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Do you believe in soul mates?

ThePainefulTruth

Romantic-Cynic
I think there are good and bad matches, but no one is a perfect match, and neither is there just one excellent match. Think about it: everybody's supposed to find their perfect match out of 7 billion people? It's a sentimental concept, but recognizing that doesn't undermine the genuine power of finding someone we can love without reservation.

On the other hand, having difficulty finding such a spouse shouldn't make us settle. Better to live your life unmatched, which doesn't mean you live alone.
 

Quintessence

Consults with Trees
Staff member
Premium Member
With respect to how you appear to be understanding the term "soul mate," no, I don't believe in it. As the story is told, it implies a particular set of values that I do not share and encourages expectations for interpersonal relationships that I find problematic. I threw out that story long ago, and replaced it with a vision of "soul mates" that doesn't enshrine monogamous marriages and unrealistic expectations.
 

Sultan Of Swing

Well-Known Member
I think that believing in 'soul-mates' places unrealistic expectations on your partner, and then you begin to doubt they truly are your soul-mate when they inevitably turn out to be imperfect.
 

Tumah

Veteran Member
I do believe in soul-mates.
I don't believe that soul-mate implies a perfect match, nor do I believe that one's only choice is to marry one's soul-mate.
I don't think that should be taken into consideration at all when looking for a spouse.
 

BSM1

What? Me worry?
If I didn't believe in "soul mates" the one I live with would certainly set me straight. She tells me we've been "soul mates" in many other lives. We've been together for almost 45 years so I don't have an argument against her.
 

A Vestigial Mote

Well-Known Member
"Kindred spirits" is a more realistic term. There are people you mesh with well, and those you simply can't.

A girl walked by me last night when I was walking my dog - staggered is actually a more appropriate term for what she was doing, as she seemed slightly inebriated. She crossed the street to get away from us, which I could understand - the dog is quite intimidating - however, as she passed all the way across the street she said in a slangy, urban-ish accent, so that I could hear, "Uh-huh, you keep that dog over there." - I had, of course, made no move, nor indication of approaching her whatsoever. For whatever reason I had a flash of thought that she was a complete and utter dunce - but not because she lacked mental faculty in any way. She was a moron because she chose certain ways to be, felt she knew the world, and knew what to expect from everyone and everything. She was a perfect example of someone I could likely never appreciate, and who could never appreciate me. I know I probably sound judgmental as I say this, but I honestly don't care. I know I was right in my assessment.

On the other hand, there was a girl I met who invited me to hang out with a bunch of her friends - that showed she was at least open to an idea of friendship, open without expectation. From word one we got along so well - I honestly can't even describe it, it was almost palpable - as if I could have reached out and touched whatever it was that was between us.

My point being that it is night and day the difference between those you find kinship with vs. those you do not, or cannot. Makes it seem dichotomous - that there may be that one, perfect person, but it isn't that way, of course. You just have to put yourself through enough encounters to find those you consider diamonds out in all that rough.
 

Demonslayer

Well-Known Member
Funny that most people just so happen to live near, work with, or went to school with the person that becomes their "soul mate."

PainefulTruth said it best, it's a nice romantic concept, is all. Otherwise you'd have a lot more cases of some 19 year old college kid from Cleveland having a 83 year old Chinese soul mate working in a textile plant in Beijing.
 

George-ananda

Advaita Vedanta, Theosophy, Spiritualism
Premium Member
I do believe in the concept (but perhaps not that everyone has one). I understand the term to mean that we have souls and the souls of the two people knew each other before birth and have shared a great affinity and mutual love. I think there is an ability to choose your birth and it is not random and that you incarnate with souls you have known before.
 

atanu

Member
Premium Member
I think there are good and bad matches, but no one is a perfect match, and neither is there just one excellent match. Think about it: everybody's supposed to find their perfect match out of 7 billion people? It's a sentimental concept, but recognizing that doesn't undermine the genuine power of finding someone we can love without reservation.

On the other hand, having difficulty finding such a spouse shouldn't make us settle. Better to live your life unmatched, which doesn't mean you live alone.

Is it possible to love unconditionally? I mean when, as per opinion of many, there is no conscious being beyond firing of neural network, how can there be any love at all? Just do as the network dictates.
 

Demonslayer

Well-Known Member
I don't think a soul is much involved at that stage.

I thought a soul was injected at the moment of conception? This is, if I'm not mistaken, the majority opinion of the religious or those who believe in souls.

At any rate, I find the idea of choosing your own birth patently absurd. Everyone would choose to be someone with a good life, no one would choose to be handicapped, destitute, mentally ill, etc. etc.

You think victims of micropenis syndrome, when deciding on what life they would life said "yeah, I think I'd like to go around with a pimple for a dick?" No way.
 
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