Hello, I have some serious dilemmas regarding life.

[Priyadarshan]

Hello everyone. By birth, I'm a Hindu, a member of genZ as they'd say. By profession, I'm an environmentalist, though I wish to switch my career to administration, so I'm currently working to gain such an employment.
Not that long ago, like hardly until 2-3 weeks ago, I was deeply immersed in the materialistic illusions of this Earth, things like money, appearance, respect from everyone, sense of superiority, female attention, etc used to matter a lot to me. But with the gradual turn of time, I find myself completely detached from these things. I find thesebthings futile. Even the very definition of "LOVE", its meaning, its objectives, destiny, etc., everything has changed for me. Now, I find that God is the only love that exists, and the love for him is everything. God is the most beautiful being; the kindest, the strongest, the loveliest, the most compassionate and yet the most destructive.
My dilemma is that I know I have committed several sins in the past, and most of the people who have suffered because of my sins, don't talk to me and probably won't ever forgive me. I come from a conservative family. Moreover, I'm an extremely shy, introverted and closed person. So, I cannot even tell my family members about my sins, since I do not wish to disturb them or hurt them in any manner. Yet, the weight of all these sins stands too heavy on my soul and I don't even know what to do about it. I feel like I have wasted this wonderful opportunity provided to me in the form of life, caused pain and sufferings to others, lied, cheated, trashed myself, spoilt my body, stained my soul... Is there anyway I can get over it? Will God ever forgive me? Will those people ever understand my emotions, and will they ever forgive me? If I am able to bring lots of joy and happiness for my family someday, then I hope that I'll be able to tell them about my sins.. But will they forgive me either? I just feel like I have let God down. How to get over it?

 

[Brickjectivity]

Hello everyone.

Priyadarshan, let me be the first to welcome you to RF and to recommend that you repost this in either the Hindu Dir subset of the Dharmic religions Dir or in the Dharmic area. Dharmic Religions DIR

The reason I suggest it is that due to multiple religions on RF we have very strict rules about debate. Anyone who corrects another's point is automatically considered to be debating, and such posts may only take place in areas marked for debate. Additionally nobody is allowed to debate in the Introductions area, and I'm pretty sure that not all will agree about how to answer your question.

As for me: some gods will forgive you, and some will not. God (with the big G), to me, cannot be harmed and doesn't experience suffering. It is people who struggle to forgive and to understand. God is more like a big parking lot that doesn't get upset by car dings, but that is how I see it.

I think that to get over past sins you must build relationships with people that you have not hurt, because maybe they can overlook it. There are people who believe in forgiveness as a personal duty or quality, and they might be the most likely to help. Sometimes people can't forgive. Sometimes they can but the anger keeps returning to them, coloring their vision. It doesn't mean they hate you.

 

[Priyadarshan]

T

Priyadarshan, let me be the first to welcome you to RF and to recommend that you repost this in either the Hindu Dir subset of the Dharmic religions Dir or in the Dharmic area. Dharmic Religions DIR

The reason I suggest it is that due to multiple religions on RF we have very strict rules about debate. Anyone who corrects another's point is automatically considered to be debating, and such posts may only take place in areas marked for debate. Additionally nobody is allowed to debate in the Introductions area, and I'm pretty sure that not all will agree about how to answer your question.

As for me: some gods will forgive you, and some will not. God (with the big G), to me, cannot be harmed and doesn't experience suffering. It is people who struggle to forgive and to understand. God is more like a big parking lot that doesn't get upset by car dings, but that is how I see it.

I think that to get over past sins you must build relationships with people that you have not hurt, because maybe they can overlook it. There are people who believe in forgiveness as a personal duty or quality, and they might be the most likely to help. Sometimes people can't forgive. Sometimes they can but the anger keeps returning to them, coloring their vision. It doesn't mean they hate you.

Thank you for your wonderful reply, Brickjectivity. Earlier, I was not allowed to post in DIR, so I had to make my first post here. Later, I posted things in detail in the Dharmic DIR.
Another thing is that, our philosophy says that there is one God, and everything whether different deities, humans, animals, ghosts, mountains, rivers, etc are only its manifestations. And since the people who had to suffer because of me were not only Hindus, so different religious perspectives would only help. Not that I want to see it turn into a debate. I want to know things for myself.

 

[Brickjectivity]

Thank you for your wonderful reply, Brickjectivity. Earlier, I was not allowed to post in DIR, so I had to make my first post here. Later, I posted things in detail in the Dharmic DIR.
Another thing is that, our philosophy says that there is one God, and everything whether different deities, humans, animals, ghosts, mountains, rivers, etc are only its manifestations. And since the people who had to suffer because of me were not only Hindus, so different religious perspectives would only help. Not that I want to see it turn into a debate. I want to know things for myself.

That is very interesting, and I appreciate you sharing it. Despite being a moderator here I am not a great source of information about Christianity or religions in general though I have picked up a lot and am familiar with the protestant accepted Christian canon, which is frequently sold as a single book called the Bible. I think that the philosophy you mention about God and all else being manifestations is vaguely alluded to by some Christian authors, so there could be some common understanding although I think that modern protestants are a lot less philosophical and are more fundamentalist in character. A lot of times if you do not match a very specific belief about God then it is viewed as problematic, so it is not like you can be born into Christianity although technically most people are. For example we have creeds which people must recite, and these are like axioms and very often are the club card that is required to take communion (which is an essential rite for protestants). You must be willing to say "I believe this and that" and even jump through hoops to prove that you believe it, or you are just a visitor not a member. There is a lot of focus upon belief and often upon believing that proofs are why you believe. This is I think the friction that has created so many modern atheists in the USA: a focus upon proofs as the reason why one believes. It is not just "I believe" but "I believe because...of this miracle." The philosophy is dropped mostly. Protestantism is not philosophical in character, usually. I used to feel insulted when someone suggested that my religion contained philosophy, because to me philosophy was just a word. I have no idea how anyone is expected to prove invisible things or to say that they can be proven; yet this is what young men are expected to do. For that reason I am afraid you will encounter a lot of ex Christians on RF with a few still hanging in there. We have some very good and religious Christians, but not so many. Many have taken a look at the requirements for church attendance and have found themselves unwilling.

Here is the passage that reminds me of your comment in the NT part of the Bible which is the thinner section in the back of it comprising 27 letters and pamphlets bound together. These 27 are written in a variation of Greek no longer used called Koine, which are somewhat translated into English: [Act 17:28 KJV] 28 For in him we live, and move, and have our being; as certain also of your own poets have said, For we are also his offspring.

But I should say that this is just a breadcrumb, and there is no NT passage which specifically says what you have said about God. It would be very odd to hear a protestant say what you have said about God, but I mention it for the sake of building bridges. I'd say that there are infrequent commonalities between Dharmics and protestants.

Forgiveness is a quality which Christianity inherits from Judaism. Christians interpret this differently than Jews in many ways, but we are required to forgive other Christians and other people in general, even though emotionally its not always sustainable. I mean there is a sense that as a person improves he or she becomes better able to be forgiving, but at the same time the demand is to forgive as soon as possible or immediately. To fail to forgive is to reject the same forgiveness which has been extended to us which allows us to be members of the one church.

 

[SalixIncendium]

Namaste. Greetings and salutations.

Welcome to the community.

I saw your post in the DIR and will talk to you about your dilemma over there.

 

[PureX]

Hello everyone. By birth, I'm a Hindu, a member of genZ as they'd say. By profession, I'm an environmentalist, though I wish to switch my career to administration, so I'm currently working to gain such an employment.
Not that long ago, like hardly until 2-3 weeks ago, I was deeply immersed in the materialistic illusions of this Earth, things like money, appearance, respect from everyone, sense of superiority, female attention, etc used to matter a lot to me. But with the gradual turn of time, I find myself completely detached from these things. I find thesebthings futile. Even the very definition of "LOVE", its meaning, its objectives, destiny, etc., everything has changed for me. Now, I find that God is the only love that exists, and the love for him is everything. God is the most beautiful being; the kindest, the strongest, the loveliest, the most compassionate and yet the most destructive.
My dilemma is that I know I have committed several sins in the past, and most of the people who have suffered because of my sins, don't talk to me and probably won't ever forgive me. I come from a conservative family. Moreover, I'm an extremely shy, introverted and closed person. So, I cannot even tell my family members about my sins, since I do not wish to disturb them or hurt them in any manner. Yet, the weight of all these sins stands too heavy on my soul and I don't even know what to do about it. I feel like I have wasted this wonderful opportunity provided to me in the form of life, caused pain and sufferings to others, lied, cheated, trashed myself, spoilt my body, stained my soul... Is there anyway I can get over it? Will God ever forgive me? Will those people ever understand my emotions, and will they ever forgive me? If I am able to bring lots of joy and happiness for my family someday, then I hope that I'll be able to tell them about my sins.. But will they forgive me either? I just feel like I have let God down. How to get over it?

I would suggest learning how to find God in the world, and especially in the people of the world, and love God in that way. As opposed to some isolate ethereal ideal in your own mind.

As to the guilt of past transgressions, perhaps it's time to make some amends. But be very careful and considered about this, because it's easy to do even MORE harm by trying to amend the damage we've done just to assuage our own guilt. Sometimes the best amends is to simply never do these things again. To let our reformed behavior stand as our amends for our past behavior.

As to "God's forgiveness", it's automatic so long as you remain committed to doing better. That's my take on it, anyway.

 

[mangalavara]

Hello everyone.

Namaskāra, Priyadarshan.

By profession, I'm an environmentalist, though I wish to switch my career to administration, so I'm currently working to gain such an employment.

May your undertakings be successful and that you obtain all that you wish.

Not that long ago, like hardly until 2-3 weeks ago, I was deeply immersed in the materialistic illusions of this Earth, things like money, appearance, respect from everyone, sense of superiority, female attention, etc used to matter a lot to me. But with the gradual turn of time, I find myself completely detached from these things. I find thesebthings futile. Even the very definition of "LOVE", its meaning, its objectives, destiny, etc., everything has changed for me.

It is wise to be detached from such fleeting things. Not one of them will give you real fulfillment and everlasting joy. This is due to their impermanence.

Now, I find that God is the only love that exists, and the love for him is everything. God is the most beautiful being; the kindest, the strongest, the loveliest, the most compassionate and yet the most destructive.

I applaud you for understanding that. Through devotion to him, one can experience real fulfilment and happiness. This is because he is the permanent.

Is there anyway I can get over it? Will God ever forgive me? Will those people ever understand my emotions, and will they ever forgive me? If I am able to bring lots of joy and happiness for my family someday, then I hope that I'll be able to tell them about my sins.. But will they forgive me either? I just feel like I have let God down. How to get over it?

Your thoughts and feelings matter. I will reply to you about it in the DIR. I like what @PureX says in post #6, by the way, about guilt and reform.

 

[Revoltingest]

Greetings!
Don't dwell on forgiveness.
At any stage in life, one can begin anew living live as one is compelled.

Now, join us for a sophisticated discussion about your issues.

 

[Ebionite]

How to get over it?

Show mercy to those who have done you wrong.

 

[sun rise]

Welcome to RF.

What does your version of Hinduism say? From a bhakti perspective your answer might be different than from advaita.

 

[Priyadarshan]

Welcome to RF.

What does your version of Hinduism say? From a bhakti perspective your answer might be different than from advaita.

I would talk about my individual perspective here. I feel that karma is there and it has already been recorded, so there's no question that I'll face (or might already be facing) consequences. But while that is a broader picture for something unavoidable, I must overcome my personal hurdles like feelings of guilt, remorses, obsession, attachment, hatred, anger etc... Because these are the things that keep us from ever following the path that leads us to unify with the almighty. So, I must find ways or answers to overcome them.

 

[Priyadarshan]

Greetings!
Don't dwell on forgiveness.
At any stage in life, one can begin anew living live as one is compelled.

Now, join us for a sophisticated discussion about your issues.

That is very assuring. Thank you @Revoltingest .

Show mercy to those who have done you wrong.

Do you mean that by showing my compassion towards people who wrong me, can I overcome the guilt of doing wrong to others? That is very wise. I'll definitely try that. Thank you @Ebionite .

I would suggest learning how to find God in the world, and especially in the people of the world, and love God in that way. As opposed to some isolate ethereal ideal in your own mind.

As to the guilt of past transgressions, perhaps it's time to make some amends. But be very careful and considered about this, because it's easy to do even MORE harm by trying to amend the damage we've done just to assuage our own guilt. Sometimes the best amends is to simply never do these things again. To let our reformed behavior stand as our amends for our past behavior.

As to "God's forgiveness", it's automatic so long as you remain committed to doing better. That's my take on it, anyway.

Yes, not repeating such actions ever again is what I want to do. I just hope that I never ever get distracted again. I hope God will support me and show me the right way. Thank you so much, @PureX .

 

[F1fan]

Hello everyone. By birth, I'm a Hindu, a member of genZ as they'd say. By profession, I'm an environmentalist, though I wish to switch my career to administration, so I'm currently working to gain such an employment.
Not that long ago, like hardly until 2-3 weeks ago, I was deeply immersed in the materialistic illusions of this Earth, things like money, appearance, respect from everyone, sense of superiority, female attention, etc used to matter a lot to me. But with the gradual turn of time, I find myself completely detached from these things. I find thesebthings futile. Even the very definition of "LOVE", its meaning, its objectives, destiny, etc., everything has changed for me. Now, I find that God is the only love that exists, and the love for him is everything. God is the most beautiful being; the kindest, the strongest, the loveliest, the most compassionate and yet the most destructive.
My dilemma is that I know I have committed several sins in the past, and most of the people who have suffered because of my sins, don't talk to me and probably won't ever forgive me. I come from a conservative family. Moreover, I'm an extremely shy, introverted and closed person. So, I cannot even tell my family members about my sins, since I do not wish to disturb them or hurt them in any manner. Yet, the weight of all these sins stands too heavy on my soul and I don't even know what to do about it. I feel like I have wasted this wonderful opportunity provided to me in the form of life, caused pain and sufferings to others, lied, cheated, trashed myself, spoilt my body, stained my soul... Is there anyway I can get over it? Will God ever forgive me? Will those people ever understand my emotions, and will they ever forgive me? If I am able to bring lots of joy and happiness for my family someday, then I hope that I'll be able to tell them about my sins.. But will they forgive me either? I just feel like I have let God down. How to get over it?

You have too many rules that for some reason you think you are obligated to follow. Who told you all those rules are important and valid? Why do all those people get to decide how you have to live your life but your vote means noting?

I'm not sure hold old GenZ is, but I suggest you follow your own desires and needs as a free individual. You're shy and probably fearful, but facing your fears is the way to find who you are, and build c haracter. Experience life. Learn everything you are told is a prohibition. Give yourself permission to be free, and make your own decisions. From what you describe it won't be easy, but it is your life, and you get to risk for your own happiness.

 

[sun rise]

I would talk about my individual perspective here. I feel that karma is there and it has already been recorded, so there's no question that I'll face (or might already be facing) consequences. But while that is a broader picture for something unavoidable, I must overcome my personal hurdles like feelings of guilt, remorses, obsession, attachment, hatred, anger etc... Because these are the things that keep us from ever following the path that leads us to unify with the almighty. So, I must find ways or answers to overcome them.

Objectively how is what you feel guilty about worse than most other people? If it's just in the realm of feelings then maybe someone in the psychology area could be helpful.

 

[Eddi]

Will God ever forgive me?

If you have genuine regret for your sins and want to change your ways then I think he probably will, I don't believe that he's a tyrant

Welcome to the forums BTW

 

[Priyadarshan]

You have too many rules that for some reason you think you are obligated to follow. Who told you all those rules are important and valid? Why do all those people get to decide how you have to live your life but your vote means noting?

I'm not sure hold old GenZ is, but I suggest you follow your own desires and needs as a free individual. You're shy and probably fearful, but facing your fears is the way to find who you are, and build c haracter. Experience life. Learn everything you are told is a prohibition. Give yourself permission to be free, and make your own decisions. From what you describe it won't be easy, but it is your life, and you get to risk for your own happiness.

Thank you for your wonderful reply @F1fan , I understand what you're saying, and I am working on that. This is true that I am extremely shy and that is a major limitation in my character. But though I'm also fearful that my words and actions can hurt others, I feel it probably strengthens my character than the other way around. Did not Tathagata say the same words? Yes, the major flaw is that I had allowed myself to be too attached with some beings. But that does not mean that I have been a coward or weak in my character on most days. I have stood my ground against many whenever I'd feel what I am standing for, is righteous. There have been times when I would not give into the demands of time to become immoral, for my personal gains; and I had to lose many opportunities because of that as well. But there's no question that the sufferings that come from the realization of sins are far outweighing everything else for me, at the moment.
As for being free and making my own decisions, I have done that all my life to be honest. That is probably the reason why I feel I allowed myself to commit many mistakes, despite knowing that they were wrong. Actually until very recently, I was not religious at all. More or less, I considered myself agnostic or borderline atheist. It was just my constant search for mental peace, detachment and love that brought me close to become a believer.

 

[Priyadarshan]

Objectively how is what you feel guilty about worse than most other people? If it's just in the realm of feelings then maybe someone in the psychology area could be helpful.

I cannot answer that to be honest. I'm not that qualified to know the extent of feelings of others. I believe some would feel more than me, some would feel less than me, and some would not feel at all. But what I can tell you is that I'll try my best to overcome them anyway. And I believe that God is already helping.

If you have genuine regret for your sins and want to change your ways then I think he probably will, I don't believe that he's a tyrant

Welcome to the forums BTW

I hope so @Eddi . Thank you so much.

 

[InChrist]

Hello everyone. By birth, I'm a Hindu, a member of genZ as they'd say. By profession, I'm an environmentalist, though I wish to switch my career to administration, so I'm currently working to gain such an employment.
Not that long ago, like hardly until 2-3 weeks ago, I was deeply immersed in the materialistic illusions of this Earth, things like money, appearance, respect from everyone, sense of superiority, female attention, etc used to matter a lot to me. But with the gradual turn of time, I find myself completely detached from these things. I find thesebthings futile. Even the very definition of "LOVE", its meaning, its objectives, destiny, etc., everything has changed for me. Now, I find that God is the only love that exists, and the love for him is everything. God is the most beautiful being; the kindest, the strongest, the loveliest, the most compassionate and yet the most destructive.
My dilemma is that I know I have committed several sins in the past, and most of the people who have suffered because of my sins, don't talk to me and probably won't ever forgive me. I come from a conservative family. Moreover, I'm an extremely shy, introverted and closed person. So, I cannot even tell my family members about my sins, since I do not wish to disturb them or hurt them in any manner. Yet, the weight of all these sins stands too heavy on my soul and I don't even know what to do about it. I feel like I have wasted this wonderful opportunity provided to me in the form of life, caused pain and sufferings to others, lied, cheated, trashed myself, spoilt my body, stained my soul... Is there anyway I can get over it? Will God ever forgive me? Will those people ever understand my emotions, and will they ever forgive me? If I am able to bring lots of joy and happiness for my family someday, then I hope that I'll be able to tell them about my sins.. But will they forgive me either? I just feel like I have let God down. How to get over it?

Welcome.
I appreciate your thoughts and perspective.
I can and do fully understand and agree; God is love. Love so immense, so glorious it’s beyond words…as I think is the forgiveness of God. I can only speak from my own experience of wandering in sin and selfishness until I came to understand and receive complete compassion and forgiveness through the love of Jesus. It truly was a transformation from a life of sin into a new eternal life of love, hope, peace and joy. Once that happened, God led the way, past hurts were forgiven, broken relationships restored…
God bless you.

 

[Shaul]

Welcome to the forums Priyadarshan. If I may be so bold, I would suggest exploring doing Charity. Charity is a great healing source and is a major component of Hinduism.

 

[Ebionite]

Do you mean that by showing my compassion towards people who wrong me, can I overcome the guilt of doing wrong to others? That is very wise. I'll definitely try that. Thank you @Ebionite .

I don't know how it would affect your sense of guilt, but the idea comes from the Davidic covenant, where mercy is shown to those who show mercy. Your sense of guilt comes from judging yourself, so to be free of guilt ideally one would both be a just judge and repay the debt fairly.