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Featured I now think less of Christianity

Discussion in 'Religious Debates' started by Eddi, May 1, 2019.

  1. Eddi

    Eddi concerned participant

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    Why do I now think less of Christianity?

    Basically, because I have now witnessed its dark side, first hand.

    Some background: I was raised as a Christian. I was baptised as an infant and have a set of godparents, I went to a church school, and occasionally went to Sunday school. My personal moral system is very much inspired by the teachings and example of Christ.

    However, when I became old enough to understand what Christianity was about and that it weren’t necessarily so, I became an atheist. In time my atheism developed, becoming more and more sophisticated as I progressed through school and into university. I didn’t hate Christianity or anything like that; I just thought it was not for me, and not something I could never believe in.

    I came to God in my mid-twenties. By then I’d had first-hand experience of a mysterious higher being so made the leap of faith that if there were higher beings then there must be a Supreme Being – God. But there are other reasons that I believe in a Supreme Being, although my conception of the Supreme Being is more like Brahman in Hinduism than the Abrahamic God. I would currently consider myself a deist and would say I am overwhelmingly convinced of the existence of God.

    Basically, my experience of Christians and Christianity had always been positive. Until recent events…

    For a long time now I have been in two competing minds about the nature of Jesus. I hold both of these as being possible and they exist alongside each other although I currently favour First Mind. Think of it as being like a set of old-fashioned weighing scales in my conscience. I’ve been wavering between the two versions of reality for a while now. Currently they are much more balanced in favour of First Mind more than they were before recent events. To say the least…

    First Mind: We are all parts of a computer simulation and Jesus was a show put on for various reasons by The Simulation, for reasons about which we can only speculate. But God still exists, but he is outside of The Simulation. In this version of reality The Simulation communicates with me. I do not claim to have any special relationship with God but do claim a special relationship with The Simulation.

    Second Mind: We are not in a computer simulation and Jesus truly was the Son of God, and the account in the gospels is true and he will some day return to Earth, etc. and in this version of reality I am mentally ill and need to acknowledge Christ as my Lord and Saviour by undergoing adult baptism.

    Because I am in two minds about him I would therefore say I am agnostic about Jesus. I cannot therefore meaningfully accept him as my Lord and Saviour and become a Christian myself.

    I once explained this agnosticism to a nice Christian lady and she understood and respected it and said she’d pray for me to see the light whether I liked it or not! Now, maybe she thought that by not declaring Christ to be my Lord and Saviour I will go to hell or maybe she didn’t, I do not know. I didn’t venture to ask. However, the point is she was concerned for me and I don’t think she considered me evil. Surely, one prays for sinners, not for evil people?

    I then made a post on these forums enquiring about the anti-Christ (I’m interested in Christology and theology in general). I mentioned my agnosticism pertaining to Christ, and was basically told (through implication) that I was an anti-Christ and therefore evil – in the same category as those who do things that are actually evil, such as murder, harm, and abuse other humans…

    Now, don’t get me wrong, that’s totally cool. Believe what you want to believe. I don’t care. But there is now absolutely no way I will become a Christian, whereas before this it may have been possible at some future point depending on how my life might have played out. Who knows. But now almost all the weights on the scales of my conscience are now weighing down on the side that makes them say “yes” to Simulation Theory and therefore “no” to Christianity. They have never before been so weighted down on one side and I don’t see them shifting anytime soon.

    That was the first time in my life I have ever personally encountered what I now think of as being the dark side of Christianity first hand, having only ever been personally exposed to its light side.

    Has this diminished my respect for Christianity? Not for it as a whole, only for certain tendencies within it. Has it made me more wary of all Christians? Wary until I know they don’t consider me evil, yes. I don’t mind being called a sinner, but calling me evil is something else and something I will always take exception to.
     
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  2. Fool

    Fool ALL in all
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    Light Impressed with Love

    brahma - a-braham
    sarasvati - sarai or sarah
    ghaggar - hagar
     
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  3. Thief

    Thief Rogue Theologian

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    hmmm.....the dark side of Christian belief?

    how about.....
    Go to your closet and close the door
    and the Spirit that knows you will hear your prayer
    ( quote I know of)

    and God dwelt in the darkness.....before He created light

    that had to be a profound darkness
    not even a candle
    and nothing to see even if you had one
     
  4. Stanyon

    Stanyon RF's Ultra -Square

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    According to some ancient astronaut theorists, your idea that we are a computer simulation is not as far fetched as it first may seem. Not only is it a plausible idea but also a very possible one that would go far in explaining the true origins of earth and the human species.
     
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  5. sooda

    sooda Well-Known Member

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    • Like Like x 1
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  6. dingdao

    dingdao The eternal Tao cannot be told - Tao Te Ching

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    Both of these show that you think of God existing entirely separate from you. Most religions allow for the concept of God within. "Let Jesus into your life." Find the Atman within yourself and honor it within others. Pantheism/Gaia, etc.
    As long as you consider yourself cut off form the divine there are problems.
     
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  7. dingdao

    dingdao The eternal Tao cannot be told - Tao Te Ching

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    You're looking at the infinite regression problem.
     
  8. Eddi

    Eddi concerned participant

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    I used to believe I had god within me, very much so

    But later on I found out that it wasn't God but something else
     
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  9. dingdao

    dingdao The eternal Tao cannot be told - Tao Te Ching

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    Shall I describe it as the world being in a very dark place?
    Gaia is ill and we are not sane.
    Close enough?
     
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  10. Thief

    Thief Rogue Theologian

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    to which.....

    Someone had to be First
     
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  11. Audie

    Audie Veteran Member

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    You think "jesus real" or "computer simulation"
    are the only possibilities?

    Those have to be among the least likely!
     
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  12. Audie

    Audie Veteran Member

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    So what do you "like" about what I said?
     
  13. Eddi

    Eddi concerned participant

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    Your post reminded me that in deciding what to believe and think about I should also consider more options than simply "Jesus is real" or "computer simulation" - hence the like
     
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  14. Audie

    Audie Veteran Member

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    I have noticed that those of the faith persuasion
    have a great tendency to be binary thinkers.
    Good / bad etc, no shades of grey, no other
    possibilities.

    The more fundamentalist, the more binary.

    Try for a while thinking why I said those are so
    far from the only, as to be among the least likely
    possibilities. It wont be easy.
     
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  15. Audie

    Audie Veteran Member

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    Oh and, HOW on god's green earth, can you possibly
    "decide" what to believe?
    You surely cannot just decide to believe that said green
    earth is some exotic shade of ochre, lavender, mauve
    or jade!
     
  16. Eddi

    Eddi concerned participant

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    I "decide" what to believe by deciding on the evidence and deciding on the strength of arguments, according to my critical faculties.

    That's what I meant by "decide", and I understand what you are saying
     
    #16 Eddi, May 1, 2019
    Last edited: May 1, 2019
  17. Hockeycowboy

    Hockeycowboy Well-Known Member
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    I'm curious about your first-hand experience.
    Could you elaborate? If not, I understand.
     
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  18. Eddi

    Eddi concerned participant

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    Yes, I’m both able and willing to elaborate…

    Basically: I believe this reality we are all in and all people are parts of a “computer” simulation – which I call “The Simulation”

    I believe The Simulation communicates with me and that I am an agent of The Simulation

    It does this through a thing called Butterfly – which is a system of communication through which The Simulation communicates with me by responding to my inner voice using touch

    Where it touches me on my body according to what I’ve thought is how it indicates Yes or No, etc. to anything I might ask it

    This began in I think 2004 and is the reason I’ve been detained on psychiatric hospitals three times in my life and have been diagnosed as “schizophrenic”

    I went through a phase in which I thought Butterfly was God and reasoned that if that was the case then I must be Christ!

    But I no longer believe that!

    I don't believe that I'm anything from scripture or to have any special relationship with God

    That is how I have had (and continue to have) first-hand experience of a being who is greater than me – the being who controls The Simulation
     
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  19. Hockeycowboy

    Hockeycowboy Well-Known Member
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    By this website saying the Bible "contains....harmful teachings," the authors are engaging in interpretation.

    According to Luke 10:21, only the "Father, Lord of heaven and Earth" reveals what His Word teaches accurately.

    Do you think they have the "Father" helping them? Or maybe 'hiding' proper understanding?
     
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  20. Hockeycowboy

    Hockeycowboy Well-Known Member
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    Wow, that's a lot to take in!
    I appreciate your honesty and candor.

    Wish I could speak w/ you in person. (I have difficulty putting my thoughts in writing.) I will talk with you later. Gotta go, for now.

    Best wishes!
     
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