Kungfuzed
Student Nurse
Does desiring nothing really lead to a better life? Is is even possible to not desire anything?
The only reason any of us exist is because of desire. If your parents never had the desire, you wouldn't exist.
Suppressing desires only makes them stronger. Desire can be masked and restrained, but not permanently obliterated. Desiring and not having leads to suffering. Over long term it can easily develop into bitterness and regret.
Having what we desire can make us happy and that happiness can outweigh the suffering of loosing it. For example, I have found great happiness in desiring my wife. Before I met her, you could say I was suffering, because I desired a wife and didn't have one. Now that I have her my love for her gives me a happiness I could not have had otherwise. I know it won't last forever. One of us is bound to die before the other. Do Buddhists believe it is better to have never loved at all than to have loved and lost? If she and I are happy together for a lifetime, will that not outweigh the suffering of loosing her at the end? If I suppressed my desire for her, and divorced her, wouldn't my feelings come back to haunt me later in life and make me regret?
Desiring the wrong things can make us suffer. If I cheated on my wife it would cause years of suffering on her part and mine. Gambling and drug addiction can lead to great unhappiness.
I think it is much better to desire realistically and wisely than to not desire anything at all. I think that the day I stop desiring is the day my life is over.
I say all this from a western point of view. Perhaps in other countries there is extreme poverty and discrimination among the classes and greater opportunity for suffering. It might be suffering to desire anything more than a handfull of rice. Perhaps in some circumstances it is best not to desire anything since you will never have anything anyway.
The only reason any of us exist is because of desire. If your parents never had the desire, you wouldn't exist.
Suppressing desires only makes them stronger. Desire can be masked and restrained, but not permanently obliterated. Desiring and not having leads to suffering. Over long term it can easily develop into bitterness and regret.
Having what we desire can make us happy and that happiness can outweigh the suffering of loosing it. For example, I have found great happiness in desiring my wife. Before I met her, you could say I was suffering, because I desired a wife and didn't have one. Now that I have her my love for her gives me a happiness I could not have had otherwise. I know it won't last forever. One of us is bound to die before the other. Do Buddhists believe it is better to have never loved at all than to have loved and lost? If she and I are happy together for a lifetime, will that not outweigh the suffering of loosing her at the end? If I suppressed my desire for her, and divorced her, wouldn't my feelings come back to haunt me later in life and make me regret?
Desiring the wrong things can make us suffer. If I cheated on my wife it would cause years of suffering on her part and mine. Gambling and drug addiction can lead to great unhappiness.
I think it is much better to desire realistically and wisely than to not desire anything at all. I think that the day I stop desiring is the day my life is over.
I say all this from a western point of view. Perhaps in other countries there is extreme poverty and discrimination among the classes and greater opportunity for suffering. It might be suffering to desire anything more than a handfull of rice. Perhaps in some circumstances it is best not to desire anything since you will never have anything anyway.