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VoidCat
Pronouns: he/him/they/them
People who are purposely bullies
Absolutely nothing.
Who am I to tell others how to feel?
Spirit of Light
Be who ever you want
I used to be easy offended before, but luckely i have managed to turn it to not feeling offended toward mostly everything. Not sure what if something offend me now.
Sufism do teach me to be open minded and tolerant and this has helped me a lot
Heyo
Veteran Member
When people think I'm stupid.
(Though that is often not easily determined. Some people are so stupid, they don't recognize how stupid they are. See Dunning-Kruger-effect.)
I have no religion and do not subscribe to only one philosophy. Regarding offence, I try to be a Stoic. If I get offended, and recognize it, I think that I have a weak spot that requires mending.
Yep.
1. People using their phones when I'm trying to talk to them. Instant conversation ender, and often the end of invitations to my house(or the accepting of invitations to theirs).
2. Good question. There aren't any real 'cut and dried, this is this and that is that' in my religion. It would advise a calm and detached approach, however. Perhaps reflection on why one is offended, and what one should do about it.
3. It depends. I don't usually share much time with easily offended people, as they tend to be negative and unpleasant. Its not that one should never feel offended, but when someone is ticked off about every last thing... well, I"m sure they're lovely people, but I just don't have the temperament for handling it.
2. Good question. There aren't any real 'cut and dried, this is this and that is that' in my religion. It would advise a calm and detached approach, however. Perhaps reflection on why one is offended, and what one should do about it.
3. It depends. I don't usually share much time with easily offended people, as they tend to be negative and unpleasant. Its not that one should never feel offended, but when someone is ticked off about every last thing... well, I"m sure they're lovely people, but I just don't have the temperament for handling it.
Nothing.
Don’t take anything personally. Nothing that others say or do is because of me. It is a projection of their own reality. It’s my choice if I want to bring their projection into my own reality.
It’s up to the individual if they choose to be offended. It’s not for me to tell others how they should react to something said or done.
Altfish
Veteran Member
People who wear hats/hoodies indoors or in cars.
If I'm offended, that's ok
Yes
Aye, people being mean...they suck.
Taking offense is a choice one makes,
one made too easily & carelessly by many.
I'll have you know I'm offending you right now. (Its friggin' cold in here. I'm not taking this hoodie off.)
anna.
but mostly it's the same
Cruelty
I can see hats in houses, but in cars? Is that an etiquette thing where you live? Typically, if one wears a hat outside where I am, if they get in a car, they don’t remove it.
Also, I wasn’t wearing a hat when I started participating in this thread, but I’m wearing one now, because I can be a jerk like that.
On a personal level, not much. If someone comes up with something I don't like, I just turn around and leave. They can enjoy having a monologue.
I can't remember if the Bible says something specifically about being offended, but there are a number of scriptures that give good advice about dealing with others that I like to apply.
Depends. Some people are right in feeling offended. For example if someone is being abusive, racist, violent, etc. Those are good reasons to feel offended. But there is a culture today that promotes a "everything I don't like is offensive" rhetoric and I find that too much. Many hide behind that idea instead of facing their challenges.
My religion tells to turn the other cheek.
Unveiled Artist
Veteran Member
When its something personal-religion, identity, loved ones, one's ego, their chosen lifestyle, their culture and community, as well as their beliefs and values are threatened or challenged, it is natural to be offensive.
The problem is how do you handle the offensiveness. I don't see a need to try to suppress it with religious practices. That's like telling our body we're not supposed to act this way just that. Suppressing the laws of nature. Instead, how do we change our actions because of offensiveness. How do we tell our bodies and minds that someone offending you is not a threat to your life (as our brains think it is) but a perceived threat that can be remedied by challenging the cognitive distortions.
I do see a value in noting one is offended. However, always letting the brain react every time its offended could lead to excess and narrow mindedness. Perhaps one is offended by @SalixIncendium 's fashion sense. Before reacting, one could ask "is this really my business? Is this really hurting anything?" If not, it just causes grief to react. However, if one is offended because the neighbor is kicking his dog, that's another story. Perhaps action is better here, but then again, one must stop and review what kind of action is best.
It isn't always bad to react. Its just best to try to think it out first, if the opportunity is available(and it usually is).
I am difficult to offend, there a a few things that tick me off but no offence taken.
Not a lot
Some are.
Yazata
Active Member
I guess that in my personal case I'm most put off by hypocrisy. By people who apply a different standard to others than they apply to themselves and those they identify with.
I generally tolerate disagreement well. I can even withstand other people's negative moral judgments. But when I sense that they are guilty of precisely the same faults that they accuse me of, and even applaud those faults as if they are actually virtues in them and theirs, I start to get angry.
That anger is not a 'skillful' response in these kinds of situations.
Generally speaking, yes. In this day and age, being offended is used like some kind of weapon to control the behavior of other people.
You must do nothing to offend me!! "Microaggressions!"
Inevitably, while they are doing their very utmost to offend you. (You of course deserve it.)
It's all an assertion of the imagined/desired power hierarchy between them and you. They perceive themselves as the righteous ones.
I feel no obligation to submit to it.
My instinct is that reciprocity is fundamental in human relationships. (The 'Golden Rule' thing.) I take care not to cause other people unnecessary suffering. And I expect them to treat me the same way. When other people refuse to take any cognizance of my feelings while demanding that their own feelings control our relationship, then I start to think that they are people best avoided.
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Unveiled Artist
Veteran Member
That makes it seem reacting is a choice. It's separating human instinct as though we have some control over our neurology and physiological brain/body.
For example, if I hit you, your automatic reaction may be one to block or two to fight back. After that, you can decide whether to keep on fighting, run, or talk it out but that initial reaction is natural.
Likewise with mental, if I said "you father is stupid" your automatic reaction (depending on your relations) may be to either be silent (flight), say no he's not (defend), or attack (but yours is too).
Maybe a better idea than trying to control automatic mental and physical reactions on the spot, prepare oneself for physical and mental challenges so when we do experience reactions (fear or defensiveness), we recognize it on the spot-not suppress it-and find tools to relieve the reaction not try to control it.
Think of meditation. If you're sitting and distractions come up, you can't control the distractions. You can either a. fight it by trying to get it out of your head. b. ignore it or flying from it or c. develop ways to reflect and use it for better meditation sessions.
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Heyo
Veteran Member
You mean, giving the Scottish salute?My religion tells to turn the other cheek.
