Mequa
Neo-Epicurean
Following @Saint Frankenstein 's thread I'm thinking of leaving RF. | ReligiousForums.com , I am also seriously considering leaving this site.
I can relate 100% to his feelings and experiences there, and greatly sympathise with them. I commented on his thread, however I thought I'd also take the opportunity to reiterate and expand upon my concerns on this thread.
The disrespect I've got from some members has been very toxic to me and is impacting very negatively on my mental health. Of course, they just don't get it, and my sincere expression of my feelings and concerns is dismissed completely.
My wanting to be treated with dignity and basic respect is too demanding for some people, it seems. As is considering I am a real person with real feelings.
Toxic people always think it's the other person with the problem. No introspection. No consideration for the other person's feelings or perspective, which they just accuse of being "whining".
I've seen a very nasty pecking order in chat here with a clique of some people seeking to shut anyone up with opposing views, resorting to passive-aggressive b/s, while simultaneously seeing themselves as enlightened liberal freethinkers. Their perception seems to be that anyone asking them to show basic respect is acting like a tyrant seeking to control them. They act as the arbiter of how other people should behave and what topics and points of view are off limits, being happy to employ ridicule and shaming to silence dissent and having no concern for how uncomfortable other people are made to feel, while simultaneously having zero tolerance towards any critique of their own behaviour and points of view.
It's like highschool all over again, the "cool kids" virtually get away with murder, they know they can get away with being rude, disrespectful and inconsiderate as well as getting anyone with opposing views to shut up, and have a full-blown sense of entitlement to get away with such.
Of course, they'd be more than happy to dismiss my perspective and feelings here as complete nonsense and accuse me of being the one with the problem, as is their M.O. My sincere expression of how I feel is just "whining", and either I am just "lying" about how I feel, or I am "defective" or "lesser than" for feeling that way.
In addition to the above, I have seen some rather nasty bigotry here. For example, one highly popular member in chat expressed discrimination against people with mental health issues, asking how could I possibly like another member as she is "mental", then saying she dislikes it when people with untreated mental health issues make fools of themselves. Completely ignoring the issue as to when adequate treatment is not available. I don't have to reiterate how such behaviour creates a toxic environment for many people.
It does me no good to continue as a member here. I feel in a very bad place whenever I log out, for many hours after, and my use of this site is having very powerful negative effects on my mental health and general well-being, and even my physical health, given that I have heart surgery coming up soon.
It is probably best for me from now on if I limit my time and contributions to places I actually feel respected as a person and as an individual.
I can relate 100% to his feelings and experiences there, and greatly sympathise with them. I commented on his thread, however I thought I'd also take the opportunity to reiterate and expand upon my concerns on this thread.
The disrespect I've got from some members has been very toxic to me and is impacting very negatively on my mental health. Of course, they just don't get it, and my sincere expression of my feelings and concerns is dismissed completely.
My wanting to be treated with dignity and basic respect is too demanding for some people, it seems. As is considering I am a real person with real feelings.
Toxic people always think it's the other person with the problem. No introspection. No consideration for the other person's feelings or perspective, which they just accuse of being "whining".
I've seen a very nasty pecking order in chat here with a clique of some people seeking to shut anyone up with opposing views, resorting to passive-aggressive b/s, while simultaneously seeing themselves as enlightened liberal freethinkers. Their perception seems to be that anyone asking them to show basic respect is acting like a tyrant seeking to control them. They act as the arbiter of how other people should behave and what topics and points of view are off limits, being happy to employ ridicule and shaming to silence dissent and having no concern for how uncomfortable other people are made to feel, while simultaneously having zero tolerance towards any critique of their own behaviour and points of view.
It's like highschool all over again, the "cool kids" virtually get away with murder, they know they can get away with being rude, disrespectful and inconsiderate as well as getting anyone with opposing views to shut up, and have a full-blown sense of entitlement to get away with such.
Of course, they'd be more than happy to dismiss my perspective and feelings here as complete nonsense and accuse me of being the one with the problem, as is their M.O. My sincere expression of how I feel is just "whining", and either I am just "lying" about how I feel, or I am "defective" or "lesser than" for feeling that way.
In addition to the above, I have seen some rather nasty bigotry here. For example, one highly popular member in chat expressed discrimination against people with mental health issues, asking how could I possibly like another member as she is "mental", then saying she dislikes it when people with untreated mental health issues make fools of themselves. Completely ignoring the issue as to when adequate treatment is not available. I don't have to reiterate how such behaviour creates a toxic environment for many people.
It does me no good to continue as a member here. I feel in a very bad place whenever I log out, for many hours after, and my use of this site is having very powerful negative effects on my mental health and general well-being, and even my physical health, given that I have heart surgery coming up soon.
It is probably best for me from now on if I limit my time and contributions to places I actually feel respected as a person and as an individual.