Do you tell children that Santa is real?

[YmirGF]

I rather like the Santa Claus myth. I think it is a wonderful psychological setup especially when children discover that there is no such magic being. It becomes even more delicious later on in life when they become Santa themselves. It is a myth I heartily encourage.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

I think people need to lighten up and stop punishing their kids for their own issues. If you can't have a little magic and fun while you're a child, you're in a for a long life.

 

[sandandfoam]

I think people need to lighten up and stop punishing their kids for their own issues. If you can't have a little magic and fun while you're a child, you're in a for a long life.

I think you've nailed it.

 

[Troublemane]

...wait, he's not real???

 

[Don Penguinoini]

I think people need to lighten up and stop punishing their kids for their own issues. If you can't have a little magic and fun while you're a child, you're in a for a long life.

I agree.

It's Santa for Gods sake.

 

[Don Penguinoini]

I was very angry to wake one night to find my mother places presents under the tree.
I am still angry.
She says Well, it is what all kids have to believe, it is just a fun thing.
She is stupid, one of the worst things you can do is lie to a kid.
If I had kids I would tell them Santa is fake, Earth is Hell and nobody knows who god really is so look yourself.
Screw humanity.

You need to get a grip on life, then.

 

[MoonWater]

I think people need to lighten up and stop punishing their kids for their own issues. If you can't have a little magic and fun while you're a child, you're in a for a long life.

except you don't have to deliberately lie to your kids in order to give them that magic and fun. To imply that you do, in my mind, actually cheapens the idea of that childhood magic and fun. All you have to do to give your children that fun and magic is to encourage their own creativity and nourish their sense of discovery.

edit: and tell me how is "not lying to your kids" and "not trying to make them believe in something you know isn't real", how is that "Punishing kids for our own issues"?

edit: (just a note, I am not getting "worked up" here, I'm just genuinely curious)

 

[Kilgore Trout]

except you don't have to deliberately lie to your kids in order to give them that magic and fun. To imply that you do, in my mind, actually cheapens the idea of that childhood magic and fun. All you have to do to give your children that fun and magic is to encourage their own creativity and nourish their sense of discovery.

One deliberate lie is inconsequential compared to the countless unintentional lies most parents shower their kids with.

 

[MoonWater]

One deliberate lie is inconsequential compared to the countless unintentional lies most parents shower their kids with.

(I'd go into how unintentional lies, while still bad, aren't actually lies, but I'd rather not start a semantics game right now)

While I am curious about what unintentional lies you are talking about that still doesn't negate my point. It may be inconsequential in comparison, however we are not comparing them(or at least I'm not) and it is still a deliberate lie, which can still be damaging.

Now yes it's true that many children grow up believing in santa and then find out he's not and all that and are none the worse for it, hold no ill will towards their parents, perhaps even hold fond memories of the time they did believe. I am in fact one of those children(minus the last part as I don't really have any clear memories of the time). However there are also just as many children who are devastated when they find out and feel deeply hurt by their parents actions. And all that just for the sake of "a little magic" especially when it's not even necessary to do that to a child in order for them to have that magic just isn't worth it in my mind.

I mean how do you explain and justify lying about santa to a child?

 

[Shadow Wolf]

For me Christmas was a very magical time as a child, and Santa Claus was a part of it. I don't have any kids, but I plan on telling them about Santa while they are young. Partly so they can enjoy the magic of being a child, but also it will be hard to avoid when there friends are exposed to it, they will see him at the malls, and so on. As they get older and begin to question Santa's methods, I'm not going to push it.

Youth is a time for rational training and education, by which as adults, they then have a sound and meaningful basis to 'choose' a philosophy or Belief system that is most meaningful to Them (not You).

It is, but it also allows for a chance for the child to exercise critical thinking once they are old enough to do so, and with some aid from the parents in practicing critical thinking, most children should be able to figure it out before they are done with elementary school.

My kids thought there was absolutely nothing that was beyond Santa's ability to to, and if they wanted a particular toy, there was nothing to stop Santa from providing it. Explanations like, "There are only so many Battle Cats in the world, honey, and Santa doesn't have enough of them for every little boy in the world who wants one," didn't work with them.

Haha...my mom told me that the parents have to leave money out for Santa so he can buy the stuff to make more toys for next year. I don't remember how old I was when I had this super long wish list, but by the time I was in the third grade I had figured out that Santa isn't real. The teachers still mentioned him, either out of tradition or for the kids who hadn't figured it out yet I don't know, but at my school by the time of the fourth grade all the Santa stuff stopped.

 

[Kathryn]

Yeah, but then you said that you "messed with their heads" by making reindeer noises on the roof with a rake. That didn't make it sound like your kids were in on the joke.

It's not a joke if everyone's in on it.

I come from a long, proud line of practical jokers, and we teach this fine art to our kids early.

For instance, a couple of years ago, my oldest daughter was on her way with her kids to see us, and she came up with this fantastic story just out of thin air - she told her kids (ages 3,5, and 7 at the time) that I wasn't really a person - that I was a monkey who went home with my parents one day when they were newlyweds and visiting the New Orleans zoo. It was a big family secret - in fact, hardly anyone knew I was a monkey - not even my HUSBAND. She told them that I only take my MiMi suit off in the bathtub.

Then she called me and said, "You've got to run out and buy a gorilla suit and here's why!" So I did, of course. Every household needs a gorilla suit anyway, I figured.

Well, for two days we dropped monkey hints - saying things like, "Oh wow, that was so funny - it was as funny as a barrel of monkeys!" Or I'd tell the kids, "Stop all that monkeying around!" Or I'd say to my daughter, "Are you raising a family of monkeys or WHAT?"

The the coup de grace - that evening I went into the bathroom, and slipped into the gorilla suit, ran bathwater and then called out, "Hey, I forgot my shampoo!" Natalie told the five year old, "Here, take this to MiMi." Of course all their eyes got big as saucers. "Go on, take it to her," my daughter prodded. In she came, with her sisters (and dad with a video camera) right behind her. I had the shower curtain drawn. When she said, "MiMi, here's your shampoo," I stuck that GORILLA HAND out to get it.

IT WAS FREAKING HILARIOUS! All of them screamed and ran down the hall, as I followed in my gorilla suit. Pandemonium!!!

Then I took the gorilla head off (I could barely do it, I was laughing so hard!) and said, "Get back here, girls! I'm not a MONKEY!" I took the hands off as well, and back they came, in various states of laughter and shock.

Then we sat them down and told them, "See, this is what's called a PRACTICAL JOKE. It's not a lie - it's a joke - and there's a difference. There's a difference between fooling someone TEMPORARILY, fully intending to tell them the truth very soon - to be funny, not mean or sneaky - and telling a lie to hide something. Does that make sense? Lying is not good - but a joke is OK as long as you're not being mean, and as long as you tell the other person pretty fast."

They all giggled and chattered about it and then they wanted to put on the monkey hands and mask.

I think it was a good lesson to them - and it was truly hilarious as well!

Same goes for the rake on the roof and the milk and cookies. I always made it clear that Santa wasn't real. My kids never really believed in him - not one of them. But that didn't diminish the delicious excitement and curiosity they felt when they heard that noise on the roof.

They have all told me that those are some of their fondest memories of childhood.

 

[gnomon]

I was very angry to wake one night to find my mother places presents under the tree.
I am still angry.
She says Well, it is what all kids have to believe, it is just a fun thing.
She is stupid, one of the worst things you can do is lie to a kid.
If I had kids I would tell them Santa is fake, Earth is Hell and nobody knows who god really is so look yourself.
Screw humanity.

This post brings a certain warmth to my heart.

I think I'm going to cry.

 

[blackout]

I think people need to lighten up and stop punishing their kids for their own issues. If you can't have a little magic and fun while you're a child, you're in a for a long life.

There are SO many other ways to have magic and fun.
Santa's not some pinnacle of magic and fun.

(though he is an awful lot of fun to make fun of)

 

[Madhuri]

I don't really care if people do or do not tell their kids that santa is real. I personally would hate to tell my kids that he isn't real after making them believe in him. I would feel like a horrible liar and betrayer, just because they would be so disappointed.

I was never lead to believe in Santa and don't mind at all. Being a Hindu, there are enough cool things to believe in that really make Santa look quite dull

So I won't be telling my future kids that Santa exists, but it doesn't bother me that other adults choose to tell their kids this. I just can't relate to the whole lying factor. don't think I could do it.

 

[blackout]

I don't really care if people do or do not tell their kids that santa is real. I personally would hate to tell my kids that he isn't real after making them believe in him. I would feel like a horrible liar and betrayer, just because they would be so disappointed.

I was never lead to believe in Santa and don't mind at all. Being a Hindu, there are enough cool things to believe in that really make Santa look quite dull

So I won't be telling my future kids that Santa exists, but it doesn't bother me that other adults choose to tell their kids this. I just can't relate to the whole lying factor. don't think I could do it.

I don't care what other people tell their kids either.
I tell my own kids to just humor everyone,
children... adults....
because everyone has their own kind of fun,
every family has it's own traditions and ways,
and it's not our place to spoil it.
Even if we think it's dumb.

 

[blackout]

When pointedly asked by a classmate
if she believed in Santa,
my daughter (then 6) told me she said no.

In light of the question,
I felt that was a fair answer.

 

[9-10ths_Penguin]

One deliberate lie is inconsequential compared to the countless unintentional lies most parents shower their kids with.

Countless unintentional lies < Countless unintentional lies + 1 deliberate lie

 

[blackout]

Countless unintentional lies < Countless unintentional lies + 1 deliberate lie

Does every damned thread have to include math or science?!

 

[sandandfoam]

Countless unintentional lies < Countless unintentional lies + 1 deliberate lie

I tell my kids deliberate lies all the time.
If they fall I and get cut I tell them a kiss will make it better. I tell them if they work hard they can do anything they want.
I tell them that dead pets and relatives are in heaven and that good behaviour is rewarded.

Fact of the matter is that everyone lies all of the time. Lies are the glue that holds society together and the odds are massively, overwhelmingly against anyone who claims not to lie.

Puritans of the secular variety are as much fun as those of the religious variety.

 

[blackout]

I tell my kids deliberate lies all the time.
If they fall I and get cut I tell them a kiss will make it better. I tell them if they work hard they can do anything they want.
I tell them that dead pets and relatives are in heaven and that good behaviour is rewarded.

Fact of the matter is that everyone lies all of the time. Lies are the glue that holds society together and the odds are massively, overwhelmingly against anyone who claims not to lie.

Puritans of the secular variety are as much fun as those of the religious variety.

Funny, I don't tell my kids any of those things.

I put up a good deliberate fight against those odds.