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The Coffee House - the UU Fellowship Thread

BrandonE

King of Parentheses
The new folks are a mixture of people new to the area, some of whom were UUs already, and people who just heard about UU and decided to try it out. We run adds in the weekly "arts and entertainment" paper, spots on the NPR station on Friday afternoons, and a few other forms of advertising all of which draw in a small but steady stream of folks. We also have a well respected art school in town and several other small community colleges.

The classes are three two-hour sessions on a weeknight. The first covers the basics of what UU is (as some folks are still fuzzy on this when they come), a brief history of how UU came to be, and most of the rest of the time is spent in group interaction. Some icebreakers that are good at starting small discussions, personal introductions around the room asking what brought you to the church and what you hope to get out of the class, which usually sparks some side discussions, and a question and answer period. At the end of the first, there is a "homework" assignment asking everyone to review materials about UU in general and our church in particular and come back with 1) a question about UU or our church and 2) something that excited, moved, or interested them about their review. The second class is a brief meeting with the executive board so they can learn about the structure of our particular congregation followed by a review of the "homework" which usually leads to a great deal more discussion. The third class usually continues with the "homework" review if the class is more than about 6 people. We usually practice "elevator speeches" where the person has to explain to a stranger in a minute or so what their church is. And finally, we review what membership entails and signifies, invite any who wish to sign "intent to join" cards until the next Book Signing, and then solicit pledge cards from those who decide to join.

A very full, but very rewarding three session series.

This class in particular is full of folks that are energetic and engaged in the classes, so it's a real pleasure to participate by leading.
 

Green Gaia

Veteran Member
I am. :( How are you doing, Amy? We in DC are shaken by the proximity. Most of us know people who know people... I can only imagine that it's worse for you.

We were all very concerned about 2 of our kids who attend Tech, but found out late Tuesday that both are OK. The TJ District Meeting is next weekend at our church :faint: and from what I remember of the registrations, there is someone coming from the UU congregation Blacksburg. I hope it will be a time of healing for us all.


I have to say (and this is probably the only place I can say it on this forum without getting jumped on) that I've really been trying to think of and hold in my heart the shooter's family. What hell they must be going through. I know the families of those killed are going through hell as well, but there seems to be a lot of support and love being shown to them, as well there should be. Cho's family are victims as well and I hope that they will be able to grieve and heal and move on with their lives and not let him destory anyone else.
 

Green Gaia

Veteran Member
Please keep UUC in Blacksburg, VA in your thoughts and prayers.

uuworld.org : Shocked congregation grateful for help

Some spinnets:

“There’s probably not more than two degrees of separation between most of the people and the university,” said the Rev. Jeanne Pupke, minister of the First UU Church of Richmond, Va. The campus is also the frequent site of the Southeast UU Summer Institute, a regional gathering of hundreds of UUs, so the personal connections to the campus extend to several thousand Unitarian Universalists. Annette Marquis, the district executive for the Unitarian Universalist Association’s Thomas Jefferson District, also made her way there.
Word of the tragedy also resonated among thousands of UUs who have attended the annual Southeast UU Summer Institute. Since 1975 SUUSI has met frequently at Virginia Tech, making the campus familiar to many UUs. SUUSI attracts about a thousand people annually and is among the largest annual Unitarian Universalist gatherings.
And if other UUs want to help? “It’s just been wonderful to get emails of support,” said Marilyn. “We don’t really need material goods, but just hearing from the wider UU community helps so much. That’s what we need now.”

Many of us here in central VA know (or know of) Rev. Pupke and Annette Marquis. Just one more thing to show how close to home this was.
 

lilithu

The Devil's Advocate
I have to say (and this is probably the only place I can say it on this forum without getting jumped on) that I've really been trying to think of and hold in my heart the shooter's family. What hell they must be going through. I know the families of those killed are going through hell as well, but there seems to be a lot of support and love being shown to them, as well there should be. Cho's family are victims as well and I hope that they will be able to grieve and heal and move on with their lives and not let him destory anyone else.
Fully-veiled Muslimah voiced compassion for the shooter himself elsewhere. So far as I know, she was not jumped on.

I've been reading about Cho's family and it's difficult. They seem to not have strong ties with the Korean American community, which is unusual, and I doubt they have strong ties elsewhere. Yes, I really hope they find a source of comfort.

This is a great op-ed speaking about the tragedy from the Asian American perspective.
http://news.ncmonline.com/news/view_article.html?article_id=e3b9c4941f9d849f9358ddb3dbbbe5a3
(And this really is something that I would not post anywhere else on RF other than here.)

Here's something that made me break down in tears. People can sometimes be so cruel and yet people can also sometimes be so compassionate.

Virginia Tech pays respects to victims, and gunman
Sat Apr 21, 2007 5:01pm
By Andrea Hopkins

BLACKSBURG, Va., April 21 (Reuters) - Mourners gathered on Saturday for the funerals of many of the 32 victims killed at Virginia Tech as some students extended a note of forgiveness to the gunman responsible for the massacre.

A small tribute to Seung-Hui Cho, who shot his victims then himself on Monday, has been added to a growing memorial of stones in the center of the sprawling university in southwest Virginia where knots of weeping students continue to gather.

"I just wanted you to know that I am not mad at you. I don't hate you," read a note among flowers at a stone marker labeled for Cho. "I am so sorry that you could find no help or comfort."

The note, one of three expressing sorrow and sympathy for the gunman, a deeply disturbed English major, was signed: "With all my love, Laura." A purple candle burned and a small American flag stood in the ground nearby.
 

Green Gaia

Veteran Member
I have a little news to share with my fellow UUs.

1 - I've decided to resign as administrator of RF. Three years in one place is too long for me! lol. I just felt, and have been feeling for a while that it was time for me to move on and let others take over. But I will still be around and hope to be more active in the UU forum and reconnect with my faith and spirituality that I feel I've lost a little of from being so busy in my personal life lately.

2 - I don't know if any of you are in the Thomas Jefferson district, but the TJ annual meeting was held at my church last weekend. I met a lot of great people. Gini Courter was the keynote speaker, although I didn't get to hear her because it was my job to feed everyone over the entire event. :faint: I'm still recovering today, lol, but it was a great experience. It still amazes me that that many UUs fit into our little church! Everyone loved our grounds, as everyone always does. The walking trail was a favorite, I think.

3 - I'm all moved into my new house and am hosting my first party (a group from church) over this weekend. So, I better get off the computer and start cleaning....
 

lilithu

The Devil's Advocate
Hi Amy, :)
I've decided to resign as administrator of RF. Three years in one place is too long for me! lol. I just felt, and have been feeling for a while that it was time for me to move on and let others take over. But I will still be around and hope to be more active in the UU forum and reconnect with my faith and spirituality that I feel I've lost a little of from being so busy in my personal life lately.
Somehow I am not surprised by this. Well, I welcome the opportunity to see more of you in the UU forum. And thank you for all the work you've done to establish RF as the place that it is. :bow:

2 - I don't know if any of you are in the Thomas Jefferson district, but the TJ annual meeting was held at my church last weekend. I met a lot of great people. Gini Courter was the keynote speaker, although I didn't get to hear her because it was my job to feed everyone over the entire event. :faint: I'm still recovering today, lol, but it was a great experience. It still amazes me that that many UUs fit into our little church! Everyone loved our grounds, as everyone always does. The walking trail was a favorite, I think.
Congrats on hosting a successful district meeting! How many attendees did you get? I have yet to make it to a Joseph Priestly district meeting. :eek:
 

Green Gaia

Veteran Member
Congrats on hosting a successful district meeting! How many attendees did you get? I have yet to make it to a Joseph Priestly district meeting. :eek:

We had 124 pre-registered, and I don't know how many walk-ins and volunteers were there at any one time. It seemed like twice that many though, I guess with everyone wandering around it made it feel like more people than it was. So many people signed up for the workshop with Gini, and since it was a beautiful day, that it was held outside under the front awning. I hope someone got a picture of that. Almost looked like a tent revival!

Most of our congregation was involved in one way or another, either providing home hospitiality or helping me with food, or doing set-up. It was quite amazing.
 

jamaesi

To Save A Lamb
Congrats on the new house, Amy! I remember the pictures of the owls from your old home. Now every time I see an owl it makes me think of you. :)
 

jamaesi

To Save A Lamb
Here I am again to ramble...

A few days ago I was a victim of a hate crime. I just had gotten out of my 4:30-5:18 class on Wednesday... late afternoon, early evening. I was riding my scooter on High Street, our campus's east border. I had a cultural program for my housing program that night, a Bollywood movie and Paki/Indian food and then a little discussion about Desi culture. I was looking for a store that sold ice for the drinks. I was waiting to cross the street when a truckful of college age looking boys pulled up and screamed "TERRORIST! HEY TERRORIST!" They threw trash out the window at me before they drove off.

I'm just more... shocked than anything, you know? Nothing like this has happened since I moved here to Columbus for Uni. I've had the comments. "Oh, your English is very good!" (It's only my native language!) "Aren't you an exchange/foreign student?" (I wasn't aware that Pennsylvania was now actually a state of Pakistan!) "Do you have that cane because your husband beats you?" (He must have been beating me since I was in the womb, I was born like this...) I've attended anti-Islam/Muslim events and been treated respectfully. But nothing so random and so physical.

Back home, I come from a small town with even smaller minds... I sort of expected it. Hell, I've had people cross the street to spit in my face back home. It was just so out of the blue. When I got home I just sort of had a cry and my friends comforted me and I'm fine now. Just still... it makes me nervous. Even before this happened, if I go out alone at night I don't wear my hijab just because I am afraid of being hurt. This sort of... you know, really that fear a reality and it happened at around 5:30ish in the evening on a weekday.

It's so... troubling. :( I've felt relatively safe here up until now. I know I shouldn't let a few random jerks effect me like this, but what if I met up with those few jerks alone when there's less people about...? I wish I could have my service dog in the dorm with me, that's one of the main reasons I have one- so I can feel safe as a disabled woman without having to have someone else there to protect me.
 

lilithu

The Devil's Advocate
Here I am again to ramble...

A few days ago I was a victim of a hate crime. I just had gotten out of my 4:30-5:18 class on Wednesday... late afternoon, early evening. I was riding my scooter on High Street, our campus's east border. I had a cultural program for my housing program that night, a Bollywood movie and Paki/Indian food and then a little discussion about Desi culture. I was looking for a store that sold ice for the drinks. I was waiting to cross the street when a truckful of college age looking boys pulled up and screamed "TERRORIST! HEY TERRORIST!" They threw trash out the window at me before they drove off.

I'm just more... shocked than anything, you know? Nothing like this has happened since I moved here to Columbus for Uni. I've had the comments. "Oh, your English is very good!" (It's only my native language!) "Aren't you an exchange/foreign student?" (I wasn't aware that Pennsylvania was now actually a state of Pakistan!) "Do you have that cane because your husband beats you?" (He must have been beating me since I was in the womb, I was born like this...) I've attended anti-Islam/Muslim events and been treated respectfully. But nothing so random and so physical.

Back home, I come from a small town with even smaller minds... I sort of expected it. Hell, I've had people cross the street to spit in my face back home. It was just so out of the blue. When I got home I just sort of had a cry and my friends comforted me and I'm fine now. Just still... it makes me nervous. Even before this happened, if I go out alone at night I don't wear my hijab just because I am afraid of being hurt. This sort of... you know, really that fear a reality and it happened at around 5:30ish in the evening on a weekday.

It's so... troubling. :( I've felt relatively safe here up until now. I know I shouldn't let a few random jerks effect me like this, but what if I met up with those few jerks alone when there's less people about...? I wish I could have my service dog in the dorm with me, that's one of the main reasons I have one- so I can feel safe as a disabled woman without having to have someone else there to protect me.
...sigh... I don't know what to say except I'm sorry.... :hug:
 

des

Active Member
Oh gee, This is so sad. I feel so sorry!

BTW, re: the dog. If it is a service dog, the dorm should not be able to complain. The ADA and most groups protect your right to have a service dog. Or do you feel being in the dorm makes it difficult to keep a dog.

--des
Here I am again to ramble...

A few days ago I was a victim of a hate crime. I just had gotten out of my 4:30-5:18 class on Wednesday... late afternoon, early evening. I was riding my scooter on High Street, our campus's east border. I had a cultural program for my housing program that night, a Bollywood movie and Paki/Indian food and then a little discussion about Desi culture. I was looking for a store that sold ice for the drinks. I was waiting to cross the street when a truckful of college age looking boys pulled up and screamed "TERRORIST! HEY TERRORIST!" They threw trash out the window at me before they drove off.

I'm just more... shocked than anything, you know? Nothing like this has happened since I moved here to Columbus for Uni. I've had the comments. "Oh, your English is very good!" (It's only my native language!) "Aren't you an exchange/foreign student?" (I wasn't aware that Pennsylvania was now actually a state of Pakistan!) "Do you have that cane because your husband beats you?" (He must have been beating me since I was in the womb, I was born like this...) I've attended anti-Islam/Muslim events and been treated respectfully. But nothing so random and so physical.

Back home, I come from a small town with even smaller minds... I sort of expected it. Hell, I've had people cross the street to spit in my face back home. It was just so out of the blue. When I got home I just sort of had a cry and my friends comforted me and I'm fine now. Just still... it makes me nervous. Even before this happened, if I go out alone at night I don't wear my hijab just because I am afraid of being hurt. This sort of... you know, really that fear a reality and it happened at around 5:30ish in the evening on a weekday.

It's so... troubling. :( I've felt relatively safe here up until now. I know I shouldn't let a few random jerks effect me like this, but what if I met up with those few jerks alone when there's less people about...? I wish I could have my service dog in the dorm with me, that's one of the main reasons I have one- so I can feel safe as a disabled woman without having to have someone else there to protect me.
 

applewuud

Active Member
Jamaesi, I'm sorry this happened to you. If it's any comfort to you, things like this happen regardless of ethnicity. I was bicycling through a white neighborhood in Boston a while back, and a bunch of young men threw bottles at me with no provocation whatsoever...I'm white, nothing unusual except I wasn't from their neighborhood. Same thing has happened to me walking along a country road.

They are just random jerks, engaging in typical adolescent primate behavior, displaying aggression to anyone not in their immediate "tribe". The climate of fear and frustration that television pushes on people who don't have a life of their own yet makes them act out. You simply ran into some bad apples who had nothing better to do. I steer clear of groups of kids hanging out with no clear purpose, myself.

You are as safe now as you've always been. It sounds like you're taking reasonable precautions. It's a bummer, though, that you should have ever experienced this. I pray that someday we'll build a society where this kind of assault and disrespect never happens to anyone.
 

lilithu

The Devil's Advocate
Jamaesi, I'm sorry this happened to you. If it's any comfort to you, things like this happen regardless of ethnicity. I was bicycling through a white neighborhood in Boston a while back, and a bunch of young men threw bottles at me with no provocation whatsoever...I'm white, nothing unusual except I wasn't from their neighborhood. Same thing has happened to me walking along a country road.

They are just random jerks, engaging in typical adolescent primate behavior, displaying aggression to anyone not in their immediate "tribe". The climate of fear and frustration that television pushes on people who don't have a life of their own yet makes them act out. You simply ran into some bad apples who had nothing better to do. I steer clear of groups of kids hanging out with no clear purpose, myself.

You are as safe now as you've always been. It sounds like you're taking reasonable precautions. It's a bummer, though, that you should have ever experienced this. I pray that someday we'll build a society where this kind of assault and disrespect never happens to anyone.
applewuud, I recognize that you have the best of intentions and are just trying to comfort a fellow UU. But telling someone who has just been called a "TERRORIST!" and who doesn't feel safe walking around in her hijab that things like this happen "regardless of ethnicity" is not necessarily the most comforting thing she can hear.

I respectfully disagree that she is as safe as she's always been. I truly truly do not mean to diminish your own experience, but when you walked out of that neighborhood, you were "safe" and could thus put it behind you. For Muslims living in this country, or anyone who looks like them, there is no way to walk out of the "unsafe" neighborhood into a "safe" one.
 

applewuud

Active Member
Yes, I understand that hooligans are more likely to act out against those who they perceive as being different from them, and that Muslims are in a particularly difficult situation in our society. I didn't mean to discount that. :sorry1:
 

lilithu

The Devil's Advocate
Yes, I understand that hooligans are more likely to act out against those who they perceive as being different from them, and that Muslims are in a particularly difficult situation in our society. I didn't mean to discount that. :sorry1:
This is why I love UUs! :) We are not perfect. (If anyone is interest, I will relate the stoopid thing that I once said to my minister who is gay.) But we're almost always willing to listen to the perspectives of others.
 

uumckk16

Active Member
Here I am again to ramble...

A few days ago I was a victim of a hate crime. I just had gotten out of my 4:30-5:18 class on Wednesday... late afternoon, early evening. I was riding my scooter on High Street, our campus's east border. I had a cultural program for my housing program that night, a Bollywood movie and Paki/Indian food and then a little discussion about Desi culture. I was looking for a store that sold ice for the drinks. I was waiting to cross the street when a truckful of college age looking boys pulled up and screamed "TERRORIST! HEY TERRORIST!" They threw trash out the window at me before they drove off.

I'm just more... shocked than anything, you know? Nothing like this has happened since I moved here to Columbus for Uni. I've had the comments. "Oh, your English is very good!" (It's only my native language!) "Aren't you an exchange/foreign student?" (I wasn't aware that Pennsylvania was now actually a state of Pakistan!) "Do you have that cane because your husband beats you?" (He must have been beating me since I was in the womb, I was born like this...) I've attended anti-Islam/Muslim events and been treated respectfully. But nothing so random and so physical.

Back home, I come from a small town with even smaller minds... I sort of expected it. Hell, I've had people cross the street to spit in my face back home. It was just so out of the blue. When I got home I just sort of had a cry and my friends comforted me and I'm fine now. Just still... it makes me nervous. Even before this happened, if I go out alone at night I don't wear my hijab just because I am afraid of being hurt. This sort of... you know, really that fear a reality and it happened at around 5:30ish in the evening on a weekday.

It's so... troubling. :( I've felt relatively safe here up until now. I know I shouldn't let a few random jerks effect me like this, but what if I met up with those few jerks alone when there's less people about...? I wish I could have my service dog in the dorm with me, that's one of the main reasons I have one- so I can feel safe as a disabled woman without having to have someone else there to protect me.

I don't know what to say :( I'm so sorry :hug:

Some people are just so...ugh. I am so sorry that you have to deal with this sort of thing. It's so WRONG.

I'm sorry that I can't be more helpful... :hug:
 
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