Time is a condition.
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Unconditional Love
- Thread starter momen
- Start date
4 common forms of love: affection, friendship, romance, and unconditional.
That last one is a toughy. You wouldn't neccessarly give unconditional love
to you mail carrier but you probably should to your chidlren, perhaps your spouse.
If we were capable of unconditional love for a spouse the divorce rate woudln't be over 50%.
I would suggest unconditional love for a spouse is rare. What if one spouse beats the other spouse. To me that is a deal breaker. Still the abused spouse could continue loving the abusive spouse but would be much better getting away from the offender.
I have a daughter going thru heroin withdrawl right now.
She is 40, been a doper all her adult life. Lives in Philly Pa. where drugs are everywhere and she succumbed.
I had her living with me a year ago,was going to foot the bill for a 2 year med. degree in imaging. She never set foot on the campus only 5 miles from my home and I gave her a good car to drive. Ah, well, she blew that, stole money, stole my pain meds, had to hide them a my g-friends houses. Left me w/o pain meds & I suffered mightily for that. Still I love my daughter.
She lives 700 miles away but called me to tell me how sick she was.
I don't doubt that. I've seen that & it's ugly.
I'm not the least angry at her, disappointed, yes, angry no. She wants help to stay clean. I gave her advice to seek help from the N.A. 12 step group.
I'm not angry at the drug dealer. She did seek that person out and she stuck the needle in her arm. Now she is suffering. I told her I'd support her in a program of recovery, she has a 9 year old child and THAT is the real crime!!!!
That pisses me off but no use in giving hell to a person down & suffering,
Give all the love & support in the world.
People loved me out of a 5th a day hooch addiction. God bless those souls who drove me to meeting for recovery in vicsious snow storms, hellish t-storms, taking time to help someone they did not even know.
Might that be unconditional love?
In recovery groups we pray for help from a power greater than man. ( H.P.)
We hold hands, bums, doctors,lawyers, factory workers, prostitutes, ordinary family people. After meetings we give thanks for another day w/o addiction and hug one another goodbye. Why hugs.? Because we may not see that person alive again.
That's why.
I've buried two friends that died of alcohol abuse, one 40, one 52. The 52 year old made great bucks, new car every 2 years, lots of g-friends, drank himself to death on rubbing alcohol & after shave. I was on duty and found his body.
Not pretty. There but for Gods Grace go I.
People that suffer together are closer connected.
The genetic link for addiction runs hot in my family.
Once a drank 2 5ths of 105 vodka in a day. Could not get drunk. I quit.
Nest day went into d.t.s, was out in a nut ward where my b.a.c. tested .40 24hrs AFTER my last drink. At anything near .40 it's a coma, over .40 brings alcoholic shock & death. Go figure.
I'm guessing the love reserved for a still suffering addict is pretty close to unconditional. I've dropped what I was doing to rescue a guy that broke over who was in a bar miles away where 2 men held him at gun point for a bad drug debt.
Put my life at risk to save his. That's the way it works.
Your thoughts appreciated.
That last one is a toughy. You wouldn't neccessarly give unconditional love
to you mail carrier but you probably should to your chidlren, perhaps your spouse.
If we were capable of unconditional love for a spouse the divorce rate woudln't be over 50%.
I would suggest unconditional love for a spouse is rare. What if one spouse beats the other spouse. To me that is a deal breaker. Still the abused spouse could continue loving the abusive spouse but would be much better getting away from the offender.
I have a daughter going thru heroin withdrawl right now.
She is 40, been a doper all her adult life. Lives in Philly Pa. where drugs are everywhere and she succumbed.
I had her living with me a year ago,was going to foot the bill for a 2 year med. degree in imaging. She never set foot on the campus only 5 miles from my home and I gave her a good car to drive. Ah, well, she blew that, stole money, stole my pain meds, had to hide them a my g-friends houses. Left me w/o pain meds & I suffered mightily for that. Still I love my daughter.
She lives 700 miles away but called me to tell me how sick she was.
I don't doubt that. I've seen that & it's ugly.
I'm not the least angry at her, disappointed, yes, angry no. She wants help to stay clean. I gave her advice to seek help from the N.A. 12 step group.
I'm not angry at the drug dealer. She did seek that person out and she stuck the needle in her arm. Now she is suffering. I told her I'd support her in a program of recovery, she has a 9 year old child and THAT is the real crime!!!!
That pisses me off but no use in giving hell to a person down & suffering,
Give all the love & support in the world.
People loved me out of a 5th a day hooch addiction. God bless those souls who drove me to meeting for recovery in vicsious snow storms, hellish t-storms, taking time to help someone they did not even know.
Might that be unconditional love?
In recovery groups we pray for help from a power greater than man. ( H.P.)
We hold hands, bums, doctors,lawyers, factory workers, prostitutes, ordinary family people. After meetings we give thanks for another day w/o addiction and hug one another goodbye. Why hugs.? Because we may not see that person alive again.
That's why.
I've buried two friends that died of alcohol abuse, one 40, one 52. The 52 year old made great bucks, new car every 2 years, lots of g-friends, drank himself to death on rubbing alcohol & after shave. I was on duty and found his body.
Not pretty. There but for Gods Grace go I.
People that suffer together are closer connected.
The genetic link for addiction runs hot in my family.
Once a drank 2 5ths of 105 vodka in a day. Could not get drunk. I quit.
Nest day went into d.t.s, was out in a nut ward where my b.a.c. tested .40 24hrs AFTER my last drink. At anything near .40 it's a coma, over .40 brings alcoholic shock & death. Go figure.
I'm guessing the love reserved for a still suffering addict is pretty close to unconditional. I've dropped what I was doing to rescue a guy that broke over who was in a bar miles away where 2 men held him at gun point for a bad drug debt.
Put my life at risk to save his. That's the way it works.
Your thoughts appreciated.
Unconditional love is the 11th dimension, it is one of the first parts to heaven. Within it being a dimension we see it interwoven into all of life, such as many animals falling in love, etc.
I cannot subscribe to that notion as I don't believe man is intended to go to heaven but reside here on earth and make the earth the paradise God promised it could be under a theocratic government overseen by Jesus and those annointed that do go to heaven to help administer to the building of the paradise we want. No sickness, no wars, no death, no crime, no guns. ( that hurts as I have a real nice collection of Smith revolvers
) ( I love my Smiths) still I'd toss them into the stel furnace as guns make great tool steel. There would be a lot of good tools in God's New Earth.
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On the contrary, Good Sir, if we were capable of unconditional love for our spouses, the divorce rate would be nearly 100% for we would do what was best for them.
Meh, it's not a problem. I am a work in progress, and work I am surely doing
. Thank you though ^_^
mainliner
no one can de-borg my fact's ...NO-ONE!!
momen
مؤمن
How can a divorce be the result of unconditional love?
Monk Of Reason
༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ
Yes. Though it is not universally applicable.
An example can be love for children from parents.
I believe that unconditional love is possible, but I have yet to see it practiced. It's something to aspire to in order to love oneself and others unconditionally without fear or blame. The "conditional" nature of love is primarily an expression of rejection as a mechanism for social control; we can slowly unlearn these conditions, but it takes time. In giving them up we can become more free, but at the same time we have to chose between our illusion of humanity which is conditional, to our unconditional acceptance of humanity and the self.
Yes, if love means we want them to be free and happy.
mainliner
no one can de-borg my fact's ...NO-ONE!!
i hope your daughters ok
she needs to ignore all her friends and people she hangs around with to get " totally " of heroin in the long run , its impossible if she doesn't..... Unfortunately.
iv seen it TOO many times ....... Make sure she doesn't hang around with her old druggy mates
Unconditional love is overrated and many of those who profess it tend to be hypocritical in practice. It's a nice ideal perhaps, but even love can become authoritarian when we start commanding how people should love each other. In general, it's probably not good to be totally obsessed with the idea of love all the time.
Kuzcotopia
If you can read this, you are as lucky as I am.
Time is a condition.
I see time as a unit of measurement that help standardize movements of mass and energy. So unconditional love unbound by time is essentially unbound by the perception of the movements of mass and energy. So unconditional love is static. . . I'm guessing at 0 degrees Kelvin, or as close to that measurement of absolute zero as possible.
This.
But, it could also mean we need to have a firm definition of love. Love doesn't mean accepting bad behaviors in a relationship, for example. You can love someone and yet still break things off with him/her. I think people sometimes confuse unconditional love for tolerance of any and all behaviors, and that's not what it is.
Mycroft
Ministry of Serendipity
It starts when we're a baby. When we're very young, it seems as though the parent is spontaneously on hand to entertain, cuddle, clear up, and reassure and are almost always warm and cheerful.
But parents don't reveal how often they've bit their tongue, fought back the tears and been too tired to take off their clothes after a day of childcare. The relationship is almost entirely one-sided: the parent loves, but they don't expect the favour to be returned in any significant way. The parent doesn't get upset when the child doesn't notice their new hair cut, or asks carefully calibrated questions about how their meeting at work went, or suggest that they go upstairs to take a nap. Parent and child may both love, but each party is on a very different end of the axis.
This is why, as adults, when we say we want love, what we predominantly mean is that we want to be loved like we were once loved by a parent. We want to recreate in adulthood what it felt like to be administered to and indulged. In a secret part of our mind we picture someone who will understand our needs, bring us what we want, be immensely patient and sympathetic to us, and make it all better. This is, naturally, a disaster.
Marisa
Well-Known Member
Yes, it exists. My first experience with it was from my parents. I can't imagine having done anything to make them withhold their love from me. I did lots of things that disappointed them, but never that made them deny me their love. I feel the same way about my child. To me, unconditional is not the same as falling out of love with someone. I can imagine lots of scenarios under which I might fall out of love with my husband, but never my kid. That kid is golden, in my eyes.