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Why bother debating or discussing?

Jos

Well-Known Member
Based on the brief amount of time I've spent on this forum and that I've spent involved in/looking at debates with others concerning matters of religion, faith, metaphysics etc away from this forum, it seems to me that these discussions make no sense since the participants involved don't enter into it with good faith ie. a willingness to be open minded and change one's mind or position if shown to be incorrect. Both believers and non believers alike, including myself, it seems, only want to demonstrate why they're correct and the other person is wrong rather than genuinely wanting to listen to the other side and change one's mind if they're shown to be wrong and so I ask what's the point in discussing and debating if everyone's just out to prove how right they are and how wrong everyone else is? Heck even on this forum, some believers' only purpose seems to be proselytizing or proving that their religion/faith is correct while tearing down any religion that disagrees with their own whereas the purpose of some non believers seems to be to prove that religion is false or God doesn't exist or is imaginary and that anyone who believes any of it is foolish... with all this, one has to wonder what's the point?
 
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PureX

Veteran Member
Based on the brief amount of time I've spent on this forum and that I've spent involved in/looking at debates with others concerning matters of religion, faith, metaphysics etc away from this forum, it seems to me that these discussions make no sense since the participants involved don't enter into it with good faith ie. a willingness to be open minded and change one's mind or position if shown to be incorrect. Both believers and non believers alike, including myself, it seems, only want to demonstrate why they're correct and the other person is wrong rather than genuinely wanting to listen to the other side and change one's mind if they're shown to be wrong and so I ask what's the point in discussing and debating if everyone's just out to prove how right they are and how wrong everyone else? Heck even on this forum, some believers' only purpose seems to be proving that their religion/faith is correct while tearing down any religion that disagrees with their own whereas the purpose of some non believers seems to be to prove that religion is false or God doesn't exist or is imaginary and that anyone who believes any of it is foolish... with all this, one has to wonder what's the point?
The human ego an amazingly persistent task-master.
 

Spirit of Light

Be who ever you want
Sometimes there is a lot to learn in discussion like we can have here, But sometimes topics would be wise to stay away from because some people can be both offended and angry if you have a very different view or understanding than them.
But most of the time discussion is good, maybe best to discuss with people from religious background as you self, then it tend to be longer good discussions, with respect and happiness.
 

sun rise

The world is on fire
Premium Member
want to demonstrate why they're correct and the other person is wrong rather than genuinely wanting to listen to the other side and change one's mind if they're shown to be wrong and so I ask what's the point in discussing and debating if everyone's just out to prove how right they are and how wrong everyone else?

@Rival wrote for me.

First, given that the operation of the personal ego is to do exactly what you noted - uphold what they believe to be true. And very very few have transcended that desire.

There are a few who are very interested in learning more or have real questions they want feedback on.

So why do I post here? One reason is to try to answer non-rhetorical questions. Another reason is to have fun in joke threads. But the biggest reason is that I'm as human as anyone else and want people to agree with me. :D
 

paarsurrey

Veteran Member
Based on the brief amount of time I've spent on this forum and that I've spent involved in/looking at debates with others concerning matters of religion, faith, metaphysics etc away from this forum, it seems to me that these discussions make no sense since the participants involved don't enter into it with good faith ie. a willingness to be open minded and change one's mind or position if shown to be incorrect. Both believers and non believers alike, including myself, it seems, only want to demonstrate why they're correct and the other person is wrong rather than genuinely wanting to listen to the other side and change one's mind if they're shown to be wrong and so I ask what's the point in discussing and debating if everyone's just out to prove how right they are and how wrong everyone else? Heck even on this forum, some believers' only purpose seems to be proving that their religion/faith is correct while tearing down any religion that disagrees with their own whereas the purpose of some non believers seems to be to prove that religion is false or God doesn't exist or is imaginary and that anyone who believes any of it is foolish... with all this, one has to wonder what's the point?
Peaceful dialogue is always useful in one way or the other. Right, please?
Regards
 

Vinayaka

devotee
Premium Member
Not all folks choose to live within the right/wrong paradigm. If you view everything as opinion, or belief, it eliminates the need for right and wrong. But because this paradigm seems to be the dominant one in some places on this planet, it seems like it's everywhere. But really it isn't. Lots of folks are just fine with ... "Hey that's your belief. Likewise I have mine."
 

LuisDantas

Aura of atheification
Premium Member
Based on the brief amount of time I've spent on this forum and that I've spent involved in/looking at debates with others concerning matters of religion, faith, metaphysics etc away from this forum, it seems to me that these discussions make no sense since the participants involved don't enter into it with good faith ie. a willingness to be open minded and change one's mind or position if shown to be incorrect. Both believers and non believers alike, including myself, it seems, only want to demonstrate why they're correct and the other person is wrong rather than genuinely wanting to listen to the other side and change one's mind if they're shown to be wrong and so I ask what's the point in discussing and debating if everyone's just out to prove how right they are and how wrong everyone else? Heck even on this forum, some believers' only purpose seems to be proving that their religion/faith is correct while tearing down any religion that disagrees with their own whereas the purpose of some non believers seems to be to prove that religion is false or God doesn't exist or is imaginary and that anyone who believes any of it is foolish... with all this, one has to wonder what's the point?
Various motivations.

One of the main ones, I would think, is the desire to have an audience. People hate to feel unable to contribute.

A related one is the thrill of being a part of some sort of "brave resistence".

Also, I would guess that many of us, of an impressively wide variety of stances, feel sincerely upset at seeing certain claims and statements and have a hard time refusing to challenge them.

Then again, there are many unadvisable motivations as well, as I am certain that you have noticed. Including plain old arrogance (not always quite conscious) and mental illness.
 

Brickjectivity

wind and rain touch not this brain
Staff member
Premium Member
Both believers and non believers alike, including myself, it seems, only want to demonstrate why they're correct...
Rather than simple pretention, its usually driven by several things. One of those things is the need to get free of previous ideas and individuate. Sometimes its driven by a desire to be helpful. Sometimes its somebody who just wants to talk to someone other than themselves. Very often, yes, pride gets hurts; and that's what feeds the trolls. Hurt pride though doesn't last very long in a debate forum. Most of what you see are people trying to help themselves or others and is not simple pretense or cruelty.

...since the participants involved don't enter into it with good faith ie. a willingness to be open minded and change one's mind or position if shown to be incorrect.
Willingness to give an inch is not usually rewarded. It takes 2 to make it a decent discussion but only one to make it a rotten discussion. 2 can carry on in a rotten discussion for many pages.

Heck even on this forum, some believers' only purpose seems to be proving that their religion/faith is correct while tearing down any religion that disagrees with their own whereas the purpose of some non believers seems to be to prove that religion is false or God doesn't exist or is imaginary and that anyone who believes any of it is foolish... with all this, one has to wonder what's the point?
Often that is out of a desire to see all people united and is not necessarily just pretense.

I ask what's the point in discussing and debating if everyone's just out to prove how right they are and how wrong everyone else?
Keep this in mind that heavy debate is against rules in every area of this site except areas marked for such. They will say 'Debate' on them. Everywhere else it is assumed you are commenting and are not criticizing the comments of other users of the site.

I can give you several reasons to keep going, but there are also reasons to stop. If its not for you and makes you feel upset then take a time out or only participate in non-debate areas. You can also put people onto your ignore lists (and take them off). You will no longer see their posts and won't receive messages from them while they are on your ignore list.

Reasons to debate: make friends, demonstrate through patience a kind of superiority, test your wits, have a dirty political spat, feel out what kinds of arguments other people will come up with, prove your mettle, learn about debate principles and logical thinking, learn just how stubborn people are. Sometimes you don't know how stubborn people are until you see it for yourself.

Reasons not to debate: you have other things to do. You feel that somebody is getting hurt. You've stopped learning. You don't enjoy it.
 

Brickjectivity

wind and rain touch not this brain
Staff member
Premium Member
One of the main ones, I would think, is the desire to have an audience. People hate to feel unable to contribute.
Luis, I don't know if you like English poetry at all; but there is a famous poem all US kids have to read in school called "Do not go gentle into that good night." It puts forth reasons that people resist dying. One of them is this line "Though wise men at their end know dark is right - because their words had forked no lightning -- they do not go gentle into that good night." See if you like it.
Do not go gentle into that good night by Dylan Thomas - Poems | poets.org
 

PoetPhilosopher

Veteran Member
Based on the brief amount of time I've spent on this forum and that I've spent involved in/looking at debates with others concerning matters of religion, faith, metaphysics etc away from this forum, it seems to me that these discussions make no sense since the participants involved don't enter into it with good faith ie. a willingness to be open minded and change one's mind or position if shown to be incorrect. Both believers and non believers alike, including myself, it seems, only want to demonstrate why they're correct and the other person is wrong rather than genuinely wanting to listen to the other side and change one's mind if they're shown to be wrong and so I ask what's the point in discussing and debating if everyone's just out to prove how right they are and how wrong everyone else? Heck even on this forum, some believers' only purpose seems to be proselytizing or proving that their religion/faith is correct while tearing down any religion that disagrees with their own whereas the purpose of some non believers seems to be to prove that religion is false or God doesn't exist or is imaginary and that anyone who believes any of it is foolish... with all this, one has to wonder what's the point?

There are honest debaters, and there are those covered by human nature. Just shows we live in an imperfect world.
 

LuisDantas

Aura of atheification
Premium Member
Luis, I don't know if you like English poetry at all; but there is a famous poem all US kids have to read in school called "Do not go gentle into that good night."

An eerie one at that! I became aware of it by way of the Night Man comics by Steve Englehart. It is impressive, spooky even.

"Rage! Rage against the dying of the light!"

It puts forth reasons that people resist dying. One of them is this line "Though wise men at their end know dark is right - because their words had forked no lightning -- they do not go gentle into that good night." See if you like it.
Do not go gentle into that good night by Dylan Thomas - Poems | poets.org

Thanks!
 

Evangelicalhumanist

"Truth" isn't a thing...
Premium Member
Based on the brief amount of time I've spent on this forum and that I've spent involved in/looking at debates with others concerning matters of religion, faith, metaphysics etc away from this forum, it seems to me that these discussions make no sense since the participants involved don't enter into it with good faith ie. a willingness to be open minded and change one's mind or position if shown to be incorrect. Both believers and non believers alike, including myself, it seems, only want to demonstrate why they're correct and the other person is wrong rather than genuinely wanting to listen to the other side and change one's mind if they're shown to be wrong and so I ask what's the point in discussing and debating if everyone's just out to prove how right they are and how wrong everyone else is? Heck even on this forum, some believers' only purpose seems to be proselytizing or proving that their religion/faith is correct while tearing down any religion that disagrees with their own whereas the purpose of some non believers seems to be to prove that religion is false or God doesn't exist or is imaginary and that anyone who believes any of it is foolish... with all this, one has to wonder what's the point?
It's a fair question...one I think about myself (though it doesn't stop me from being just as guilty).

I cannot answer for the other side (the religious side), but I can say that I have learned from my own experience and from my reading of history (and current events) to be very afraid of all ideologies and strongly held belief systems which do not stand upon evidence or sufficient reason. And I cannot agree that ancient literature (and there's a lot of it informing all sorts of wildly different belief systems) alone stands as a firm basis for reasoning. Any good theorem must be built up from powerfully strong axioms, or from prior theorems (similarly backed) linked by logic and reason.

What I do know is this: from my vantage point in the 21st century, I can say that the Western liberal democracies of Europe, North American (including the US, which for all that it's Republican today is still a "liberal democracy") and Australasia, ordinary people have reached a position in the last 5 centuries which at the beginning of those centuries could only be attained by a tiny, tiny minority of people, namely, aristocrats and senior clergy.

And I know, also, that this enormous change (and it is huge, you would not want to be a common person 500 years ago), was achieved through reason and enlightenment (in "The Enlightenment" sense). And the pushing aside of the dogma and ideologies that caused so much misery.

Ignorance is so much to be feared, and tragically, even today, here on these forums, it bares it's ugly head everywhere. (Remember what Dickens said in A Christmas Carol about the two children at the Ghost of Christmas Present's feet: "This boy is Ignorance. This girl is Want. Beware them both, and all of their degree; but most of all beware this boy, for on his brow I see that written which is Doom, unless the writing be erased."
 

Audie

Veteran Member
Based on the brief amount of time I've spent on this forum and that I've spent involved in/looking at debates with others concerning matters of religion, faith, metaphysics etc away from this forum, it seems to me that these discussions make no sense since the participants involved don't enter into it with good faith ie. a willingness to be open minded and change one's mind or position if shown to be incorrect. Both believers and non believers alike, including myself, it seems, only want to demonstrate why they're correct and the other person is wrong rather than genuinely wanting to listen to the other side and change one's mind if they're shown to be wrong and so I ask what's the point in discussing and debating if everyone's just out to prove how right they are and how wrong everyone else is? Heck even on this forum, some believers' only purpose seems to be proselytizing or proving that their religion/faith is correct while tearing down any religion that disagrees with their own whereas the purpose of some non believers seems to be to prove that religion is false or God doesn't exist or is imaginary and that anyone who believes any of it is foolish... with all this, one has to wonder what's the point?

uh, like, because ya is wrong and needs ta
get straightened out????
 

Quintessence

Consults with Trees
Staff member
Premium Member
As @Vinayaka mentions, not all of us are in the "right versus wrong" paradigm. For some of us, it is a matter of being content with who we are and our way of life. Why should we discard our culture and replace it with someone else's? Sure, we aren't interested in "changing our minds," but we can be interested in sharing our culture with others and in turn learning about other cultures too. The goal does not have to be conversion or what amounts to proselytizing.
 

Notanumber

A Free Man
Could we have the same kind of discussions in polite society that we have on here?

I like to know what others really think and you won’t find that out in polite society.
 

Quintessence

Consults with Trees
Staff member
Premium Member
Could we have the same kind of discussions in polite society that we have on here?

I like to know what others really think and you won’t find that out in polite society.

You can. Years back, I frequented a philosophical discussion group that talked about all sorts of controversial and hot button issues. We had members of diametrically opposed groups who attended this regularly, but we all cultivated the atmosphere of being able to tell our stories and respectfully disagree. I was one of a couple Pagans in the group, and the Evangelical Christian flat out said to us he believed we were going to hell (among other things). We all just dealt with it instead of freaking out about people having different views. It didn't keep us from having polite conversations.

I kind of miss that group...
 

Notanumber

A Free Man
You can. Years back, I frequented a philosophical discussion group that talked about all sorts of controversial and hot button issues. We had members of diametrically opposed groups who attended this regularly, but we all cultivated the atmosphere of being able to tell our stories and respectfully disagree. I was one of a couple Pagans in the group, and the Evangelical Christian flat out said to us he believed we were going to hell (among other things). We all just dealt with it instead of freaking out about people having different views. It didn't keep us from having polite conversations.

I kind of miss that group...

In the UK, you have to be very careful about what you say in public.
 
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