Why are American beauty standards so ridiculous?

[T-Dawg]

Ok, so yesterday,, my cousins and some second cousins I've never met before in my life and I were watching some music video (the new Britney Spears video I think; one of them wanted to see if it was any good). At one point, one of the second cousins (a male of about 10-12 years old) commented on how Britney was fat.

***?!? THAT GIRL, FAT??? My cousin (male, a month or so younger than I) said that she wasn't "fat," just "chunky," pausing the video and picking out spots of "flab."

So the point is... are American beauty standards normally this ridiculous? If Britney Spears is fat, what would a common, everyday girl be? How do girls feel about having to put up with an increasingly thinning standard that's biologically impossible to attain without hurting yourself?

Do all places in the world treat women like this?

PS: Why does everyone hate Britney Spears, anyway? Did she do something?

 

[MissAlice]

It's definitely hard.

I don't know what it's like to be a guy but the feeling I get is guys like their women hotter than we like our men. I'm not saying guys are all like this but it's the perception I get.

The last I guy I dated did nothing but criticize me about my appearance. Since then, it's been very hard for me to date or even want a relationship amongst other issues I have such as crappy social skills. I tend to notice on TV men don't necessarily have to look good to play a lead character whether in a relationship or not. With women, when you see any leads they all look pretty much attractive.

But I don't know if this is just an american thing as far as the standards of women in society go...

 

[Storm]

So the point is... are American beauty standards normally this ridiculous?

Yep.

If Britney Spears is fat, what would a common, everyday girl be?

"Grossly fat."

How do girls feel about having to put up with an increasingly thinning standard that's biologically impossible to attain without hurting yourself?

Can't speak for others, but I'm rather ****** about it.

Do all places in the world treat women like this?

I don't think so. I've heard Europe is better, and I've heard "fat" as a compliment in Native culture (though they struggle with the same issues).

PS: Why does everyone hate Britney Spears, anyway? Did she do something?

She was wildly, undeservedly successful, then she went crazy. The first part made a lot of people resent her, which made the crazy stage bring out their sadistic streaks. It's complicated.

 

[Storm]

It's definitely hard.

I don't know what it's like to be a guy but the feeling I get is guys like their women hotter than we like our men. I'm not saying guys are all like this but it's the perception I get.

The last I guy I dated did nothing but criticize me about my appearance. Since then, it's been very hard for me to date or even want a relationship amongst other issues I have such as crappy social skills. I tend to notice on TV men don't necessarily have to look good to play a lead character whether in a relationship or not. With women, when you see any leads they all look pretty much attractive.

But I don't know if this is just an american thing as far as the standards of women in society go...

That guy was just an ***hole, then. There are decent ones out there, but they tend to be shy.

 

[MissAlice]

I notice too that the public tends to be more forgiving of men than women when it comes to ******* their lives up.

It still seems to be more acceptable for guys to be sleeping around and using drugs but when you hear about people like Britney or Amy Winehouse, they're either sluts or crack whores. I'm not saying that this is the cause of sexism but that men and women tend to be more accepting towards a guy's mistakes than a woman's.

 

[MissAlice]

That guy was just an ***hole, then. There are decent ones out there, but they tend to be shy.

Thanks Storm.

It's still hard for me to open up or feel comfortable around guys so I know most of it's my fault.

 

[Storm]

I notice too that the public tends to be more forgiving of men than women when it comes to ******* their lives up.

It still seems to be more acceptable for guys to be sleeping around and using drugs but when you hear about people like Britney or Amy Winehouse, they're either sluts or crack whores. I'm not saying that this is the cause of sexism but that men and women tend to be more accepting towards a guy's mistakes than a woman's.

QFT. Frubals.

 

[Shadow Wolf]

Teenage girls and young adult women are known for having self esteem issues because of the flawed expectations of "beauty and attractiveness" in America. Even eating disorders such as Anorexia and Bulimia are occurring more frequently because of unrealistic standards of thinness that most do not realize are actually very unhealthy for people who are not genetically designed to be of such a small frame.

 

[Nepenthe]

I don't think so. I've heard Europe is better, and I've heard "fat" as a compliment in Native culture (though they struggle with the same issues).

I'd say Europe for the most part is as bad if not worse in unrealistic or unhealthy standards of beauty for women (and men). As much as Europeans would love to claim otherwise, they share (and often introduce to the states) a concept of beauty in pop culture, commercials and advertising in general that sets the standard for beauty that emphasizes thin tall women and lighter skin. Just one recent example, cosmetics companies like L'Oreal, Avon, Garnier, Vichy marketed their Fair and Lovely skin cream towards Indian and Pakistani women in the U.K. (and India) with the claim that making their skin whiter would make their job prospects that much better.
U.K. ad:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIUQ5hbRHXk&feature=player_embedded
And the Indian ad:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-9tcXpW1DE&feature=player_embedded
In my admittedly anecdotal experiences Eastern European concepts of beauty also celebrate the tall/thin/Eurocentric standards that Americans adopted.

 

[Storm]

I'd say Europe for the most part is as bad if not worse in unrealistic or unhealthy standards of beauty for women (and men). As much as Europeans would love to claim otherwise, they share (and often introduce to the states) a concept of beauty in pop culture, comercials and advertising in general that sets the standard for concepts of beauty that emphasize thin tall women and lighter skin. Just one recent example, cosmetics companies like L'Oreal, Avon, Garnier, Vichy marketed their Fair and Lovely skin cream towards Indian and Pakistani women in the U.K. (and India) to make their skin whiter so their job prospects would be better.
U.K. ad:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIUQ5hbRHXk&feature=player_embedded
And the Indian ad:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-9tcXpW1DE&feature=player_embedded
In my admittedly anecdotal experiences Eastern European concepts of beauty also celebrate the tall/thin/Eurocentric standards that Americans adopted.

Thanks for the info.

 

[monta]

I'd say Europe for the most part is as bad if not worse in unrealistic or unhealthy standards of beauty for women (and men). As much as Europeans would love to claim otherwise, they share (and often introduce to the states) a concept of beauty in pop culture, commercials and advertising in general that sets the standard for beauty that emphasizes thin tall women and lighter skin. Just one recent example, cosmetics companies like L'Oreal, Avon, Garnier, Vichy marketed their Fair and Lovely skin cream towards Indian and Pakistani women in the U.K. (and India) with the claim that making their skin whiter would make their job prospects that much better.
U.K. ad:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIUQ5hbRHXk&feature=player_embedded
And the Indian ad:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-9tcXpW1DE&feature=player_embedded
In my admittedly anecdotal experiences Eastern European concepts of beauty also celebrate the tall/thin/Eurocentric standards that Americans adopted.

There is no way in hell this advert was ever on UK tv :areyoucra

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIUQ5hbRHXk&feature=player_embedded

 

[Nepenthe]

There is no way in hell this advert was ever on UK tv :areyoucra

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIUQ5hbRHXk&feature=player_embedded

It wasn't. Both commercials were aired in India and pulled shortly thereafter. I edited my post as Storm was quoting it and I didn't edit the "U.K. ad" part. But my point still stands that Fair and Lovely is sold in the U.K. and America didn't invent the white/tall/thin template for beauty; these standards are common in Europe and the U.S. so the OP's "Why are American beauty standards so ridiculous? is ridiculous itself.

 

[monta]

It wasn't. Both commercials were aired in India and pulled shortly thereafter. I edited my post as Storm was quoting it and I didn't edit the "U.K. ad" part. But my point still stands that Fair and Lovely is sold in the U.K. and America didn't invent the white/tall/thin template for beauty; these standards are common in Europe and the U.S. so the OP's "Why are American beauty standards so ridiculous? is ridiculous itself.

Ok profound sozment.

My sisters friend puts milk powder on her child to try and make her skin whiter, she is ethiopian, the child also has eczema

IMO there are different paradigms of beauty in different cultures and there are people who will go to extremes to achieve them. It is not a new thing and no country is exempt from this behaviour, you only have to look at such practises as female genital mutilation, foot binding, neck rings and piercings,botox, hair dye, tanning, steroid abuse, plastic surgery and so on and so on.

Some things we are more used to than others.

 

[Nepenthe]

Ok profound sozment.

Don't apologize for my inability to make a coherent argument.

My sisters friend puts milk powder on her child to try and make her skin whiter, she is ethiopian, the child also has eczema

You've mentioned this before and it has always stuck with me. It's odd, sad and admittedly a bit funny in a "what the hell???" kind of way.

IMO there are different paradigms of beauty in different cultures and there are people who will go to extremes to achieve them. It is not a new thing and no country is exempt from this behaviour, you only have to look at such practises as female genital mutilation, foot binding, neck rings and piercings,botox, hair dye, tanning, steroid abuse, plastic surgery and so on and so on.

Some things we are more used to than others.

Definitely.
I have a friend who was born in Korea but was adopted when she was 8 months old and grew up here. But she's gone back to Korea several times and noticed how concepts of beauty are diverse, yet an emphasis on thinness and whiter skin is more prevalent than not. Skin whitening products are huge in Korea, and it may be the inevitable consequence of Western culture affecting others. But in Korea, per my friend's opinion anyway, it's more a consequence of Koreans trying to distance themselves from peasants. The farmers and laborers are tanner of course so skin whitening allows the illusion of leisure and wealth.
speedwhite

 

[whereismynotecard]

Some people are really skinny and they look like they never eat, and I wouldn't mind looking like that too. But I do enjoy a nice sammich now and then, so it's not going to happen for me. At least I have Baggins to keep me in check. If he thinks I'm eating too much, he steals half of my sammich so I won't get fat.

 

[Charity]

What irritates me is a lot of men act like their "all that" deciding what woman is worthy of their attention and advances......If they only took a good look in the mirror they would see they would be lucky to attract even a woman who has put the "ug" in ugly.......Men can be so shallow when it comes to what makes a woman beautiful.....what ever happened to enjoying a woman because she is intelligent, genuine, faithful, fun loving and sensuous..

 

[whereismynotecard]

But some people are so ugly that no matter how nice they are, they will make you vomit every time you look at them. I'm not going to lie... Appearance is a part of what I look for in a friend. If they are so ugly is disgusts me, I just cannot stand to be around them. Really ugly looking people, even if they are nice, are just too gross for me to stand, I mean, I'll be nice so I don't hurt their feelings, but I would never date a really ugly person. (I don't date anyone, but if I did, it wouldn't be someone whose face makes me vomit.) They don't have to be perfect of course... but there is a limit on how many flaws, and the severity of flaws I can put up with.

 

[MysticSang'ha]

Man, the media has us so convinced at how shallow men are. :help:

Time and time again, how a woman looks according to conventional beauty standards (which always change, btw) bears little to how attractive she seems to other people. If a man thinks I'm ugly because I don't have the perfect figure - I don't want to have anything to do with him ANYWAY. Thank goodness that's not the truth across the board for most hetero men I know......MOST most men I know.

The media needs something to market to the people and to "sell" an idea. The 36-24-36 size may captivate for a few minutes only because culturally we have been conditioned to notice such a shape as the "ideal." But in reality, what REALLY keeps the attention and ultimately are standards of beauty are:

Confidence

Humor

The art of conversation

Intelligence

........

A woman who seems approachable, playful, and unafraid to live in her own skin is by far considered much more attractive than the runway model look-a-like who is a boring and whiny dolt. :yes:

 

[MissAlice]

I don't have confidence nor humor so I'm way out of league...

 

[MysticSang'ha]

I don't have confidence nor humor so I'm way out of league...

My dear, remember that they are far easier to get than a shopping spree at the Fendi boutique and a botox injection. :hug:

Confidence comes from realizing that you're an A+ woman who deserves nothing less than the best.

Humor comes from laughing at your quirks and your mistakes.

Those are free. And they work.