Would You Love Someone Who Loved Their God More Than You?

[Sunstone]

Would you love, marry, and/or partner with someone who loved their god more than they loved you?


......
As for myself, I could see this going either way.

On the one hand, there is less chance than there is modesty in a public bathhouse on "Toweless Tuesdays" that I would allow myself to get involved with a fundamentalist who loved her deity even half as much as she loved me. Anything more than half as much as me would be profoundly foolish, I think, given what kind of disgusting deities fundamentalists as a group tend to have. At least, that's how I myself see their deities. It's like asking would I get involved with someone who loved Charles Manson more than me. Hell no!

But on the other hand, it might actually be desirable to get involved with someone who had a healthy notion of deity and who loved their god more than me. It's kind of like asking, "Would you get involved with someone who thought there were bigger, more meaningful things in this world than themselves and you." Of course I might!

Among other things, a sense of purpose, mission in life is hugely attractive in a partner. At the very least, it means they might not end up a couch potato.

But what about you? Would you get involved with someone who loved their god more than they loved you?



________________________
Here's a tune in a futile effort to make it up to you for such a lousy thread....

 

[Trailblazer]

Would you love, marry, and/or partner with someone who loved their god more than they loved you?

It is fine with me if my husband loves God more than me, because I think it is appropriate.

 

[Sunstone]

It is fine with me if my husband loves God more than me, because I think it is appropriate.

No more nuance than that? So what makes it appropriate?

 

[Hockeycowboy]

My Deity — Jehovah, Jesus’ God — actually requires that I love my wife as much as myself (Ephesians 5:28)....the only action that could separate us, would be adultery, and then only the innocent mate would have the right to end the marriage.

But if both spouses love Jehovah, both will be working hard at loving each other (Colossians 3:12-14), as required...and there’d never be adultery; each one would put the other’s interest first.

So, loving God first is actually a boon to my relationship!

 

[lewisnotmiller]

It's possible. Them loving someone more than me isn't the issue. For example, were I single, I could love a woman who had a child from a previous relationship, and would assume the child came first in her life.

It would be more around the practical impacts of the love, than the love itself.

 

[Trailblazer]

No more nuance than that? So what makes it appropriate?

Because God says His love cannot reach us unless we love Him.

4: O SON OF MAN! I loved thy creation, hence I created thee. Wherefore, do thou love Me, that I may name thy name and fill thy soul with the spirit of life.”

5: O SON OF BEING! Love Me, that I may love thee. If thou lovest Me not, My love can in no wise reach thee. Know this, O servant.
The Hidden Words of Bahá’u’lláh, p. 4

 

[Sunstone]

Because God says His love cannot reach us unless we love Him.

4: O SON OF MAN! I loved thy creation, hence I created thee. Wherefore, do thou love Me, that I may name thy name and fill thy soul with the spirit of life.”

5: O SON OF BEING! Love Me, that I may love thee. If thou lovest Me not, My love can in no wise reach thee. Know this, O servant.
The Hidden Words of Bahá’u’lláh, p. 4

Thanks for the clarification.

 

[Sunstone]

My Deity — Jehovah, Jesus’ God — actually requires that I love my wife as much as myself (Ephesians 5:28)....the only action that could separate us, would be adultery, and then only the innocent mate would have the right to end the marriage.

But if both spouses love Jehovah, both will be working hard at loving each other (Colossians 3:12-14), as required...and there’d never be adultery; each one would put the other’s interest first.

So, loving God is a boon to my relationship!

That has a kind of logic to it.

 

[Sunstone]

It's possible. Them loving someone more than me isn't the issue. For example, were I single, I could love a woman who had a child from a previous relationship, and would assume the child came first in her life.

That makes a lot of sense.

It would be more around the practical impacts of the love, than the love itself.

"Practical impacts?" Could you elaborate please?

 

[lewisnotmiller]

"Practical impacts?" Could you elaborate please?

Well, it could be a million things but...

How would we raise the kids?
Is she comfortable with me not loving God, or is she thinking I'd move to God based on her example?
If we married, how would that work?

Pretty much anything you can think of. But to me that's no different to me (as an atheist) loving any theist. This one would appear to be a true believer, which is a little easier in one sense (I don't like hypocrisy) but could impact on a lot of day to day things that...as a couple...we need to come to an accord on.

 

[Hockeycowboy]

That has a kind of logic to it.

I think so, too.

Because, we all fail...at times, selfishness (the opposite of love) comes out. If it’s their selfishness, your love for them may fail (a little). If it’s yours, their love may fail toward you, briefly.
But, putting God’s requirements first, and applying His counsel, you’ll value the relationship more...work harder.
Following Ephesians 4:26 has resulted in quite a few sleepless nights, but my wife and I are stronger than ever, together! Just got over a tiff, tonight, actually.

I find the Scriptures are so helpful.

 

[Cooky]

Would you love, marry, and/or partner with someone who loved their god more than they loved you?


......
As for myself, I could see this going either way.

On the one hand, there is less chance than there is modesty in a public bathhouse on "Toweless Tuesdays" that I would allow myself to get involved with a fundamentalist who loved her deity even half as much as she loved me. Anything more than half as much as me would be profoundly foolish, I think, given what kind of disgusting deities fundamentalists as a group tend to have. At least, that's how I myself see their deities. It's like asking would I get involved with someone who loved Charles Manson more than me. Hell no!

But on the other hand, it might actually be desirable to get involved with someone who had a healthy notion of deity and who loved their god more than me. It's kind of like asking, "Would you get involved with someone who thought there were bigger, more meaningful things in this world than themselves and you." Of course I might!

Among other things, a sense of purpose, mission in life is hugely attractive in a partner. At the very least, it means they might not end up a couch potato.

But what about you? Would you get involved with someone who loved their god more than they loved you?



________________________
Here's a tune in a futile effort to make it up to you for such a lousy thread....

Great jam..! But for the topic, I think there are different types of love, and for those who reach the point of Agape, the greatest of all loves, God and spousal love become equal, and become one in the same.

 

[Epic Beard Man]

If they love their deity more than me then they should be in some sort of reclusive monastery instead of a partnership.

 

[TransmutingSoul]

Would you love, marry, and/or partner with someone who loved their god more than they loved you

God is the focus of Love. It is God that gives the Love we can share with our partner.

It is a Love that can not be broken.

Regards Tony

 

[JJ50]

Anyone who loves a god, which probably doesn't exist, more than their partner or children is sick in the head.

 

[PureX]

Would you love, marry, and/or partner with someone who loved their god more than they loved you?


......
As for myself, I could see this going either way.

On the one hand, there is less chance than there is modesty in a public bathhouse on "Toweless Tuesdays" that I would allow myself to get involved with a fundamentalist who loved her deity even half as much as she loved me. Anything more than half as much as me would be profoundly foolish, I think, given what kind of disgusting deities fundamentalists as a group tend to have. At least, that's how I myself see their deities. It's like asking would I get involved with someone who loved Charles Manson more than me. Hell no!

But on the other hand, it might actually be desirable to get involved with someone who had a healthy notion of deity and who loved their god more than me. It's kind of like asking, "Would you get involved with someone who thought there were bigger, more meaningful things in this world than themselves and you." Of course I might!

Among other things, a sense of purpose, mission in life is hugely attractive in a partner. At the very least, it means they might not end up a couch potato.

But what about you? Would you get involved with someone who loved their god more than they loved you?

I agree, and for these same reasons. But I would add that ultimately it does not have to be an 'either/or' scenario. That is that I, or they, could see the reflection of God within our partner, so that to love this God is to love each other. They are not two differing or opposing forms or expressions of love. They are the same love for two different manifestations of The Divine Being.

 

[Erebus]

I don't need to be loved above everything else to love somebody in return. Love is often unequal, I love my brother more than I love my friends for example, but that doesn't diminish the fact that I still love my friends. If the primary focus of somebody's love is their god/s then that's not necessarily a deal-breaker. However, the way that love manifests and what else goes with it might make things difficult.

Does their love for their god mean that they consider gay people to be an abomination? Do they believe that eternal torture is just and proper? Do they hold disbelief or the worship of other gods to be sins worthy of damnation?

Those are just a few of the possible views that I personally find utterly abhorrent. I'm not sure that it would be possible for me to truly love somebody who holds those opinions, particularly if they act on those beliefs (for example, by protesting a gay pride parade and telling the people there that they're damned).

 

[dianaiad]

Would you love, marry, and/or partner with someone who loved their god more than they loved you?


......
As for myself, I could see this going either way.

On the one hand, there is less chance than there is modesty in a public bathhouse on "Toweless Tuesdays" that I would allow myself to get involved with a fundamentalist who loved her deity even half as much as she loved me. Anything more than half as much as me would be profoundly foolish, I think, given what kind of disgusting deities fundamentalists as a group tend to have. At least, that's how I myself see their deities. It's like asking would I get involved with someone who loved Charles Manson more than me. Hell no!

But on the other hand, it might actually be desirable to get involved with someone who had a healthy notion of deity and who loved their god more than me. It's kind of like asking, "Would you get involved with someone who thought there were bigger, more meaningful things in this world than themselves and you." Of course I might!

Among other things, a sense of purpose, mission in life is hugely attractive in a partner. At the very least, it means they might not end up a couch potato.

But what about you? Would you get involved with someone who loved their god more than they loved you?



________________________
Here's a tune in a futile effort to make it up to you for such a lousy thread....

Depends entirely on the God he loves. If it is the 'same God" I do (or rather, the same version of Him) that would be fine. We would both be loving God more than anything....and in our case, loving Him means loving each other and loving our family more than anything on earth. The understanding is, God WANTS that from us. He wouldn't tell us to hurt one another or our families, because if He did say that, He wouldn't BE God.

On the other hand, should He tell one of us to leave for awhile, (like go "a-missionarying" ...proselyting or service) then the other one will either support, or 'go with.' Bringing the kids if necessary.

I mean, really; if one's nation can demand that sort of separation, one can't get upset if God does, once in awhile.

The idea behind this is that the deity one has faith in is supposed to have our best interests, and the interests of our family and people, at heart.

I don't think I could live with (Love is a different matter) someone who, not sharing my beliefs, loved HIS God more than he loves me. That would be too unequal even for me.

 

[beenherebeforeagain]

For a time...a long time, in fact, I was married to a woman who loved herself much more than me, or anyone else, as far as I can tell now. Having gone through that experience, loving anyone who loves someone/something other than you more than they love you...well, I recommend against it. I spent years trying to be happy, before I eventually came to realize that I did not come first on her list, while pretty much she had been #1 on mine...hence, why I moved out and filed for divorce.

 

[Phaedrus]

No, I couldn't love someone who loved an imaginary being more than me.