3 real scenarios.
I am a technician I have to work with operator's on a day basis, I try to be very friendly and legitimately take an interest in other's life. I find people extremely interesting.
1) Younger I was working at a large company. A female there was an immigrant from Lithuanian. My Grandfather was from Lithuanian we got along well. Everyone there knew I was married, she approach me and offered to be my girl friend knowing I had a wife. When I turned her down politely she never spoke to me again. Do I need to change who I am?
2) At my current job most of the people speak another language a Nigerian woman started working there. I was amazed at how good her English was only to find out Nigerians all speak english. She had a problem where she lost her car. The person that was supposed to take her to lunch never showed. I took her to lunch and paid. The guys at work start asking me if I was going to do something with her. I was shocked. She and I are still friendly but I am now subconscious of the others, I do not need rumors.
3)At my current job another women has a daughter about the same age as my son's there is a language barrier but I speak some. She started acting weird around me and I noticed but didn't put it together. At one point she asked me why I spoke her language was is friends, I said no it was my wife. Her eyes dropped and she walked away. I realized then that she had other interests for me. Fortunately she got over it and we are still friendly.
4) Suppose I'm a gay man in a bar and a women comes up to me. We share stories and have a good time together we go out for coffee or other friendly things a few times. After the 3rd date she declares feelings for me, I advise her that I am only seeking friendship and that I am gay, does she have the right to get mad or try and force me to be something I am not.
My personal views are deep and mine, if I don't enforce them on you and am still friendly with you knowing your views are different from mine, why am I the bigot? In debate on the RF if I don't share your views it seems like a lot of people take it personally and declare I am the bigot. To make progress for your issues I would suggest that you don't focus on the personal issue.
I am a technician I have to work with operator's on a day basis, I try to be very friendly and legitimately take an interest in other's life. I find people extremely interesting.
1) Younger I was working at a large company. A female there was an immigrant from Lithuanian. My Grandfather was from Lithuanian we got along well. Everyone there knew I was married, she approach me and offered to be my girl friend knowing I had a wife. When I turned her down politely she never spoke to me again. Do I need to change who I am?
2) At my current job most of the people speak another language a Nigerian woman started working there. I was amazed at how good her English was only to find out Nigerians all speak english. She had a problem where she lost her car. The person that was supposed to take her to lunch never showed. I took her to lunch and paid. The guys at work start asking me if I was going to do something with her. I was shocked. She and I are still friendly but I am now subconscious of the others, I do not need rumors.
3)At my current job another women has a daughter about the same age as my son's there is a language barrier but I speak some. She started acting weird around me and I noticed but didn't put it together. At one point she asked me why I spoke her language was is friends, I said no it was my wife. Her eyes dropped and she walked away. I realized then that she had other interests for me. Fortunately she got over it and we are still friendly.
4) Suppose I'm a gay man in a bar and a women comes up to me. We share stories and have a good time together we go out for coffee or other friendly things a few times. After the 3rd date she declares feelings for me, I advise her that I am only seeking friendship and that I am gay, does she have the right to get mad or try and force me to be something I am not.
My personal views are deep and mine, if I don't enforce them on you and am still friendly with you knowing your views are different from mine, why am I the bigot? In debate on the RF if I don't share your views it seems like a lot of people take it personally and declare I am the bigot. To make progress for your issues I would suggest that you don't focus on the personal issue.