Recently, someone came up behind me and hugged and kissed(nonsexually) me. I stiffened up and gritted my teeth. Truth be told, unless you're in my immediate family, or we're in an exceptional circumstance(death, birth, major loss or gain), I don't want you touching me.
It caused some friction growing up... I wouldn't let my parents touch me, and I'd hide (or leave early without notice)so I could avoid the hugs. The thought gave me anxiety(though I am told my grandfather was an exception, I'd crawl right up in his lap and give him a hug, much to my parent's dismay).
My uncle used to bicker at me, and tell me my problems were I wasn't hugged enough by my parents(in which I'd stand up for them and say it wasn't their fault). But what really made him leave me alone about it was when I pointed out that people don't go around faulting my only male cousin for not being touchy feely, so why should I take so much abuse? Are all women supposed to be like that?
He took my point, and left me alone about it ever since, even once noting "Normally, I'd hug you, but I know you don't like that, so I won't." I thanked him. We both smiled.
How do you feel? Are you okay with (nonsexual) touch? In what circumstances? Which aren't okay?
How do you feel when someone recoils from being touched?
Do you think there's more pressure on women to show affection physically?
For those who don't enjoy touch, how do you cope when someone violates your space?
It caused some friction growing up... I wouldn't let my parents touch me, and I'd hide (or leave early without notice)so I could avoid the hugs. The thought gave me anxiety(though I am told my grandfather was an exception, I'd crawl right up in his lap and give him a hug, much to my parent's dismay).
My uncle used to bicker at me, and tell me my problems were I wasn't hugged enough by my parents(in which I'd stand up for them and say it wasn't their fault). But what really made him leave me alone about it was when I pointed out that people don't go around faulting my only male cousin for not being touchy feely, so why should I take so much abuse? Are all women supposed to be like that?
He took my point, and left me alone about it ever since, even once noting "Normally, I'd hug you, but I know you don't like that, so I won't." I thanked him. We both smiled.
How do you feel? Are you okay with (nonsexual) touch? In what circumstances? Which aren't okay?
How do you feel when someone recoils from being touched?
Do you think there's more pressure on women to show affection physically?
For those who don't enjoy touch, how do you cope when someone violates your space?