Are there single fathers, who never married, with children in the West?

[savagewind]

First off, how does one need to write something like you did above that I highlighted? You don't know what constitutes abuse? And how in the world can you, with any degree conscience, say that abuse is the fault of the person who is being abused? That is what is meant by saying its not one sided? Or perhaps you think I deserved my nose being broken because his dinner was not what he liked? Or I folded the towels wrong. How can you explain this to the rest of us so it does not demean those of us who lived through it?

I think what he means is that anyone married to an abuser chose to be married to that person. Some people promise to love "in sickness and in health". Abuse is a sickness. What he doesn't know is that some people hide who they are. He is a sweetheart courting but after marriage he proves to be a snake.

Not many people choose to marry an abuser. They get tricked into the marriage. Therefore, I think God would call separation from such a person an annulment. You did not marry the man who would abuse you! So by God you may remarry.....but be more careful next time.

 

[Robert.Evans]

I keep seeing this note example. Okay, so, you wrote a note. No one is around to see you do it. Now presumably, you did something with it. Crumpled and threw away, burnt to ash, folded and put it in your pocket. This note you use for example leaves behind some kind of evidence that it at least existed, whether the writing on it remains or not. Someone could possibly find the evidence you have left behind. Could validate the existence. Your god has not the same evidence. Your god has stories written about it. Your god has people that say they "feel" the presence of, but your god has not left any conclusive evidence to substantiate its existence. Let alone any real message that could actually be verified.

You are desparate now I think.
God has left evidence everywhere; and it should certainly be sufficient for you if you take ashes as evidence of a word written on a note. That is ludicrous and would prove nothing in the way you want it proving.

I could say that George, the fairy that sits atop my computer monitor, said "it is best to eat chocolate ice cream on Thursdays for it will bring you luck when playing scratch lottery tickets", but unless I can prove George actually exists the words I attribute to him mean nothing.

I bet he does as well doesn't he

 

[Robert.Evans]

Because subjective experience is so often unreliable, it is a belief until verified. This is especially true for supernatural concepts like God.

You didn't answer the question: is it fact or fiction?

 

[Robert.Evans]

Yes. Personal, subjective experience has been shown many times to be unreliable, especially in this context. Facts must be verifiable by others, or else it could be an illusion.

You don't think an illusion could happen to many? Strange. Have you never heard of non-believers or read 2Thess2?

 

[Robert.Evans]

I get figures for the women, who never married, rearing children:

Mother
In the United States, 80.6% of single parents are mothers.[34][35]Among this percentage of single mothers: 45% of single mothers are currently divorced or separated, 1.7% are widowed, 34% of single mothers never have been married.[36][37]

The prevalence of single mothers as primary caregiver is a part of traditional parenting trends between mothers and fathers. Cultural definition of a mother's role contributes to the preference of mother as primary caregiver. In addition to their traditional protective and nurturing role, single mothers may have to play the role of family provider as well; since men are the bread winners of the traditional family, in the absence of the child support or social benefits the mother must fulfill this role whilst also providing adequate parentage. Because of this dual role, in the United States, 80% of single mothers are employed of which 50% are full-time workers and 30% are part-time.[37]Many employed single mothers rely on childcare facilities to care for their children while they are away at work. Linked to the rising prevalence of single parenting is the increasing quality of healthcare, and there have been findings of positive developmental effects with modern childcare. It's not uncommon that the mother will become actively involved with the childcare program as to compensate for leaving her children under the care of others.[1][38]Working single mothers may also rely on the help from fictive kin, who provide for the children while the mother is at her job.[2]

In the United States, 27% of single mothers live below the poverty line,[37]as they lack the financial resources to support their children when the birth father is unresponsive.Many seek assistance through living with another adult, perhaps a relative,fictive kin, or significant other, and divorced mothers who remarry have fewer financial struggles than unmarried single mothers, who cannot work for longer periods of time without shirking their child-caring responsibilities. Unmarried mothers are thus more likely to cohabit with another adult.[39]
Father[edit]
In the United States today, there are nearly 13.6 million single parents raising over 21 million children.[40] Single fathers are far less common than single mothers, constituting 16% of single-parent families.[41]
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Single_parent

I don't get the relative figures for single fathers who were never married, with children.

My point is in the name of equality men are exploiting women in the West, they leave children to be responsibility of the mothers, and the mothers have to become bread-earners as well as the child-carers.

Regards

That I'm afraid is feminism. Break up of the family. I don't recall men wanting the family to break up. This is the mess that comes after. There are always consequences. Anyway, I think most women will want to keep the children as they bond more with them. I don't think in the UK there are many fathers that do not help in some way, they have to.
I suppose some men will not bother, however, once they realise that women do not give two figs about them. Ahhh...... the modern world!

 

[leibowde84]

You didn't answer the question: is it fact or fiction?

Could be fact, could be fiction. Point is we don't "know" until verified, so until then, it is merely a belief.

 

[leibowde84]

You don't think an illusion could happen to many? Strange. Have you never heard of non-believers or read 2Thess2?

An illusion can certainly happen to many. Didn't you hear about the "UFO" this weekend, seen by many in California, that ended up just being US missile test?

 

[Robert.Evans]

First off, how does one need to write something like you did above that I highlighted? You don't know what constitutes abuse?

You have difficulty understanding because it is me? You have already decided who I am so now you can't discuss? what I was saying is that abuse can take different forms. okay?

And how in the world can you, with any degree conscience, say that abuse is the fault of the person who is being abused? That is what is meant by saying its not one sided?

Most times abuse is from two people, it starts with arguments that then become heated to the extreme. Verbal attacks are also abuse.

Or perhaps you think I deserved my nose being broken because his dinner was not what he liked? Or I folded the towels wrong. How can you explain this to the rest of us so it does not demean those of us who lived through it?

No one deserves their nose to be broken. Perhaps this is a subject that is too personal for you to discuss.

 

[Robert.Evans]

You said....

are you actually claiming now you didn't write that?

@Draka said
"Are you somehow saying I brought it upon myself?"

And I said no.
What is to misunderstand? But that does not mean that arguments and abuse are generally on both sides. There are exceptions however.

 

[leibowde84]

You have difficulty understanding because it is me? You have already decided who I am so now you can't discuss? what I was saying is that abuse can take different forms. okay?

Most times abuse is from two people, it starts with arguments that then become heated to the extreme. Verbal attacks are also abuse.

No one deserves their nose to be broken. Perhaps this is a subject that is too personal for you to discuss.

1. You said that "abuse is not often one sided". That is in no way saying "abuse can take many forms". It is saying, incorrectly I might add, that abuse in a relationship usually goes both ways. Nothing could be further from the truth. One side is most often passive and the other is aggressive, taking advantage of the situation.

2. You, seemingly, have absolutely no experience with being abused, so I'm not sure that you have the knowledge here to contribute to this conversation. So far, you have provided outlandish claims without supporting them. One major one being, that "abuse is most often not one-sided".

 

[Robert.Evans]

I think what he means is that anyone married to an abuser chose to be married to that person. Some people promise to love "in sickness and in health". Abuse is a sickness. What he doesn't know is that some people hide who they are. He is a sweetheart courting but after marriage he proves to be a snake.

Not many people choose to marry an abuser. They get tricked into the marriage. Therefore, I think God would call separation from such a person an annulment. You did not marry the man who would abuse you! So by God you may remarry.....but be more careful next time.

Of course it might be a man that might be abused, even violently, by a woman, his wife. But no doubt we won't bother about that scenario.

 

[leibowde84]

@Draka said
"Are you somehow saying I brought it upon myself?"

And I said no.
What is to misunderstand? But that does not mean that arguments and abuse are generally on both sides. There are exceptions however.

Arguments and abuse, in abusive relationships, usually come from one side. That is fact backed up by statistics, crime reports, and psychological evaluations. This information is readily available. The notion that women ask for it in any way is a myth.

 

[Robert.Evans]

Could be fact, could be fiction. Point is we don't "know" until verified, so until then, it is merely a belief.

Yes, sure, to YOU. But it can't be to me, now can it?

 

[Robert.Evans]

An illusion can certainly happen to many. Didn't you hear about the "UFO" this weekend, seen by many in California, that ended up just being US missile test?

That's not an illusion though is it. They saw it; and UFO means "unidentified" flying object, which could be anything, including a missile.

 

[leibowde84]

Of course it might be a man that might be abused, even violently, by a woman, his wife. But no doubt we won't bother about that scenario.

That's not true, as women get charged too. The point is, whether it is the man or the woman doing the abusing, the situation is most often one-sided.

 

[Robert.Evans]

1. You said that "abuse is not often one sided". That is in no way saying "abuse can take many forms". It is saying, incorrectly I might add, that abuse in a relationship usually goes both ways. Nothing could be further from the truth. One side is most often passive and the other is aggressive, taking advantage of the situation.

2. You, seemingly, have absolutely no experience with being abused, so I'm not sure that you have the knowledge here to contribute to this conversation. So far, you have provided outlandish claims without supporting them. One major one being, that "abuse is most often not one-sided".

Abuse can be verbal. Perhaps you are just thinking of a woman being assaulted by a man. It seems like it to me.

 

[leibowde84]

Yes, sure, to YOU. But it can't be to me, now can it?

By necessity, for you, it is a belief until verified. It is what the word "belief" means, as opposed to "fact".

 

[Robert.Evans]

That's not true, as women get charged too. The point is, whether it is the man or the woman doing the abusing, the situation is most often one-sided.

The point was that no one is considering the man being abused.

 

[leibowde84]

Abuse can be verbal. Perhaps you are just thinking of a woman being assaulted by a man. It seems like it to me.

Sure, abuse can be verbal. And, sure, the abusive one can easily be the man or the woman. No argument there. My point is that, in abusive relationships, it is most often one party doing the abuse. I have certainly been in an abusive relationship myself where my girlfriend was the aggressive one.

 

[leibowde84]

The point was that no one is considering the man being abused.

Where did you get that from? I never said that the woman couldn't be the abuser. That is nothing but a straw man. You said that it was most often not one-sided. I agree that men and women both have the capacity for abuse.