Aštra’el
Aštara, Blade of Aštoreth
I will strive to be less “effeminate” as well (as you defined it).
Too often- even if it is much less compared to whoever- have I been aware of time passing by as I am overindulging in the pleasures of life, when I could be actively changing the world and reshaping it my image. And while part of me enjoys the gratification of those temporary pleasures and distractions- and the brief respite from stress and responsibility, in the back of my mind a part of me is tormented, because it is aware of everything else that could be done in that moment.
I am wholly aware of the distractions. I am aware of the chains, dragging me back into an abyss I fought so hard to escape from. It is a deception, telling me “this is worth my time because it feels good.” I am aware of the obstacles in the path before me standing in the way of my greatest dreams and ambitions... chaining me down, blinding me, tempting me to deny, to forget, to forsake and uncommit. I like to believe I am not so easily swayed, but I have been, at times.
Effiminacy, hedonism, whatever you wish to call it. It is an enemy of True Will, at least for me.
Let there less of that, and let there be more of our dreams becoming a reality.
Too often- even if it is much less compared to whoever- have I been aware of time passing by as I am overindulging in the pleasures of life, when I could be actively changing the world and reshaping it my image. And while part of me enjoys the gratification of those temporary pleasures and distractions- and the brief respite from stress and responsibility, in the back of my mind a part of me is tormented, because it is aware of everything else that could be done in that moment.
I am wholly aware of the distractions. I am aware of the chains, dragging me back into an abyss I fought so hard to escape from. It is a deception, telling me “this is worth my time because it feels good.” I am aware of the obstacles in the path before me standing in the way of my greatest dreams and ambitions... chaining me down, blinding me, tempting me to deny, to forget, to forsake and uncommit. I like to believe I am not so easily swayed, but I have been, at times.
Effiminacy, hedonism, whatever you wish to call it. It is an enemy of True Will, at least for me.
Let there less of that, and let there be more of our dreams becoming a reality.