Someone to talk to about self-improvement for community and world improvement

[Jim]

I’m looking for someone to talk to about some things I’m trying to learn to do. It’s about continual conscious efforts to improve my personality, character and the way I live my life, in ways that might help improve the world for people around me, and for all people everywhere, online and offline, now and in the future. Someone to try to understand what I’m saying, and ask friendly questions about it.

I’ll describe some of it briefly. Two personality improvements that I’m focusing on now are humility and kindness. I’m also trying to learn to notice little things I can do for people around me, to brighten up their day, in everything I do, everywhere all the time. One thing I’m working on for behavior improvement is a list of ideas to practice in Internet discussions, to bring out the best possibilities in them.

I’m also trying to learn to be a better friend to more people, especially to family and friends, and to help with the growth and spread of healthier, happier and more loving communities, in neighborhoods and villages all around the world.

 

[BSM1]

Just try to be the person you would want to be friends with...

 

[Nakosis]

I’m looking for someone to talk to about some things I’m trying to learn to do. It’s about continual conscious efforts to improve my personality, character and the way I live my life, in ways that might help improve the world for people around me, and for all people everywhere, online and offline, now and in the future. Someone to try to understand what I’m saying, and ask friendly questions about it.

I’ll describe some of it briefly. Two personality improvements that I’m focusing on now are humility and kindness. I’m also trying to learn to notice little things I can do for people around me, to brighten up their day, in everything I do, everywhere all the time. One thing I’m working on for behavior improvement is a list of ideas to practice in Internet discussions, to bring out the best possibilities in them.

I’m also trying to learn to be a better friend to more people, especially to family and friends, and to help with the growth and spread of healthier, happier and more loving communities, in neighborhoods and villages all around the world.

I see self improvement as learning how to better deal with the world as it is. I don't expect everyone to like me or approve of my actions.

As far as my personality goes, I think it was more important to find out who I am and accept that. Sometimes there is a time for humility and sometimes there is a time for pride. I'm not the most friendly or helpful but I am usually friendly and helpful.

You want to change yourself to be what you think you should be according to some idea that you ought to be better than you are.

I suppose you have to assume there is something wrong with you first. Maybe there isn't. Maybe you as fine the way you are. Maybe It's only this idea that you should be something else that is the problem.

 

[Jim]

I'm thinking now of using this thread to talk about some of my online experiences. I have a list that I made years ago, of ideas that I want to practice and promote in Internet discussions, for them to be more fruitful and beneficial for all of us and for all people everywhere. The first two things on that list are to pray about what I want to say, and to search in my scriptures for ideas and inspiration, but I mostly forgot to do those until about a week ago in these forums. Now I've been practicing those two ideas intensely, stopping every few minutes to pray and to remember a verse in my scriptures. I think it's been the most wonderful time for me in all my 20 years in Internet discussions. A magical mystery tour, or like my house being picked up and carried to the land of Oz.

 

[Spirit of Light]

I'm thinking now of using this thread to talk about some of my online experiences. I have a list that I made years ago, of ideas that I want to practice and promote in Internet discussions, for them to be more fruitful and beneficial for all of us and for all people everywhere. The first two things on that list are to pray about what I want to say, and to search in my scriptures for ideas and inspiration, but I mostly forgot to do those until about a week ago in these forums. Now I've been practicing those two ideas intensely, stopping every few minutes to pray and to remember a verse in my scriptures. I think it's been the most wonderful time for me in all my 20 years in Internet discussions. A magical mystery tour, or like my house being picked up and carried to the land of Oz.

What kind of topics or question do you wish to discuss with others in the forum?

 

[Jim]

What kind of topics or question do you wish to discuss with others in the forum?

Go to my profile, click on the "Posting" tab, scroll down to the bottom, and click on "Find all threads by Jim."

 

[Spirit of Light]

Go to my profile, click on the "Posting" tab, scroll down to the bottom, and click on "Find all threads by Jim."

Look to me like a lot of your questions relate to how to make mankind better as a group,

 

[Jim]

Most recently, a person whose posts have always made me feel rejected and despised more than most or all others, said something that was like an oasis in the desert for me, and suddenly my heart was filled and overflowing with love and tenderness for them. It was such a wonderful healing experience that I lay on my bed for a while, sobbing and sobbing. Then I realized that what that person said was teased out of them by someone whose behavior I often disapprove of. Then I went from sobbing to laughing at the divine joke that I saw being played on me.

 

[Sirona]

What's the point of asking for feedback if you can't take the replies as long as it is not happy talk.

If one wants to make changes in a community one has to get involved in a community first. Speaking about big things like worldwide fellowship is great. Sorting out the details in a local group often is unspectacular, tedious and mostly unrewarded.

 

[Jim]

What's the point of asking for feedback if you can't take the replies as long as it is not happy talk.

If one wants to make changes in a community one has to get involved in a community first. Speaking about big things like worldwide fellowship is great. Sorting out the details in a local group often is unspectacular, tedious and mostly unrewarded.

I only just now saw that post, because it didn't come up in my notifications. The only reason I saw it was because I came to post in another thread in this "Family And Personal Living" forum.

 

[Jim]

@Sirona I don't remember anything that I might have said or done, to stir up all this hostility, but I do say unfair and unkind things sometimes, and maybe I did that to you. I can't honestly apologize without knowing what it was.

 

[Jim]

If one wants to make changes in a community one has to get involved in a community first.

I agree with that. Did you have some reason for thinking that I didn't know that?

 

[Sirona]

I agree with that. Did you have some reason for thinking that I didn't know that?

I just thought that declaring to strive for community and world improvement sounds great but hollow if it's just on the internet. Anyone can declare anything on the internet but for achieving most goals IRL one has to cooperate with others. In another thread, I suggested that it might be useful to make contact with a Bahai group in case you're a Bahai. You didn't seem too enthusiastic about that idea. You don't have to justify yourself, especially in the case that something possibly hurt you. But I think just declaring anything on the net is no big deal, unless one is in a situation when you can't do anything else, like for example when someone is housebound or bedridden.

 

[Jim]

I suggested that it might be useful to make contact with a Bahai group in case you're a Bahai. You didn't seem too enthusiastic about that idea.

I think it's a wonderful idea. I agree with that wholeheartedly. I'm just wondering what I've said that made you think I haven't done that.

 

[Jim]

@Sirona You might be thinking some things about me that aren't true.

 

[Sirona]

@Jim, only you can know yourself fully. I can only judge from the bits and pieces I see in your posts. So the picture might be incomplete.

I started communicating with you because in a thread you had complained that you felt unhappy or lonely. You said that you wanted heart-to-heart friendships. The one to totally understand you is probably only God, but I thought I could give it a try. I have to battle some kind of isolation that comes along with a handicap. The most useful step to socialize is to meet with people who share your interests, religious or other. It did prove itself helpful to me.

 

[Jim]

@JimI started communicating with you because in a thread you had complained that you felt unhappy or lonely. You said that you wanted heart-to-heart friendships.

I understood that you sincerely wanted to help me, and I see a lot of generosity in what you've been doing. Really, a lot. Generosity, patience and perseverance. There seems to be some kind of communication gap between us, and I don't know what to do about it. I'm fine. I'm not unhappy at all. I've had a few moments of feeling all alone in these forums, but only a few times, and only for a few minutes at a time. I have some wonderful heart-to-heart friendships, offline, and possibly some budding friendships here, better than I would have thought possible in an Internet forum in such a short time. That doesn't take away at all from the generosity, thoughtfulness and patience that I see now, in your posts to me, and I'm sorry for my impatience with you.