Why are people happier when they serve and less satisfied when selfish?

[whirlingmerc]

Are we designed that way?

 

[lovesong]

Are they though? I'm not so sure.

 

[George-ananda]

I think it is because the core of all of us is ONE/God/Brahman. Selfishness goes against our core nature and feeds fear, aggression, etc. which makes us less happy and secure.

 

[Vinayaka]

I think some are, some aren't. There are the givers and the takers, the helpers, and the helped. Generally it takes something quite drastic to really figure out who is who, like seeing a drowning child going by in a river.

 

[Ouroboros]

I'm a stay at home dad. I only serve my dogs and cook food for my kids occasionally. The kids serve themselves when the food is ready. Other than that, I'm in full control everything that I do.

And I'm happy.

Is there any research done on this, or is it just a unsupported claim? Are people in general happier when they serve than being selfish?

Here's an article that claims otherwise: http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-20550/why-selfish-people-are-happier-healthier.html

 

[Quagmire]

I think it's because if we aren't serving other people, we're usually busy serving our own egos, and the ego's never satisfied, always wants the "next thing", or more of the last thing, or that thing over there . . .

Not that people are any different, it's just that it's easier to tell them to shut up.

 

[Sunstone]

Not everyone is happier serving others than their own self-interests, but I think -- from what psychology I've read on the subject -- that most people are. I suspect it has much to do with our being social animals.

 

[LuisDantas]

One reason is simply because having the means and the will to serve means that we have a degree of autonomy that is reassuring.

 

[Valjean]

It's selective -- at least it was for the last few million years. Living in co-operative tribes got us through the Pleistocene. In-tribe altruism is hard-wired into us. We're happiest as contributing members of a group.

 

[Aiviu]

The servant seeks it in the spirit while the selfish seeks in the world.
What the servants find in their spirit the selfish tries to convert the world into.

Needless to say, many different people with many different personal believes is a "big problem" for them to put it to the world what origins in everyones spirit. Their selfishness tries it in killings and rules. In my eyes, its the desired false interpretation of God to take self judgement into action against others.

 

[Ana.J]

Yes, we are designed to be happy when we are useful for the community, contribute our labour and serve the people.

 

[Valjean]

Yes, we are designed to be happy when we are useful for the community, contribute our labour and serve the people.

"The Community" being our own tribe or in-group, however. We did not evolve to function in large, civilised communities, or to extend moral consideration beyond our own tribe. We're also happy to compete with or war on The Other.

 

[Ana.J]

"The Community" being our own tribe or in-group, however. We did not evolve to function in large, civilised communities, or to extend moral consideration beyond our own tribe. We're also happy to compete with or war on The Other.

Well, I am not happy to be on war with anyone. Competition is not something I enjoy as well....

 

[Kilgore Trout]

If serving others makes us happy, then by serving others we are also serving ourselves. Acts are never truly selfless, as they always also serve our own needs as well - be it improving our emotional state, supporting our self-image, gaining the acceptance/admiration of others, etc.

 

[Valjean]

Well, I am not happy to be on war with anyone. Competition is not something I enjoy as well....

Humans will fight just for the love of fighting. Apparently the stimulus is irresistable, particularly among young males.
We can see it today in team sports fans, who enthusiastically support the in-team, even when it's indistinguishable from the competing team. Victory confers no benefit to the tribe, yet fans are frequently aggressive toward fans of the opposing team -- for no logical reason.

Our species is hard-wired for out-group aggression. It excites us. It binds us together. It gives us purpose.
If no goods, territory or women are to be gained, we'll still create rivalries and skirmish just for the fun of it. Battlefield or stadium -- same-same.

 

[buddhist]

As the Buddha taught, attachment (e.g. selfishness) breeds dukkha and dissatisfaction. Detachment (e.g. serving others/generosity) multiplies sukkha and contentment.

 

[ArtieE]

Humans will fight just for the love of fighting. Apparently the stimulus is irresistable, particularly among young males.
We can see it today in team sports fans, who enthusiastically support the in-team, even when it's indistinguishable from the competing team. Victory confers no benefit to the tribe, yet fans are frequently aggressive toward fans of the opposing team -- for no logical reason.

Our species is hard-wired for out-group aggression. It excites us. It binds us together. It gives us purpose.
If no goods, territory or women are to be gained, we'll still create rivalries and skirmish just for the fun of it. Battlefield or stadium -- same-same.

"bullying is motivated by a neurological disorder, whereby the brain activates a reward response to aggressive activity." http://www.independent.co.uk/news/s...-from-aggression-study-suggests-a7114371.html

 

[Valjean]

Bullying and aggression are a common feature in Hominids. Great apes are hierarchical and the alpha male achieves his position by aggression.
Dysfunctional though it may be, bullying is not a neurological "disorder." It may be atavistic and currently dysfunctional, but it's normal Hominen psychology.

 

[viole]

Are we designed that way?

If anyone wants to boost his happiness, I am ready to give him my Swiss bank account and the opportunity to help me buy a brand new Ferrari.

I offer this with the sole intent to help people feeling happier.

Ciao

- viole