Never presume malice where incompetence will suffice".

 

[T-Dawg]

I like my dad's approach to the subject of evil: "Never presume malice where incompetence will suffice".

Incompetence doesn't explain the Bush Regime or Rush Limbaugh. People aren't that stupid in real life. NO ONE sincerely believed that we were actually fighting terrorists in Iraq, they just pretended to be that stupid because they wanted a fundamentalist to have power.

I say "Never assume incompetence where there could be evil."

 

[MSizer]

Incompetence doesn't explain the Bush Regime or Rush Limbaugh. People aren't that stupid in real life. NO ONE sincerely believed that we were actually fighting terrorists in Iraq, they just pretended to be that stupid because they wanted a fundamentalist to have power.

I say "Never assume incompetence where there could be evil."

I hate to burst your bubble, but yeah, some people are that stupid. Some people actually signed up to go overseas thinking that they were enforcing the will of god, and they still think it. Really.

 

[T-Dawg]

I hate to burst your bubble, but yeah, some people are that stupid. Some people actually signed up to go overseas thinking that they were enforcing the will of god, and they still think it. Really.

... Are you serious? How the hell does that happen? People aren't physically capable of being that stupid... are they???

 

[Alceste]

... Are you serious? How the hell does that happen? People aren't physically capable of being that stupid... are they???

They totally are. Bush bankrupted four or five oil businesses before he bankrupted the whole country. He's a genuinely, deeply stupid person. Cheney is just crazy, and Rove ... well maybe he's evil, but it's his own, fully human evil - not the evil of some supernatural entity.

I know it's hard to believe, but people can be incredibly stupid and still rise to dizzying heights of power and influence. What's worse, the stupider they are, the more they lack the necessary cognitive ability to recognize competence when they see it. Hence the Republican policy of making appointments based on party loyalty rather than competence and experience.

Many people close to the Bush administration noted his penchant for appointing astonishingly stupid people. Like Doug Feith, who general Tommy Franks refers to as "the f---ing stupidest person on the face of the Earth" (more than once), and whose job under Bush was to be in charge of pentagon policy and compile "evidence" against Iraq.