Is Marriage a Necessity?

[Somkid]

Not where I live but then again people don't really judge others here they tend to mind their own business and not say anything unkind.

 

[Reverend Rick]

It has never occurred to me that people get married for the benefits. I would think that two people in love would get married in spite of the benefits. I would think two people in love would pay a penalty to get married because their love is all that is really important.

 

[Draka]

It has never occurred to me that people get married for the benefits. I would think that two people in love would get married in spite of the benefits. I would think two people in love would pay a penalty to get married because their love is all that is really important.

But if their love is all that is important then why the urgency or need to get married? If the love is not there in the first place then getting married isn't going to change that. And if two people are in love and happy with their relationship the way it is, then unless for legal benefits, why get legally married?

 

[trinity2359]

I think people socially need to have their permanent relationship recognized and a legal marriage gives an easily accessable mechanism to accomplish that. Then there is no disagreement with any secular or social context that these two (or whatever...) people are indeed committed.

 

[blackout]

Nope. I think marriage sets up all kinds of divisive mindsets.

Love should be enough.

Love is enough when we allow it to be.

 

[sandandfoam]

Do the ring and the paper really matter?

They do when one of a couple dies.
Spend your life with someone and then have no rights because no legal relationship exists.

 

[blackout]

They do when one of a couple dies.
Spend your life with someone and then have no rights because no legal relationship exists.

Yes. Well govt. is the problem there.
Contracts between parties should not be limited in any way.

But a contract is not a marriage.
It is an agreement of rights and property.

Yes, well then I guess marriage is in-deed a contract.

Guess that's why I'm not so crazy about it all.

Free Love baby!
Love cannot be secured by contract. ever.

 

[Draka]

They do when one of a couple dies.
Spend your life with someone and then have no rights because no legal relationship exists.

As for obtaining certain rights and such, I have said that is what a marriage is for. I also believe that anyone that wishes to get married should be legally able to.

I guess mainly my issue in this whole thing is not the legalities. If you don't pay attention to the "business" of being married and just think about the relationship itself.

Do you think it is necessary for a couple to be legally married in order to have a successful relationship? Does being married somehow really make things better in the relationship itself? If a couple isn't married does it really say anything about their commitment level? And vice versa...just because a couple is married does it say that they are really that much more commited to each other than a couple that isn't married?

With adultery and divorce rates being what they are I just don't see marrigae being some magical thing that gaurantees a long lasting commited relationship. Either you have it or you don't regardless of the paperwork involved.

 

[Yeshua_Lives]

I'm talking legal marriage here. Do you feel that it is a necessary thing to have when dealing with family or sexual relations? Must two people be married to have children? To have sex? Is legal marriage a requirement for a commited couple in your opinion, or would just the personal commitment between the two be good enough in your eyes?

Do the ring and the paper really matter?

Personal commitment between two is all it really takes. Seems that all the marriage stuff is for everyone else.....A big show.

ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE.....EVERYBODY NOW.
ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE....LOVE.....LOVE IS ALL YOU NEED.
LOVE IS ALL YOU NEED.

 

[Nanda]

My husband and I started our family before we got married; so did my parents, for that matter. In both cases, the marriage was more about the legal benefits than cementing the relationship; as far as we were concerned, we'd already made the commitment to each other, and legal aspect was pretty superfluous.

 

[sandandfoam]

My husband and I started our family before we got married; so did my parents, for that matter. In both cases, the marriage was more about the legal benefits than cementing the relationship; as far as we were concerned, we'd already made the commitment to each other, and legal aspect was pretty superfluous.

We're in the same boat.

 

[Nanda]

We're in the same boat.

*hands you a paddle*

 

[Starfish]

I'm talking legal marriage here. Do you feel that it is a necessary thing to have when dealing with family or sexual relations? Must two people be married to have children? To have sex? Is legal marriage a requirement for a commited couple in your opinion, or would just the personal commitment between the two be good enough in your eyes?

Do the ring and the paper really matter?

Draka, I wondering why you are asking this. You don't believe marriage is important and when someone disagrees with you (in another thread), you've gotten very defensive and taken it very personally. Are you wanting to be convinced or just argue your side somemore?

The Christian, Biblical answer to your question is yes. Having said that, please don't take my opinion as a personal attack. I realize you've had a hard life and very bad experiences with marriage. Yet, there is a reason for marriage, and it has tremendous value to the couple, their children, and society.

 

[Draka]

Draka, I wondering why you are asking this. You don't believe marriage is important and when someone disagrees with you (in another thread), you've gotten very defensive and taken it very personally. Are you wanting to be convinced or just argue your side somemore?

The Christian, Biblical answer to your question is yes. Having said that, please don't take my opinion as a personal attack. I realize you've had a hard life and very bad experiences with marriage. Yet, there is a reason for marriage, and it has tremendous value to the couple, their children, and society.

This thread is a bit old now first off. Your comments sparked me into wondering just how most people felt about this subject. As for me taking it personally...well, how am I suppose to take it when someone says that all unmarried women should give up their children for adoption and then when confronted with the fact that I am unmarried tells me to get married TODAY and brings into question the commitment and sincerity of my relationship without knowing jack-squat about me?

Your posts and comments to me seemed a bit on the extreme side and so I started this thread to get others' reactions to the issue in general about the necessity of marriage. As for marriage being the "Christian" thing, it appears that there have been some Christians that fall on my side of this issue as well.

Aside from legal benefits that are part of the government contract that is marriage, just what ARE the "tremendous values" that marriage provides the couple, the children and society?

Aside from legal benefits how does whether a commited couple being married or not affect their children?

If a couple is already in a loving and commited relationship then what "values" does a marriage bring?

How, besides honoring legal benefits, does someone's marriage affect society?

 

[Don Penguinoini]

I think marriage puts a relationship on another level, it requires more commitment, whereas girfirend boyfreind dont need divorce papers.

 

[Starfish]

This thread is a bit old now first off. Your comments sparked me into wondering just how most people felt about this subject. As for me taking it personally...well, how am I suppose to take it when someone says that all unmarried women should give up their children for adoption and then when confronted with the fact that I am unmarried tells me to get married TODAY and brings into question the commitment and sincerity of my relationship without knowing jack-squat about me?

Your posts and comments to me seemed a bit on the extreme side and so I started this thread to get others' reactions to the issue in general about the necessity of marriage. As for marriage being the "Christian" thing, it appears that there have been some Christians that fall on my side of this issue as well.

Aside from legal benefits that are part of the government contract that is marriage, just what ARE the "tremendous values" that marriage provides the couple, the children and society?

Aside from legal benefits how does whether a commited couple being married or not affect their children?

If a couple is already in a loving and commited relationship then what "values" does a marriage bring?

How, besides honoring legal benefits, does someone's marriage affect society?

Well, Okay. You already know how I feel, so I'll sit this one out. Best wishes for a productive debate.

 

[Don Penguinoini]

I don't can you share?

 

[Starfish]

I don't can you share?

Sorry. Reading through this thread, I see my opinion is in the minority here, and my experience with RF has been enough to teach me that some battles in some arenas are not worth fighting.

 

[Draka]

Well, Okay. You already know how I feel, so I'll sit this one out. Best wishes for a productive debate.

Sorry, but that seems like a cop out to me. You make these statements about certain "tremendous values" but then fail to name any of these so-called values. You may have stated how you feel, but you have given no basis as to the WHY.

 

[Starfish]

Sorry, but that seems like a cop out to me. You make these statements about certain "tremendous values" but then fail to name any of these so-called values. You may have stated how you feel, but you have given no basis as to the WHY.

Go back to the other thread. I'm just not willing to be a punching bag here.