What If We Admitted to Children That Sex Is Primarily About Pleasure?

[psychoslice]

You seem to think that I'm advocating parents sitting down with a 3 year old and saying "SEX IS FUN YOU SHOULD DO IT."

Please provide your statistics.

I don't buy into statistics, I have over many years observed the world, my sharing is experience, not stupid polls that never get it right.

 

[Drolefille]

I don't buy into statistics, I have over many years observed the world, my sharing is experience, not stupid polls that never get it right.

Statistics aren't all polls, they're things like pregnancy rates as measurable by births, doctors appointments and the like.

If you don't buy them why would you claim they're different in Australia. Or were you just making that up?

 

[psychoslice]

Statistics aren't all polls, they're things like pregnancy rates as measurable by births, doctors appointments and the like.

If you don't buy them why would you claim they're different in Australia. Or were you just making that up?

I was talking on your level, I don't buy them but you do, so if their different here than where you are, then you yourself need to take that into consideration, where as I don't give a dam.

 

[Madhuri]

Age appropriate is good.

What about mothers breast feeding their babies until they are as old as four years of age? An infant will loose their memory of Mom's nipples but a four year old will remember and always look for Mom's nipples. A child then associates the nipple with nourishment and would not hesitate to reach for the breast even after breastfeeding has stopped. I've seen young children reach in a strange woman's blouse to find the breast. A child's innocence is very fragile.

I don't think it's a big deal to breast feed up to 4 years, although really not necessary. I think mum stopped breast feeding me when I was 3 but I have a memory of when I was 4 and asking her for breast milk. I was very disappointed to learn that it was no longer possible.
I never tried getting milk from other ladies though. I only associated that with my mother. It's a very intimate act between mother and child. I don't think I would have felt comfortable being that close to another woman. But then I was always socially shy.

I agree with Drolefille. Kids do many inappropriate things and it's up to us to teach them what is socially acceptable or unacceptable.

 

[roger1440]

What If We Admitted to Children That Sex Is Primarily About Pleasure?

Well, what if we did? Where would be the harm?

If they already know what sex is they could pretty much figure out the rest on there own.

 

[Drolefille]

I was talking on your level, I don't buy them but you do, so if their different here than where you are, then you yourself need to take that into consideration, where as I don't give a dam.

So you made them up? You have no evidence they're different where you are. If you do, provide it.
If you don't care, then don't invent things.

I don't think it's a big deal to breast feed up to 4 years, although really not necessary. I think mum stopped breast feeding me when I was 3 but I have a memory of when I was 4 and asking her for breast milk. I was very disappointed to learn that it was no longer possible.
I never tried getting milk from other ladies though. I only associated that with my mother. It's a very intimate act between mother and child. I don't think I would have felt comfortable being that close to another woman. But then I was always socially shy.

I agree with Drolefille. Kids do many inappropriate things and it's up to us to teach them what is socially acceptable or unacceptable.

Exactly, kids also try to strip and run around naked and that's perfectly normal but socially inappropriate. We teach them to be dressed except in the bedroom or bathroom. Same with young kids who play with their genitals, you teach them it's for private time only, not the grocery store or in front of your aunt.

 

[psychoslice]

So you made them up? You have no evidence they're different where you are. If you do, provide it.
If you don't care, then don't invent things.


Exactly, kids also try to strip and run around naked and that's perfectly normal but socially inappropriate. We teach them to be dressed except in the bedroom or bathroom. Same with young kids who play with their genitals, you teach them it's for private time only, not the grocery store or in front of your aunt.

Your being silly, of course I am talking about teaching them the big thrill of orgasm, let them work it out for themselves, don't interfere in something so sacred to the individual.

 

[Drolefille]

Your being silly, of course I am talking about teaching them the big thrill of orgasm, let them work it out for themselves, don't interfere in something so sacred to the individual.

Where did you think that adults were going to teach children how to have an orgasm?

You're arguing something imaginary.


ETA: Also you're ignoring that you made up statistics to argue a point. You're being intellectually dishonest on top of arguing imaginary things.

 

[psychoslice]

er

Where did you think that adults were going to teach children how to have an orgasm?

You're arguing something imaginary.


ETA: Also you're ignoring that you made up statistics to argue a point. You're being intellectually dishonest on top of arguing imaginary things.

I didn't make up anything, your the great statistic queen, again let children work out things in life for themselves, stop interfering in their sexuality, at least until their old enough to ask questions.

You are just after a debate, you just want to play here with words to win a debate, that doesn't bother me, if that is what you need, there there you win, but winning a debate doesn't mean you are right.

 

[Drolefille]

er
I didn't make up anything, your the great statistic queen, again let children work out things in life for themselves, stop interfering in their sexuality, at least until their old enough to ask questions.

You are just after a debate, you just want to play here with words to win a debate, that doesn't both me, if that is what you need, there there you win, but winning a debate doesn't mean you are right.

You stated that the statistics were different in Australia, and then that you didn't care about statistics. Either you have evidence to back up your claim or you made it up to try to win a point.

Kids start asking questions about their sexuality at 3. I don't know what you think we're arguing here, you're apparently arguing that parents shouldn't tell their kids how to have orgasms. I'm saying that we should include "feeling good" into comprehensive sex education starting with teaching kids appropriate times/places to touch themselves as toddlers and appropriate body part names (proper names not slang) and then as they get older continuing to include accurate, positive information about sex and sexuality.

That's it. Not "here's how to have an orgasm" in kindergarten.

I'm not playing words I'm trying to have a discussion that includes information more than "this feels like the right answer to me."

 

[psychoslice]

You stated that the statistics were different in Australia, and then that you didn't care about statistics. Either you have evidence to back up your claim or you made it up to try to win a point.

Kids start asking questions about their sexuality at 3. I don't know what you think we're arguing here, you're apparently arguing that parents shouldn't tell their kids how to have orgasms. I'm saying that we should include "feeling good" into comprehensive sex education starting with teaching kids appropriate times/places to touch themselves as toddlers and appropriate body part names (proper names not slang) and then as they get older continuing to include accurate, positive information about sex and sexuality.

That's it. Not "here's how to have an orgasm" in kindergarten.

I'm not playing words I'm trying to have a discussion that includes information more than "this feels like the right answer to me."

You are becoming more tamer in your words as you go along, which I can agree with now, you realize that it would be wrong and stupid to tell a small child about orgasm and its feeling. You are making more sense now and I do agree with you, maybe not on everything, but its a start for you lol.

 

[Drolefille]

You are becoming more tamer in your words as you go along, which I can agree with now, you realize that it would be wrong and stupid to tell a small child about orgasm and its feeling. You are making more sense now and I do agree with you, maybe not on everything, but its a start for you lol.

No you made assumptions. And made up statistics. And like to ignore science. You tell a kid who plays with his genitals that "it feels good but it's for private time only". No one said "You teach toddlers how to have orgasms."

You assumed it. My words haven't changed, you stopped imagining things.

 

[psychoslice]

No you made assumptions. And made up statistics. And like to ignore science. You tell a kid who plays with his genitals that "it feels good but it's for private time only". No one said "You teach toddlers how to have orgasms."

You assumed it. My words haven't changed, you stopped imagining things.

And the same to you sister.

 

[Drolefille]

And the same to you sister.

Whatever chico. Just stop projecting your imagination onto me and making things up to win internet arguments.

 

[psychoslice]

Whatever chico. Just stop projecting your imagination onto me and making things up to win internet arguments.

Projecting, don't be silly, your the one with the wobble mind lol.

 

[Drolefille]

Projecting, don't be silly, your the one with the wobble mind lol.

Keep personal comments, however strange, out of it.
----
Anyway for people who are having the discussion, being honest with kids about pretty much everything is really the best policy - you maintain their trust in you and you make sure they have the information they need to face the world. Teenagers know that sex feels good, pretending it's only ever about love versus ideally being an expression of love, but that some people do it just for pleasure.... one's honest, one isn't.

 

[psychoslice]

WoW, now your making sense, good on you.

 

[Drolefille]

WoW, now your making sense, good on you.

You're the only one having the argument that you are imagining.

 

[psychoslice]

You're the only one having the argument that you are imagining.

Well, we are both imagining it really, like your there and I'm here, its really like a dream isn't it.

 

[Drolefille]

Some statistics

• Researchers studied the National Survey of Family Growth to determine the impact of sexuality education on youth sexual risk-taking for young people ages 15-19, and found that teens who received comprehensive sex education were 50 percent less likely to experience pregnancy than those who received abstinence-only education.6
• Advocates for Youth undertook exhaustive reviews of existing programs to compile a list of programs that have been proven effective by rigorous evaluation. Twenty-six effective programs were identified, twenty-three of which included comprehensive sex education as at least one component of the program. The other programs were early childhood interventions. Of the 23 effective, comprehensive sex education programs:
  • Fourteen programs demonstrated a statistically significant delay in the timing of first sex.
  • 13 programs showed statistically significant declines in teen pregnancy, HIV, or other STIs.
  • 14 programs helped sexually active youth to increase their use of condoms.
  • 9 programs demonstrated success at increasing use of contraception other than condoms.
  • 13 programs showed reductions in the number of sex partners and/or increased monogamy among program participants.
  • 10 programs helped sexually active youth to reduce the incidence of unprotected sex.5

Abstinence-Only Programs Are Inaccurate, Ineffective and May Even Cause Harm

• A congressionally mandated study of four popular abstinence-only programs by the Mathematica found that they were entirely ineffective. Students who participated in the programs were no more likely to abstain from sex than other students.8
• Evaluations of publicly funded abstinence-only programs in at least 13 states have shown no positive changes in sexual behaviors over time.9,10
• In December 2004, the U.S. House of Representative's Committee on Government Reform led by Rep. Henry A. Waxman released a report showing that 80 percent of the most popular federally funded abstinence-only education programs use curricula that distort information about the effectiveness of contraceptives, misrepresent the risks of abortion, blur religion and science, treat stereotypes about girls and boys as scientific fact, and contain basic scientific errors.11
• Among youth participating in “virginity pledge” programs, researchers found that among sexually experienced youth, 88 percent broke the pledge and had sex before marriage. Further, among all participants, once pledgers began to have sex, they had more partners in a shorter period of time and were less likely to use contraception or condoms than were their non-pledging peers.12,13
• No abstinence-only program has yet been proven through rigorous evaluation to help youth delay sex for a significant period of time, help youth decrease their number of sex partners, or reduce STI or pregnancy rates among teens.

Comprehensive Sex Education: Research and Results