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Scientists Prove Atheists Are Terrorists

Discussion in 'Games / Pics / Jokes / Stories' started by ImmortalFlame, Aug 23, 2019.

  1. ImmortalFlame

    ImmortalFlame Well-Known Member

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    A recent study proves atheists are agents of terror and seek to obtain their goals through that terror. The paper titled Atheists are Agents of Terror and Obtain Their Goals Through Terror is in this month’s prestigious Journal of CryptoKnowology.

    ”We have Saudi Arabia to thank for leading the way on the atheist-terrorist connection,” lead author Professor Andrew Canard quipped. “The only thing we did was connect the dots.”

    The researchers did not engage in any original experiments. Instead, they focused on conducting a meta-analysis of existing studies using the best statistical methods. Scientists on the team utilized both addition and subtraction.

    “Sometimes we had to use both hands, too,” stated Professor Canard.​

    SOURCE: Scientists Prove Atheists Are Terrorists

    I, for one, am glad this is finally out in the open. I was getting tired of being a closeted terrorist all this time.
     
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  2. Darkforbid

    Darkforbid Well-Known Member

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  3. Valjean

    Valjean Veteran Member
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  4. ImmortalFlame

    ImmortalFlame Well-Known Member

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    I suggest we use this thread to post a mixture of satirical and serious articles that make ridiculous claims, and try to see if we can tell the difference between them.
     
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  5. Erebus

    Erebus Well-Known Member

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    I have mixed feelings about this being scientifically proven.

    Atheists are very obviously morally bankrupt criminal terrorists. That's common knowledge. The problem is that science is also morally bankrupt and exists solely as a test of faith.

    I'm having existential problems right now.
     
  6. sooda

    sooda Veteran Member
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  7. Nimos

    Nimos Active Member

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    Dammit they figured it out....!!! Can't believe they cracked it "utilized both addition and subtraction." I thought our plan was more solid than that!!
     
  8. ImmortalFlame

    ImmortalFlame Well-Known Member

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    At least we gave them a run for their money. They had to use both hands, after all.
     
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  9. Wu Wei

    Wu Wei ursus senum severiorum and ex-Bisy Backson

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    Well then that proves it, the KKK which is based in a local type of Protestantism can't be domestic terrorist then, and many Nazis can't be either.... :confused::rolleyes:
     
  10. ecco

    ecco Well-Known Member

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    It might be funny over here, but I can see Islamic countries using it to control and punish atheists in Islamic areas.
     
  11. bobhikes

    bobhikes Nowoligist
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    Yes its funny but its also sad. Scientists are using meta-analysis of existing studies to support there science when paid for by a client. There's lies, damn lies and statistics. We need to add and worst of all meta-analysis of statistics.
     
  12. sun rise

    sun rise "Let there be peace and love among all"
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    There's only one response that I can make in this thread:

     
  13. ecco

    ecco Well-Known Member

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    I suggest researching: Professor Andrew Canard.
     
  14. ChristineM

    ChristineM "Be strong" I whispered to my coffee.
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    Or known to his friends as Doctor Duck
     
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