I would have agreed with the guy in David'ss post 3, to tell you honestly. Since heaven is supossed to be blissful and make you free of pain, discomfort, and so forth, the pain of knowing your child is in hell will, by god's stands, be gone. So basically, you wouldn't really care because you're with god.
I dont know if there is scripture about this. Say an mother and her adult child have been the best friends as well as parent to child all their lives. The adult child says no, I dont want to believe in god and he ends up in hell. Should there be any difference whent the mother goes to heaven and she knows her adult son is in hell?
Does she justify his being there based on his disbelief and age? Or should that even matter now that she is in heaven?
I dont like the whole thing; but, if I were a believer nad went off the technical definition of heaven, just by being there I'd feel no pain even if I knew my child was down there. Sad, but there it is.