should i be worried....?

[ChristineES]

I remember when I was younger, they had commercials for The Peace Corps- "The toughest job you'll ever love". I think that statement is even more suggestive of parenthood! It's a tough job, but we wouldn't change it for anything.

 

[Sleeppy]

Thanks. There also seems to be a divide in reactions to if I say to do something and when my hubby says to do something. Evenings in our home usually sound something like this:

me:Ok kids, time to pick up your room. Pick up those toys.
*some minutes later*
me: you haven't picked anything up, start by picking up your blocks, now or you will face the wall
*totally ignored*
me:Wall now!
*after a couple minutes of whining in time out*
me: ok, now are you ready to pick up now?
*daughter tentatively starts picking up without saying anything*
son: I don't wanna!
(if my husband is home from work that night)
*hubby comes stomping through house and up to kids' bedroom door*
hubby: your mother told you to do something now do it!
son: ok!
*back and forth slacking off and daddy's booming voice until room is picked up*

Of course when he's at work the night takes a different turn where I end up having to pick up their room with my daughter while my son throws a fit in time out. :areyoucra

Take the lesson from your husband. I bet he wouldn't be the one picking the toys up.

Why not take the toys altogether, if he doesn't pick them up?

 

[waitasec]

I remember when I was younger, they had commercials for The Peace Corps- "The toughest job you'll ever love". I think that statement is even more suggestive of parenthood! It's a tough job, but we wouldn't change it for anything.

do we agree?

 

[waitasec]

Exactly! I think the same thing "why am I picking this up?" and even ask the kids that too. Did I play with all these toys? Did I pitch blocks behind the bed? Did I stick play kitchen utensils in the heating vent? NO. So why should mommy have to pick all this up??? On the nights I just do NOT want to deal with it and they are taking too long I have been known to shove it all to the side and tell them to deal with it the next day. Of course the next day they are complaining because they can't find this or that. I tell them if they picked up their room they'd know where everything is.

consistency...
do that enough times and hopefully that problem is solved

 

[sunshineydays]

you don't think my threat of throwing him in the fireplace for second guessing me has anything to do with it? :sarcastic

but i know there will be a down side to this...
right now he's little and easy to manipulate...but there will come a day when he won't be...

should i be worried?[/quote]

Worry has, never been good to the one worrying, nor the ones worried about.
But I would talk to the child to find out the paradigm of his behavior.
Is it out of fear from your threat, or is out of understanding why he should do as you say. Sit down and listen to his reasons for this, and then listen to yuor own heart and show understanding. Develop the relationship
Ex: if he were to come in excited over a good report card and walked over the floor that you just waxed, and you got mad at him, when he was just so excited about the good grades, that as soon as you got mad his excitment was destroyed.

Look you can always rewax the floor. But you can not always rebuild the relationship.
Sunshineydays

 

[waitasec]

Worry has, never been good to the one worrying, nor the ones worried about.
But I would talk to the child to find out the paradigm of his behavior.
Is it out of fear from your threat, or is out of understanding why he should do as you say. Sit down and listen to his reasons for this, and then listen to yuor own heart and show understanding. Develop the relationship
Ex: if he were to come in excited over a good report card and walked over the floor that you just waxed, and you got mad at him, when he was just so excited about the good grades, that as soon as you got mad his excitment was destroyed.

Look you can always rewax the floor. But you can not always rebuild the relationship.
Sunshineydays

hi sunshine...

i guess my sarcastic smilie didn't explain the sarcasm in that line...
if you read through the thread, my son is not that way... my point was, if we did everything god asks us to do, with out question...why then wouldn't he sit down and listen to our reasons...fear being one...fear of being thrown into the eternal fireplace...

 

[cablescavenger]

i don't know,
my son does everything i ask him to.

when i tell him to clean his room, he stops in his tracks and cleans his room without a peep.
when i ask him to do his homework, same thing...when i ask him to take an interest in playing the accordion, he's interested.
it feels as though my will became his.


you don't think my threat of throwing him in the fireplace for second guessing me has anything to do with it? :sarcastic

but i know there will be a down side to this...
right now he's little and easy to manipulate...but there will come a day when he won't be...

should i be worried?

I had two children, but lost one.
He was a bit of a tearway, never did as he was told, always argued with us, never tidied up, beat up other kids in the street.
We had a hard time controlling him, so we had to kill him.

Our other child. Good as gold, doesn't answer back or anything!

You never can tell with kids.

 

[waitasec]

I had two children, but lost one.
He was a bit of a tearway, never did as he was told, always argued with us, never tidied up, beat up other kids in the street.
We had a hard time controlling him, so we had to kill him.

Our other child. Good as gold, doesn't answer back or anything!

You never can tell with kids.

frubals....

 

[9Westy9]

i don't know,
my son does everything i ask him to.

when i tell him to clean his room, he stops in his tracks and cleans his room without a peep.
when i ask him to do his homework, same thing...when i ask him to take an interest in playing the accordion, he's interested.
it feels as though my will became his.


you don't think my threat of throwing him in the fireplace for second guessing me has anything to do with it? :sarcastic

but i know there will be a down side to this...
right now he's little and easy to manipulate...but there will come a day when he won't be...

should i be worried?

I see what you did there

 

[waitasec]

I see what you did there

frubals....

 

[sunshineydays]

hi sunshine...

i guess my sarcastic smilie didn't explain the sarcasm in that line...
if you read through the thread, my son is not that way... my point was, if we did everything god asks us to do, with out question...why then wouldn't he sit down and listen to our reasons...fear being one...fear of being thrown into the eternal fireplace...

Sorry I misread that one thanks for letting me know.
I think he already did that through the death, burial, ressurection, and ascenscion.
He did this/ we did not, I think to show how much he loves us. I think it is in discovering this, that one escapes all fear, and punishment, it is perfect love.
Understanding this can be difficult at times especially in ones time of adversity.
sunshineydays

 

[waitasec]

Sorry I misread that one thanks for letting me know.
I think he already did that through the death, burial, ressurection, and ascenscion.
He did this/ we did not, I think to show how much he loves us. I think it is in discovering this, that one escapes all fear, and punishment, it is perfect love.
Understanding this can be difficult at times especially in ones time of adversity.
sunshineydays

thank you for your input.

then why would it be strange if my fictional son behaved that way and not a strange behavior in real life?
'do what you're told with out question'

 

[beenie]

This thread is exactly why I struggle with the "eternal damnation" that we're so often threatened with. If God is supposed to be more merciful than any human could ever by, then why would he throw any normal person into the hellfire. I do believe there is a special place in hell for child molesters, rapists, mass murderers, etc. but for the sake of argument, I have a tough time with hell in general.

 

[waitasec]

This thread is exactly why I struggle with the "eternal damnation" that we're so often threatened with. If God is supposed to be more merciful than any human could ever by, then why would he throw any normal person into the hellfire. I do believe there is a special place in hell for child molesters, rapists, mass murderers, etc. but for the sake of argument, I have a tough time with hell in general.

i must say, you are one of the exceptional theists on this forum ssainhu

i respond to honesty in a very positive way.

 

[ChristineES]

hi sunshine...

i guess my sarcastic smilie didn't explain the sarcasm in that line...
if you read through the thread, my son is not that way... my point was, if we did everything god asks us to do, with out question...why then wouldn't he sit down and listen to our reasons...fear being one...fear of being thrown into the eternal fireplace...

I ignored your sarcasm about the fireplace mostly because I don't believe in any "eternal fireplace". I decided to say something now, though. I am in a different mood.

 

[dawny0826]

i don't know,
my son does everything i ask him to.

when i tell him to clean his room, he stops in his tracks and cleans his room without a peep.
when i ask him to do his homework, same thing...when i ask him to take an interest in playing the accordion, he's interested.
it feels as though my will became his.


you don't think my threat of throwing him in the fireplace for second guessing me has anything to do with it? :sarcastic

but i know there will be a down side to this...
right now he's little and easy to manipulate...but there will come a day when he won't be...

should i be worried?

We asked my seven year old, Ruthie last night, if she was Smurf, what would her Smurf name be, and her answer was..."Lazy Smurf". LOL! She owned up to her sloth like behavior when it comes ot not wanting to clean up after herself and her lack of wanting to much of anything unless big sister does it first or Mommy near prying her off the couch and "forcing" her to take action.

I wouldn't worry. He could change so much in the next month...

 

[waitasec]

I ignored your sarcasm about the fireplace mostly because I don't believe in any "eternal fireplace". I decided to say something now, though. I am in a different mood.

i figured as much....
and of course you are free to say what you wish...when you wish.
you see i know there are christians out there that don't believe in the eternal fireplace, this thread wasn't really for them, you being one.
but that's not to say i don't enjoy sharing stories about our kids

 

[waitasec]

We asked my seven year old, Ruthie last night, if she was Smurf, what would her Smurf name be, and her answer was..."Lazy Smurf". LOL! She owned up to her sloth like behavior when it comes ot not wanting to clean up after herself and her lack of wanting to much of anything unless big sister does it first or Mommy near prying her off the couch and "forcing" her to take action.

I wouldn't worry. He could change so much in the next month...

cute...you're sweet.
i hope you realize i was kidding about him being obedient...

i got to tell you though, my son's teacher told me that he's one of the most honest kids in the class...
"i'll give him that", she says...he's an honest strong willed kid, and as much as i wish he'd obey more, i wouldn't change that about him for one second even if i could...

 

[idav]

i don't know,
my son does everything i ask him to.

when i tell him to clean his room, he stops in his tracks and cleans his room without a peep.
when i ask him to do his homework, same thing...when i ask him to take an interest in playing the accordion, he's interested.
it feels as though my will became his.


you don't think my threat of throwing him in the fireplace for second guessing me has anything to do with it? :sarcastic

but i know there will be a down side to this...
right now he's little and easy to manipulate...but there will come a day when he won't be...

should i be worried?

The biggest trouble is teaching them how to tell someone is a good role model. As long as your a decent role model they will be fine. I don't think there is a sure fire way of knowing who to trust but I'm of the mind that actions speak louder than words.

 

[sunshineydays]

thank you for your input.

then why would it be strange if my fictional son behaved that way and not a strange behavior in real life?
'do what you're told with out question'

I am not sure what you mean here, but I will take a stab at it
Jesus did what he was told by his Father, and w/o ?
No one except a fictional son could behave perfectly. I could want to say if I were the fictional Son, I would want to be perfect yet I could not be perfect on my own.
So the only way I see is a pefect Son had to be born here to earth to accomplish the task of perfection, yet in this this Son coming to earth had to come in the flesh, yet it could not be after the simultude of Adam.
Hopefully I answered what you are asking, Thanks
sunshineydays