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fullyveiled muslimah said:I know this has turned into a 12 step thread, but I will make dua for you Mila. I have never smoked due to asthma, but I used to drink like a fish from 16-18 years old. Not a long time by any stretch but I drank everyday. I started with wine coolers and moved to whisky. I realized my tolerance level was high, so I started drinking heavy alcohol only. To this day i have never felt any signs of drunkeness. Leads me to believe I have never been drunk depsite relentlessly drinking Schnapps and 80% + proof alcohol. After never feeling drunk I thought perhaps God doesn't want me to drink, but it sure tasted good. I quit cold but I have cravings more often then I am willing to admit to. I have never given in to it, but I do look longingly at the alcohol aisle in the grocery store wishing that it didn't look so bad for a muslim lady to be racking up on bottles of drinks.
I can't rightfully call it an addiction due to my ease of leaving it, although I drank heavily everyday or other day. I was well on my way to alcoholism I think. Just hang in there though Mila and know that Allah is well pleased with the decision.
fullyveiled muslimah said:The thing I find most difficult to practice of deen is the way I communicate. You know I have to unlearn all the things I learned was a normal way to talk. Be mindful of the words I speak and to whom I speak them. No backbiting, exaggerating, and being mindful to fulfill the rights of all those around me. I don't know about other places but here it's just normal to talk about people. You see somebody on the street you crack a joke. Heard some juicy gossip? Spread it like the plague. Feeling crappy today? No probelm, just curse somebody out, or be horribly sarcastic. These are all nasty habits that are part of normal every communication between people, but on the day of judgment it won't be so light.
jacquie4000 said:Good Luck Mila you are a strong women I sense that about you so I have no doubt if you set you mind on truely doing something you will. I quit smoking myself just two weeks ago and find it a struggle but it gets better everyday. My son told me time after time mom I love you and I don't want to see you die. This finally struck home. I knew he was telling the truth of course but I did not want to think about it. So my mind is set.
Djamila said:Awww, Jacq. Best of luck quitting! Don't be afraid to share here also!
Well, I have some good news. I went out to a cafe with three friends last night and I still hadn't told them about this, I couldn't figure out a way to do it. Anyway, we went to our favorite waiter's section - it's a woman thing, I suppose - and I saw him walking to the bar (he has our drinks memorized) so I called and waved him over.
He looked confused (and adorable, God forgive me... hahaha... it keeps my husband on his best behavior) and I said I just wanted Cockta with a lime in it and he kind of smiled and asked why with his head sideways, like it was something naughty. I kind of swallowed my words for a few seconds, I didn't care about telling him but I didn't want my friends to laugh at me. Then I just said it - I don't think alcohol is appropriate for a Muslim woman.
And my friends were just... silent. Then Nadija let out a little of the laugh she was holding in, but it mostly just shock. Katija pretended she wasn't talking to me anymore and said to the others, "What did she just say?" - but the cute waiter came to my rescue! He put his hand on my shoulder and said he was very pleased, and then he held my hand as we do when we're greeting someone in the street and said, "A simple wedding band is a sign of a great marriage, your husband is a lucky man."
Then Nadija said she'd quit drinking if he'd mollest her too and then he left to get what we ordered and we just all laughed and cracked dirty jokes. lol
But I said no! I SAID NO, BABY! LOL AAAAHHHH!!!