Aštra’el

“Hear me. Make of thyselves that which ye desire. Be it a lord. Be it a god. But should ye fail to become ought at all, ye will be forsaken… amounting only to sacrifices.”




The Paradise and the Storm

Imagine a beautiful paradise, under a colorful but mostly red sky and an eternal sunset. There are desert areas and there are tropical areas. You see mountains, waterfalls, and lava falls. You find paths to sacred places, and forbidden caves leading into the unknown. There are ruins of ancient temples once built by ancient gods, and soothing lightning storms and winds and serene rains.

But beyond the borders of this paradise is a living storm, something you can not even comprehend... an eternal whirlwind of raging blackness with distant streaks of bright red and violet energies and lightnings, circling around this paradise beyond the horizon.

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What is the paradise and what is the storm? Some might interpret the paradise as the world we each choose to see, and the storm the world as it truly is. One, a comforting delusion... the other, a harsh, cruel and unforgiving reality. Perhaps it is not so different from the world we already live in… a world just as beautiful as it is cruel.

Interpret as you will but here is how I see it…

The paradise is me. The storm is me. It is like... a throneworld, where everything I feel inside manifests around me. The paradise is who I am in some moments, the storm is who I am in other moments. It is who I am, who I was and who I am yet to be. Who I could be, at any given moment. Sometimes I am both at once, or something else entirely. It is a collection of thoughts and behaviors compiled and reinterpreted into a beautiful visualization. These are who I am, but also my greatest dreams pulling at my reality, taking me in the direction I Will with invisible magnetic strings. Not strings of fate. Strings of Will. True Will.

I might be described as a “polytheist”. My gods are shards of my soul, each encompassing several areas of human nature. These shards may come in many different colors and designs but within the reflection of each and every shard it is my own face I see staring back at me.

It can be said that my gods are portraits… just like the paradise, and just like the storm. They are self portraits of my own greatest inclinations, my ambition given form, embodiments of my ultimate dreams and fantasies… but also magnificent portraits of humanity collectively, in all our beauty and terror… and majestic portraits of nature within and around me.

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“Seven headed dragon with twelve wings and thirteen halos...”

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-Redacted-

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My Aspect is Aštoreth, who wields in one hand a sword from Above and in the other a sword from Below. Balance is my calling. Balance is my passion. Sun, Moon, Heaven, Hell, Order, Chaos.... Creation, Destruction.


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