Do you regret studying what you ended up studying?

[TagliatelliMonster]

Do you regret studying what you ended up studying?

When I was doing my degree I did mostly social science and a bit of philosophy and psychology

I chose these as I find them interesting

I now wish I'd have studied maybe computer science or biology

But to be able to do those at university I'd have had to do different subjects at college

I don't regret having studied what I studied.
It's more that I kind of regret NOT having studied what I actually wanted to study.

I studied IT. I have always been interested in IT and like working with computers. And the money and job opportunities were good so that's what I ended up doing. I don't regret it.

What I actually wanted to study was a myriad of scientific subjects. Geology, archeology, paleontology,... Something about rocks and history has always fascinated me. I actually did the research and worked out all the studies I would have had to do... but it ended up being something like going to school till 32 and then either excel at the field and get to play Indiana Jones somewhere, or -much more likely- end up in some museum basement dusting off and cataloguing the findings of those others who got to play Indiana Jones somewhere.

I exaggerate, off course, but the truth behind the half-joke is off course that it was going to be a tremendous amount of work with very little chance of actually succeeding in ending up where I dreamed of ending up.

On the other hand, with IT at the time, they were like literally throwing mercedes company cars at you if you could code as little as a while loop

 

[VoidCat]

I like my major. It's early childhood education. But it is a hard field to work in. Ask me again in a few years in case I have gotten tired of it.

 

[Mock Turtle]

Do you regret studying what you ended up studying?

When I was doing my degree I did mostly social science and a bit of philosophy and psychology

I chose these as I find them interesting

I now wish I'd have studied maybe computer science or biology

But to be able to do those at university I'd have had to do different subjects at college

I don't particularly regret studying mechanical engineering given it introduced me into a very satisfying job (aircraft engineering) and as to meeting enough nice and intelligent individuals so as to make life very enjoyable for many years. But, I do believe that if there were different circumstances I would have done better academically (gone a lot further) and perhaps I would have gone off in a different direction. Plus the fact of even secondary education determining this - having to drop both French and Art to do Science (because of clashing) - and where it seems I was better in one (French), could have learnt more from another (Art) , and failed the last (Science) - mainly because I wasn't properly organised as to passing exams - until sometime later, when I did do very well.

So, who knows where I might have gone - but psychology has always interested me more than most things.

 

[PureX]

No regrets at all. I have always been an artist by nature, and so going to art school only served to help me find and join my 'tribe'.

 

[VoidCat]

Not sure there's any such thing as a house-husband.

Not in my view

Sex roles, damnit, eh? Modern folk won't have it!

I've met a few house husbands. It seems a lot of couples that have a housewife or husband choose who stays home based not just on gender but on who'd make the most money in a career, who would do best taking care of the kids, can said spouse work, would the spouses both be happy etc...folk base these types of decisions on a lot of things circumstances are much more complicated. Like say the husband works the wife stays at home but then husband got into a car crash and now is permanently disabled and can't find a job. The wife can work so she does. The husband may stay at home and clean. Or say the wife has a degree and the husband doesn't. The degree may make it easier for the wife to find a higher paying job then the husband and so the husband stays home with the kids. Or say the husband has a degree in child education and they want the kids homeschooled. Again the wife may work. Or the wife prefers working and the husband just wants to stay home and cook. Sometimes both have to work to make ends meet so no house husband or wife or both dont work due to both being disabled and unable to get a job so both are house spouses. In my opinion most cases it's not sex roles that decide house-spouse vs breadwinner but necessity and circumstance

 

[JustGeorge]

I've met a few house husbands. It seems a lot of couples that have a housewife or husband choose who stays home based not just on gender but on who'd make the most money in a career, who would do best taking care of the kids, can said spouse work, would the spouses both be happy etc...folk base these types of decisions on a lot of things circumstances are much more complicated. Like say the husband works the wife stays at home but then husband got into a car crash and now is permanently disabled and can't find a job. The wife can work so she does. The husband may stay at home and clean. Or say the wife has a degree and the husband doesn't. The degree may make it easier for the wife to find a higher paying job then the husband and so the husband stays home with the kids. Or say the husband has a degree in child education and they want the kids homeschooled. Again the wife may work. Or the wife prefers working and the husband just wants to stay home and cook. Sometimes both have to work to make ends meet so no house husband or wife or both dont work due to both being disabled and unable to get a job so both are house spouses. In my opinion most cases it's not sex roles that decide house-spouse vs breadwinner but necessity and circumstance

Cook?

Clean?

Where the hell does anyone find time for that?

(A lesson on why one should exercise caution when naming children for war lords.)

 

[PureX]

Mine was a trade where I had studied and trained to be a tractor trailer operator for which I've done for over a decade, but because of my health I cannot do my job anymore not because I can't legally drive, I can, but it's because people are just not going to hire somebody who have two heart attacks even if their cardiologist says it's perfectly safe for him to still operate a tractor trailer on the highway.
Long story short. I'm through, I cannot do my trade anymore because people don't want to hire somebody with heart attacks in their medical history regardless of assurances by cardiologist along with a letter with his signature.

So yeah, even though I achieved my lifelong dream of being a trucker, I regret it.

If I had only known, I would have stayed in college and completed my degree.

My dad drove trucks his whole life and loved it. Dump trucks, fuel semis, van semis, ... even after retirement he still would take on a driving job here and there just to keep his hand in it. He couldn't imagine doing anything else.

His friend was a potato farmer that worked 16 hours a day every day for his whole life, and loved every minute of it. Grew potatoes, raised pigs and chickens, made maple syrup, milked cows, anything and everything that paid a buck just to keep the farm going. He used to come plow out my dad's driveway with a oxygen bottle strapped to his face and stage 4 cancer. For him, to live is to work.

Trick is to find that thing that you really do enjoy doing and be good at it.

 

[Spice]

My dad drove trucks his whole life and loved it. Dump trucks, fuel semis, van semis, ... even after retirement he still would take on a driving job here and there just to keep his hand in it. He couldn't imagine doing anything else.

His friend was a potato farmer that worked 16 hours a day every day for his whole life, and loved every minute of it. Grew potatoes, raised pigs and chickens, made maple syrup, milked cows, anything and everything that paid a buck just to keep the farm going. He used to come plow out my dad's driveway with a oxygen bottle strapped to his face and stage 4 cancer. For him, to live is to work.

Trick is to find that thing that you really do enjoy doing and be good at it.

My middle brother was a mechanical draftsman. After he had a brain aneurysm to burst, and survived, he took the opportunity to get a job working outdoors around big machinery - his childhood dream of dumptrucks, bulldozers, etc. Of course he couldn't operate the equipment, but he loved being their go-fer. They'd send him to the store for sodas and snacks and have to write everything down, including the directions there and back, but he was useful. Some of the workers couldn't figure out why the boss had to write so much down and yet he was full of colorful stories to tell and had no problem driving the pickup. He used to say his elevator didn't go to the top floor anymore, but it still ran up and down every level below that killer headache he once had!

Such a great attitude! He had already eaten when I arrived at a family gathering once. He sat at the table while I ate to talk and visit. He suddenly looked up at his wife and said, "Hon, that chicken salad looks good. Did I like it?"

 

[lewisnotmiller]

Sorry.

Also... being a housewife is legitimate.

Don't know why this needs saying.

I think the issue with being a housewife is that you need to be part of a collective (eg. A partner, or other collective) to make it work fiscally, and even then it can require mutual sacrifice. Or more accurately, shared prioritisation, I would say .
As an example, my wife took a couple of years off work with our last child. She was neither a better nor worse person as a housewife. But she was a bit burnt ot from work, we thought more time available to our kids from either one of us was a positive, and we could afford to do it (although it got tight at times).

So, whilst there is nothing at all wrong with it, it's not available as an option for everyone.

 

[lewisnotmiller]

Trick is to find that thing that you really do enjoy doing and be good at it.

True, but only to a point.
I'm a pretty good junior basketball coach, and get paid to do it.
But even if I reached the absolute pinacle of that, I'm struggling to pay a mortgage and support kids.

Artists can also be amazing, but be very pressed financially.

Whereas I'm doing a job I can put up with that has good pay and flexibility, and that enables me to pay my mortgage, look after my family, and pursue my passion (if less so than I'd ideally like)

 

[Copernicus]

I have always loved learning about a great many subjects, but I found the perfect fit with linguistics--a multidisciplinary subject that allowed me to study philosophy, computer science, psychology, sociology, history, anthropology, literature, foreign languages, and a whole range of other subjects I have been interested in. I also found employment as an academic and industrial researcher in AI. So I have never regretted specializing in that subject, and I still learn new languages as a kind of hobby even retired and too damned old to be good at memorizing new vocabulary.

While an undergraduate, I studied in one of the country's best linguistics departments (Ohio State) with a legendary phonetician (Ilse Lehiste) as the department chair. She used to say that a job was what someone paid you to do, but a career was what you would pay someone else to let you do. I had a career and luckily found people who paid me to do it. No regrets on that score.

 

[mikkel_the_dane]

Do you regret studying what you ended up studying?

When I was doing my degree I did mostly social science and a bit of philosophy and psychology

I chose these as I find them interesting

I now wish I'd have studied maybe computer science or biology

But to be able to do those at university I'd have had to do different subjects at college

Not relevant as I am in effect special needs and can't really study.

 

[Rival]

I think the issue with being a housewife is that you need to be part of a collective (eg. A partner, or other collective) to make it work fiscally, and even then it can require mutual sacrifice. Or more accurately, shared prioritisation, I would say .

This is part of the point, really. I believe all life is about sacrifice and selflessness. You know, to the Jesus degree

 

[JustGeorge]

I think the issue with being a housewife is that you need to be part of a collective (eg. A partner, or other collective) to make it work fiscally, and even then it can require mutual sacrifice. Or more accurately, shared prioritisation, I would say .
As an example, my wife took a couple of years off work with our last child. She was neither a better nor worse person as a housewife. But she was a bit burnt ot from work, we thought more time available to our kids from either one of us was a positive, and we could afford to do it (although it got tight at times).

So, whilst there is nothing at all wrong with it, it's not available as an option for everyone.

I think it might actually depend on your income bracket/earnings as to whether or not its a sacrifice.

Where I am, the cost of childcare would have been quite close to what I was bringing in at my old job.

 

[metis]

Do you regret studying what you ended up studying?

No, not at all, although I started out in biology and phys ed and ended up in Anthropology, Sociology, and History.

 

[Eddi]

Anthropology, Sociology, and History.

Sounds like a good mix

 

[metis]

Sounds like a good mix

Thank you.

 

[Spice]

I think it might actually depend on your income bracket/earnings as to whether or not its a sacrifice.

Where I am, the cost of childcare would have been quite close to what I was bringing in at my old job.

Yes. That and your priorities. The "expectations" in our culture have changed quite a bit since the days of our parents or grandparents who lived with one, often modest, income. The Cleavers and The Andersons of the 50s and 60s were as over played as The Huckstables of the 80s. And from that type of preception grew today's expectations that for the most part are just not doable.

The culture today has expectations of every child having their own bedroom, plus a guestroom for visitors and a home with 2 1/2 bathrooms, minimum. And buyers want it all in tip-top perfection at closing.

The one income household needs to be prepared to have the parents room, the boy's room, and the girl's room, and a shared bathroom, with an eat-in kitchen and a living room and that's it! That covers the "needs" very well, of a single family, single income household.

I think of "the dream" expressed by FDR:
An automobile in every driveway, and two chickens in every pot.
We've gone overboard, IMO.

 

[JustGeorge]

Yes. That and your priorities. The "expectations" in our culture have changed quite a bit since the days of our parents or grandparents who lived with one, often modest, income. The Cleavers and The Andersons of the 50s and 60s were as over played as The Huckstables of the 80s. And from that type of preception grew today's expectations that for the most part are just not doable.

I agree. We're(as a society) not always the best at distinguishing wants and needs.

Even the internet is a 'want', and we lived without it until Covid.

The culture today has expectations of every child having their own bedroom, plus a guestroom for visitors and a home with 2 1/2 bathrooms, minimum. And buyers want it all in tip-top perfection at closing.

The one income household needs to be prepared to have the parents room, the boy's room, and the girl's room, and a shared bathroom, with an eat-in kitchen and a living room and that's it! That covers the "needs" very well, of a single family, single income household.

Even some of that is optional, really. We had a neighbor family with two parents and five kids. It was a poor neighborhood, and we were all poor people. There was a kids' room, and Mom and Dad's room(that had the baby's crib). But the place was well cared for, the kids always fed. On a personal level, I struggled with the two(but was friendly towards them anyways), but I thought they were excellent parents.

For awhile, I did the single parent thing. I had a roommate. We could only afford a two bedroom apartment. She took the big bedroom, I took the tiny bedroom, my son had the living room for his bedroom. The kitchen had a couch in it, and that was the living/eating space. We got on well, and it wasn't a negative experience.

You do what you have to do, and you appreciate what you have.

I think of "the dream" expressed by FDR:
An automobile in every driveway, and two chickens in every pot.
We've gone overboard, IMO.

Obtaining 'stuff' seems to be the be all, end all of existence for many.

 

[Spice]

Even some of that is optional, really. We had a neighbor family with two parents and five kids. It was a poor neighborhood, and we were all poor people. There was a kids' room, and Mom and Dad's room(that had the baby's crib). But the place was well cared for, the kids always fed. On a personal level, I struggled with the two(but was friendly towards them anyways), but I thought they were excellent parents.

My best friend in childhood never had a bedroom, or a bed. She grew up sleeping on the couch. It was not an unusual situation.

For awhile, I did the single parent thing. I had a roommate. We could only afford a two bedroom apartment. She took the big bedroom, I took the tiny bedroom, my son had the living room for his bedroom. The kitchen had a couch in it, and that was the living/eating space. We got on well, and it wasn't a negative experience.

My ESL students have been amazed at our societal living, but they've adjusted quickly. Only a year ago they had difficulty understanding why I lived alone, and each of my sons lives alone. But I hear how they are beginning to truly appreciate the privacy of having their own rooms in their shared accommodations, and some are beginning to move into their own "place."

You do what you have to do, and you appreciate what you have.

That is the blessing in living within your means.

Obtaining 'stuff' seems to be the be all, end all of existence for many.

Yes. . .keeping up with the Joneses.