I did relapse. I realized God is not going to give me the grace to stay sober if I keep blaspheming and mocking him
Sai Baba told me "you are an alcoholic". I don't like alcohol, so it's easy not to drink for me. But if Sai Baba tells me I'm alcoholic, there must be some truth in it, I figured (I take His advice serious). So I bought an electronic alcohol tester and lo and behold when I blew in it, it showed I was alcoholic. Took me not too long to figure out it might have to do with eating more than I can digest (addicted to over eating, so Him calling me alcoholic was quite true). So I reduced the amount I ate and when I blew 2 days later I was sober.
Then ca. 2 days later I was driving on the road and was stopped by police to check if I had been drinking (first time in my life). I told him the above story and said my tester said I was okay now, but was not too sure if that cheap tester was accurate. The police man even confirmed that this does indeed happen with some people. Luckily the alcohol tester of the police showed the same as mine.
If Sai Baba had not told me in the dream, I might have been in trouble that day. And I learned some good lessons.
So brother you are not the only one addicted to something. People point the finger to alcoholics easily, but forget 3 fingers point back. I don't see many people without any addiction. In my experience addiction is something emotional, and when you stop one addiction it will pop up somewhere else, and that will go on until "you fully love yourself". Because if you love yourself you will not harm yourself by "being addicted".
Suggestion: Shift your alcohol addiction to "mocking God" addiction. God can handle you mocking Him, and thereby rendering your new addiction quite harmless