standing_alone
Well-Known Member
Buttercup said:
:tsk: That's not very "Christian" behavior.
Even a heathen like me wouldn't do something as terrible as that!
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- Thread starter Buttons*
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:tsk: That's not very "Christian" behavior.
Even a heathen like me wouldn't do something as terrible as that!
YmirGF
Bodhisattva in Recovery
Buttercup said:Come visit me in Oregon and we'll go. Then afterwards we'll go egg cars!
We join Buttons and Buttercup in their ecstatic Choodianistic Egg Throwing Ritual.
Buttercup: "Target vehicle coming in sight, ma'am. Ready?"
Buttons: "Locked and loaded." *giggles*
Buttercup: "Fire!"
They both watch as the blessed egg becomes airborne and then plummets down onto the hood of an oncoming car.
Buttercup: "Perfect strike. That's 31 for me; 32 for you!" *giggles and opens another packet of freshly blessed eggs*
Buttons: "Did you see the look on the guys face. He was sorta cute."
Buttercup: "I'm married, delightful one. Hey look, he is turning around. Prepare another blessed egg."
Buttons: "Re-armed and ready. Waiting to acquire target."
Buttercup: "Target in range. FIRE!" *explodes in ecstatic laughter*
Just then the vehicle stops, the door opens, and a gorgeous State Police officer gets out... just as Buttons' blessed projectile hits him squarely on the chest.
Buttercup: "OMG... OMG..."
Buttons: "OMG... OMG.... (Whispers to Buttercup.) "Just act normal."
Buttercup looks at Buttons as if she has just sprouted antlers and kicks the last packet of eggs behind Buttons.
Officer: (Looking gorgeous, but rather angry.) "Ladies, can you tell me what..."
Buttons cuts him off, "Officer, I know why you have stopped and come to talk to us."
Just then a part of the egg plops audibly to the pavement. The officer is steamed.
Officer: "Ok, tell me. Why have I come to talk to you?"
Buttons: "Because you want to hear about the glories of Choodianism."
Buttercup: *Gasp.*
Officer: Choodi-whata-ism?
Buttercup croaks, "Choodianism, officer."
Buttons: "Yes, officer our great holy Master Choodle has brought you before us, so you can hear his glories..."
Officer: "Ladies. Turn around and put your hands behind your back. You have the right to an attourney..."
Buttons: "How dare you touch the flesh of Choodle's representative on Earth."
Officer: "Anything you say will be held against you..."
Buttercup: OMG ... OMG...
Buttons: "Unhand me. Release my hands now, mortal!"
Buttercup: "Just do what the officer tells you Buttons."
Officer: "and if you cannot affored a lawyer..."
Buttons: "Why are you perscuting me? My high priestess and I were doing our religious duty as prescribed by the Holy Choodle!"
Officer: "the court will appoint..."
Buttercup: "Just act normal Ash."
*Buttons smiles the sweetest smile she has ever smiled.*
Officer: "and... hmmm.... What was I saying?"
Buttercup: "You were rescuing us from our captors officer. Please release us."
Officer: "Right-o, now I remember. Odd feeling."
Buttons continues beaming her precious smile.
Buttercup: "Thank you officer. Isn't there something you have to do back at your office?"
Officer: "At my office? Ohhhh", as he is caught in Buttons' gaze, "Yes, yes, there is something I need to do." and walks back to his car shaking cobwebs out of his head.
Buttons: "Methinks a final blessed egg is in order."
Buttercup: "Ash, earth to Ash... Come in Ash."
Buttons: "I was just kidding, B-cup. But let this be a lesson to anyone who interrupts the time honoured tradition we treasure so much. Let no one trifle with the repersentative of Choodle!"
Buttercup: (Looking at her watch.) "Ok. If we hurry, we can still make it back to my temple in time to see the end of Survivor."
Buttons: "Good deal. I don't know about you, but all this excitement has left me famished. Do you have lots of cupcakes?"
Buttercup: "Verily. The cupcakes are fresh and life is good."
Buttons: "M'kay, deal." and runs off cackling.
Buttercup just groans, and starts walking in the RIGHT direction, back to her temple, then calls over her shoulder. "Last one to the temple is a rotten cupcake!"
Buttons looks around and realizes her error and groans, "It's tough being the High Priestess of Choodle. I don't get no respect from anyone." and goes scampering off after Buttons, giggling wildly.
... fade to black ...
NOT AN ADMIN NOTE: ReligiouForums.com does not condone the egging of Police vehicles, officers or heck, anything illegal at all. Good grief. In fact, we really don't know what to think of Choodianists or Choodianism, although we do respect their right to follow their time honored traditions in their persuit of happiness, and of course, their holy sacramental cupcakes.
YmirGF said:Thanks everyone, but the true credit belongs to Standing_Alone, Buttercup and Buttons. Without such rich material to draw on, my zany brain wouldn't know where to connect the dots. :hug:
What is amusing is that this was the second draft. I wrestled with version one for about an hour, hit Preview post and got a forum error.
You guessed it, when I clicked back... it wasn't there. I almost just gave up and went to bed as it was getting rather late. In that version Buttons and Buttercup met a Biker Momma in their jail cell.... who knows... if all three of them continue their endearing posts, I might find a way to continue this yet. Glad you enjoyed it half as much as I did writing it. Who knows what Standing_alone was up to while our heroines were paying religious oblations. :slap:
ROFL; as a Mod, I am not sure whether a)to 'caution you' for straying very much off topic,or b)To nominate you to the awards committeee for a humour award; I think Fruballs will suffice, as punishment for indulging in Choodianism (which seems to render any participants into a state of total lunacy.........but a delightful and harmless one)
Your writing is indeed great fun; Have you ever read anything by "Dornford Yeates"? - if you can get a book called "Berry and co" by that author, you, I am sure will love it.
So that shall be your punishment; to find a copy of the above and read it..........
Buttons*
Glass half Panda'd
Psh, you arent getting your humor award back Todd PMed me to say that your old humor award was now mine! Didn't you get that memo?ChrisP said:Sorry Ymir, Choodianism is dead. The Choodle abdicated and ran away with all those cupcakes you'd collected. But you can definitely have my humour award when Todd gives it back from the "confiscation drawer" he's put it in.
standing_alone
Well-Known Member
Buttercup said:
Being able to peel a banana does not make one a "good cook."
standing_alone
Well-Known Member
ChrisP said:No...
Serves you right, you RF exploiter!
sandy whitelinger
Veteran Member
Buttons* said:"What is yolking?
It sounds like scrambling your eggs.
