Please Help!

[Comet]

Really? How many do you have that you CAN count?
I was an only child until I was six, then my half-brother and half-sister were born (twins). And that's it Although, to me, they might as well be my full-blooded brother and sister. I love them more than anyone else in the world.
Although my dad is getting remarried soon....so I'll have three step-siblings. Two sisters and a brother.
But apparently the two girls are older, out of the house, living in California and don't talk to their mom (the woman my dad is marrying) any more. One of them even has a kid.
The son, however, is 16 and I love him. He's freakin' cool to hang out with, and really smart. I think he'll be a good influence on my little brother and sister.

I agree with you completely on the jealousy/exes thing. Although sounds like your ex-wife at least knew she had a good thing going and didn't want to lose it (even if she went about "protecting" you the wrong way)
Heh...my ex-fiance was still friends with his ex-girlfriend, and got really really p***ed off when I finally met her, and she liked me more. It was hilarious, because not only did we become really good friends (still are), but she totally wanted in my pants
I think that if someone was important enough to you that you dated and had a serious relationship with them, then it only makes sense that you would want to keep such a good friend in your life (assuming you still get along).
The only reason I'm not still friends with any of my exes is that...well, I suppose it's because I tend to date jerks lol. Or at least, guys that turned into jerks so I ended up having to break things off with them, or ones that went psycho after the break up....Anywho, not going to punish you with my brief yet gory dating history.

That's so cool! I wish I could see the images they get from those bone scans.
Man, I've gotta start hanging out in hospitals again....They get to see all the neat stuff

Breast injections?!!!? No thank you!

I have one older sister, a younger half sister, two younger step sisters, and an older exstep sister. All of whom I still talk to. Then I have two younger step brothers and an older exstep brother, none of whom I talk to lest I bump into them. I grew up mostly with my sister, then summers with my half sister and exstep sister and brother. I got to know my new step sister for she went to school here, so we got to see each other now and then. My youngest step sister starts highschool next year and we talk. My distorted family tree indeed!

My exwife was one for the ages! I know how to attract them, let me tell you. She'd even get mad at Bure (pronounced like the blender setting of puree) for liking me more. Talk about insane, I'm a cat person and she knew that. She'd get mad at me and the poor cat! Can you blame Bure for liking me better? That is one of the few things I kept in my divorce. I told her I'm keeping the cats and my car! I can't have my babies living with a crazy woman!

She was very jealous of anybody I talked to. Even going out with the guys for poker night, she'd get mad; waitresses, random people, etc... Part of living with a manic depressive though. I took care of her way too much. After I filed for the divorce, her new man tossed her out six months later, and now she is back home with her parents. Her loss and I'm much better off and been happier the past 3+ years. It is one thing to be with somebody with issues, but a manic depressive who won't take medications is another thing! After 5 years, her changing her wardrobe over night and makeup too, and me starting to get calls from the guys she was meeting at the bars, I had enough.

She told me she had a place to go and wanted a separation for a while since there were things she just had to do. I told her no! I told her you stay and work it out or you leave and never come back. She left, I filed for divorce the next day. The rest is history; I'm just mad I had to sell my house. Oh well, life goes on. Sorry, I went off on a tangent there!:slapjust smack me when I do that)

I tend to attract psychos! Ha ha ha. Been that way my whole life. Put me in a room with 100 women who want to date me and I'll pick the one that has the most issues of them all! Seriously, it would happen! I've been so careful the past 3 years as to who I date, that I barely date at all anymore. The last two girls I dated, love them to death/still friends, have major issues! ha ha ha... I guess I have issues these days myself! I'm working on my new issues though. lol

 

[Stellify]

I have one older sister, a younger half sister, two younger step sisters, and an older exstep sister. All of whom I still talk to. Then I have two younger step brothers and an older exstep brother, none of whom I talk to lest I bump into them. I grew up mostly with my sister, then summers with my half sister and exstep sister and brother. I got to know my new step sister for she went to school here, so we got to see each other now and then. My youngest step sister starts highschool next year and we talk. My distorted family tree indeed!

My exwife was one for the ages! I know how to attract them, let me tell you. She'd even get mad at Bure (pronounced like the blender setting of puree) for liking me more. Talk about insane, I'm a cat person and she knew that. She'd get mad at me and the poor cat! Can you blame Bure for liking me better? That is one of the few things I kept in my divorce. I told her I'm keeping the cats and my car! I can't have my babies living with a crazy woman!

She was very jealous of anybody I talked to. Even going out with the guys for poker night, she'd get mad; waitresses, random people, etc... Part of living with a manic depressive though. I took care of her way too much. After I filed for the divorce, her new man tossed her out six months later, and now she is back home with her parents. Her loss and I'm much better off and been happier the past 3+ years. It is one thing to be with somebody with issues, but a manic depressive who won't take medications is another thing! After 5 years, her changing her wardrobe over night and makeup too, and me starting to get calls from the guys she was meeting at the bars, I had enough.

She told me she had a place to go and wanted a separation for a while since there were things she just had to do. I told her no! I told her you stay and work it out or you leave and never come back. She left, I filed for divorce the next day. The rest is history; I'm just mad I had to sell my house. Oh well, life goes on. Sorry, I went off on a tangent there!(just smack me when I do that)

I tend to attract psychos! Ha ha ha. Been that way my whole life. Put me in a room with 100 women who want to date me and I'll pick the one that has the most issues of them all! Seriously, it would happen! I've been so careful the past 3 years as to who I date, that I barely date at all anymore. The last two girls I dated, love them to death/still friends, have major issues! ha ha ha... I guess I have issues these days myself! I'm working on my new issues though. lol

Oh man, you wanna talk about distorted family trees?! Muahaha.....*rubs hands together* Where shall I start?
Mom's side of the family I have a step-grandmother, step-uncle, three first-step-cousins, step-aunt once removed, and enough 2nd and third and fourth step-cousins to fill a stadium! But most of them are in another country.
Dad's side of the family, I have my two half-siblings, my future three step-siblings, the step-niece or nephew (don't know if it's a girl or boy), future stepmother, step-grandfather, step-grandmother, more step-cousins, step-aunts, step-uncles, then I have my EX-step-mother, my ex-step-grandmother, my ex-step-aunt, ex-step-uncle, ex-step-uncle once removed, two ex-step-cousins, and once ex-step-cousin once removed. The ex-step-family are all Mexican and British When I see them, I always end up with a slight British accent, it's hilarious.

*whew*

yeah....my room mate sometimes gets upset that our cat likes me better...I look at her and go, "you dunk her in the bathtub and constantly tell her you hate her....?" :areyoucra

Oh man, I'm sorry about your ex. Manic depressives are a handful. Especially if they don't medicate to even out their different episodes.
That must have been really, really tough on you. :hug: It sounds like you did the right thing, though. I'm really glad you're better off now

Heh...tell me about it. One of my exes cheated on me with a gross-looking pathalogical liar with various other mental issues, who also happened to be his best friend's girlfriend (and who has since had his best friend's child).
My most recent ex decided it would be a good idea to harass me over texts, phone calls, emails, and in person after we broke up. I almost had to get a restraining order because he tried to break into my old apartment, and actually started to get physically violent with me one day when I was telling him to leave my room mate and I alone and stop coming by the apt. He also went and told anyone who would listen that I was drinking heavily, doing drugs, and going home with random guys on a nightly basis.....(I was hanging out at my friend's business....where everyone is very anti-drugs...talking and watching movies after-hours. Every night. For weeks. I didn't even go on a date, hold anyone's hand, or get kissed for months after we broke up. )

As for your issues...We all have them It's what we do with them that matters.

I could go on for paragraphs about how many problems I have. I think most people could. But I know that I'm always trying to figure out the roots of my issues and make them better

One of my own personal philosophies is that someone can be as f***ed up as you can imagine, but I'm totally ok with it and willing to help out, as long as they're making an effort towards self-betterment. If they know they have a problem, but don't care and just expect the rest of the world to "deal with it", then I get miffed.
That being said, you obviously fall into the good category

 

[Comet]

I'm glad I fall into the good category!

I once had an exgirlfriend in highschool stalk me! She would call my house at 2AM all the time to talk to me, she drove the wrestling team by my house, she'd be in my driveway when I got home and the drive off, she even had her new boyfriend try to beat me up and then broke up with him for trying to beat me up! Seriously! My parents almost got a restraining order on her, it was that bad!

Yes, my marriage was very tough on me. It also didn't help with my whole "being the strong one" thing. In that relationship I had to be strong 24/7!

 

[Stellify]

I'm glad I fall into the good category!

I once had an exgirlfriend in highschool stalk me! She would call my house at 2AM all the time to talk to me, she drove the wrestling team by my house, she'd be in my driveway when I got home and the drive off, she even had her new boyfriend try to beat me up and then broke up with him for trying to beat me up! Seriously! My parents almost got a restraining order on her, it was that bad!

Yes, my marriage was very tough on me. It also didn't help with my whole "being the strong one" thing. In that relationship I had to be strong 24/7!

Wow, that's creepy

Yeah...I get you on that one. It was the fourteen years I spent taking care of my mom that gave me the "strong one" and "caretaker" complex. It was something I had to keep up constantly. Once you do it for so long, it's hard to stop.....it just becomes part of life.


Dude, I am STILL laughing about the lab coat thing.....


Oh, by the way....My cat has begun fearing the evil squirt bottle of doom. Now she tries to be sneakier about getting into trouble lol. :cover:

 

[Comet]

Wow, that's creepy

Yeah...I get you on that one. It was the fourteen years I spent taking care of my mom that gave me the "strong one" and "caretaker" complex. It was something I had to keep up constantly. Once you do it for so long, it's hard to stop.....it just becomes part of life.


Dude, I am STILL laughing about the lab coat thing.....


Oh, by the way....My cat has begun fearing the evil squirt bottle of doom. Now she tries to be sneakier about getting into trouble lol. :cover:

The evil squirt bottle of doom works every time! Maybe I'll take that picture for you! :flirt::yes: I can always bring one home with me and do it there, people at work might wonder what I'm up to if I did it here! lol

 

[Stellify]

The evil squirt bottle of doom works every time! Maybe I'll take that picture for you! :flirt::yes: I can always bring one home with me and do it there, people at work might wonder what I'm up to if I did it here! lol

Oh man....I can just picture you running around a radioactive lab flashing random people....Like the guy in the trench coat you see in cartoons and Monty Python that runs around exposing himself...lol

 

[Comet]

In the lab, I may as well go do that at Wal-Mart! Then I'd be on the news!

PS- you do not have permission to post that photo!

 

[Comet]

I know nobody reads this anymore, except Stelly and Butter....

The thread is what it is, I guess. I was just getting down again, then I was better. My cats were being cute and laying in the sunshine, so I took a couple of pictures. Then I was still down so I thought about calling my friends. Then the song I was listening to said, "If the feelings gone, words won't stop you anyway."

That brought me down as well thinking about that night. I talked to many, what they said didn't matter. I don't want to hit that point again. So, if anybody is out there.... lets talk about whatever. I hate it when I get like this, I never used to get like this!

Anyway, I'm sure I'm just talking to myself and I don't really feel like reaching out... but I will when I get "there". So, if anybody else is listening.... I'm down again for some reason.

 

[Comet]

I know what set me off... there was a cop car parked outside my place. It is just like the night I watched COPS and got set off by the handcuffs.... I'm working through it, if anybody cares. I'd really rather talk about something, or to somebody about this. Whatever... I'm just not at the point of PMing people or calling others.... if I hit that, I will... so don't worry. Okay....

 

[FyreBrigidIce]

It is normal for you to feel apprehensive around certain things.

I am in chat if you want to talk there.

Brandy

 

[Comet]

I think I'll join you birthday girl. My computer is being slow, but I'll be along shortly.

 

[Comet]

I retraced my steps to "bad places" as my shrink said to do.

Today a coworker said that somethng made them want to kill themselves. It was in a joking matter as I used to do the same.... I left. I guess it stuck with me though. Then my buddy meteor bought a new gun. Guns... not sure how to react to them yet.... So now we have:
1. Suicide
2. Gun

Then we move to me reading about death on RF in a thread.

1. Suicide
2. Gun
3. Death

Then I felt better watchng and playing with my cats. I even took a picture and sent it Then the song lyrics were about "If the feelings gone, words won't stop you anyway". No music has brought me back up, but it can bring you down too! Then I went to my balcony and there was a cop car sitting there! That brought me back to that night again as well.

1.Suicide 2. Gun 3. Death 4. Sad Song 5. Cops at my place

All things pointed me back to that night.... Plus for the past two days I've wanted to cry and I CAN NOT CRY! (thanks Brandy for letting me know I am not crazy and that YES indeed the meds do this to us!)

Okay, see I am bettering myself and improving my mood as well. Thanks for living through the bad times.... seems to be once a week is all

 

[FyreBrigidIce]

You are very welcome and I am glad to know that I am not the only one with trouble crying.

FBI

 

[Stellify]

Hey honey :hug:

Sorry I wasn't around earlier, but I'm glad it seems like you're feeling a little better.
I think it's good that you can trace your "down" feelings back to the things that kind of set them off throughout the day....For me, understanding "why" I was feeling down always helped me get a handle on things again.

My cat was cute today, too She decided to try and come sleep on my face for the first time since I gave her a bath a few days ago....I'm taking this as her forgiveness lol.

 

[Tikanis]

Everyone needs to talk and be listened too on occasions - glad you got response and some help here.

 

[Comet]

Hey honey :hug:

Sorry I wasn't around earlier, but I'm glad it seems like you're feeling a little better.
I think it's good that you can trace your "down" feelings back to the things that kind of set them off throughout the day....For me, understanding "why" I was feeling down always helped me get a handle on things again.

My cat was cute today, too She decided to try and come sleep on my face for the first time since I gave her a bath a few days ago....I'm taking this as her forgiveness lol.

Its not your fault so don't apologize! lol

It seemed to help to trace it back and to see how much some things still bother me. When they add up, I need to do something to stop more things from adding up and bringing me to a bad place. I'm sure the shrink and I will talk about that on Wednesday.

A bath! The only thing worse than the evil squirt bottle is bath time! My cats despise me giving them a bath. I guess I should be glad that two of them do nothing but lick themselves, each other, and me! The other one gets in the shower with me every morning. As soon as I turn off the water, she cries to be let in to play in the water!

 

[Comet]

Is it wrong of me to apologize? I mean about my attempt. I don't feel the need to apologize to all for it, it happened and something meaningful I meant to say but it escapes me now....

I apologized to my cats today for my attempt. I know others can relate to such feelings about that and pets. They don't seem to care, I'm sure they are just glad that I am still here. Life is funny....

I don't really know what I mean to say so I am just rambling. Its been a very quiet, reflectful day for me. I love the rain! It is raining now, I just sat outside and watched the robins jumping around in it.... funny the things I'd miss if I were gone, funny the things I love but forget to do more often.

 

[Stellify]

I don't think you need to apologize...Unless you FEEL you need to apologize. Who you apologize to is something that you kind of have to find out for yourself.

Of course your babies are still happy you're here!

I'm glad it's been such a quiet day for you. I love the rain It sounds like it must be beautiful where you live! I'm a tad jealous of you.
...I think that last sentence is a bit profound....I've thought about something similar for a while now, and it's led me to be a little more aware of the present and the good things it can bring

 

[Comet]

I did need to apologize.... I at least needed to to my cats. They depend on me, if I did die; I'd be letting them down. Pets understand so much, I know they understand too.... I had to apologize to them. It was a real apology though, not just a "sorry".

They understand and as I would to people, so I needed to to them. Wow two "to to"s I wrote there! My old English teacher is rolling over in her grave! God bless her! I'll dedicate my first book to her memory, perhaps it will be the one I write now.... nevermind, I'm in my own little world again.

I don't believe in the "now"/present. It is nothing but the past and I can prove it I won't bring you down though, you are such an upper for me! It is the "moment" though, that I understand indeed.

Sorry! HA HA HA! Many thoughts not understood completely there, that is why I apologize, not even for rambling

 

[Comet]

Hey all, my cats seem to know it is a bad time for me yet again.... they come and beg for attention... I am really having trouble finding a reason to live right now. I can list many reasons to, but....

Sorry. I'm just thinking about suicide again and should go to bed.