1. Welcome to Religious Forums, a friendly forum to discuss all religions in a friendly surrounding.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:
    • Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
    • Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
    • Access to private conversations with other members.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon!

Sexism Against Men

Discussion in 'Men's Issues' started by Debater Slayer, Jul 22, 2021 at 9:40 AM.

  1. Orbit

    Orbit I'm a planet

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2014
    Messages:
    1,882
    Ratings:
    +1,991
    Religion:
    Dinner
    The entire cultural set of expectations that feminists call "toxic masculinity" are harmful to men. The socialization (upbringing) to not show emotion, to not cry, to be "tough" no matter what, to be aggressive, to lack empathy, they are all ways that our culture abuses men,
     
    • Like Like x 4
  2. Kooky

    Kooky Freedom from Sanity

    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2020
    Messages:
    2,300
    Ratings:
    +1,171
    Of course, a large number of these harmful sexist stereotypes are being perpetuated by men as well as women.
     
  3. Debater Slayer

    Debater Slayer Veteran Member
    Staff Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    May 8, 2011
    Messages:
    20,311
    Ratings:
    +14,281
    Definitely. I view many of them as a result of patriarchy, which goes to show that it can and does harm men too.
     
    • Winner Winner x 1
  4. Kooky

    Kooky Freedom from Sanity

    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2020
    Messages:
    2,300
    Ratings:
    +1,171
    They receive even greater mockery from their fellow men and public institutions. A female rape victim has a small chance of the (male dominated) police treating her report seriously, a male rape victim has almost none.

    As @Debater Slayer put so well, the patriarchy harms men as well as women.
     
  5. ADigitalArtist

    ADigitalArtist Well-Known Member
    Staff Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Feb 1, 2015
    Messages:
    8,741
    Ratings:
    +12,821
    Religion:
    Irreligious Agnostic Atheistic Apatheist
    To me sexism in most countries comes from the same place. Gender roles at large but specifically the disdain of the feminine. Since I don't equate feminine with women, and think feminine should be a quality given due by all genders for mental and physical wellbeing, I think anti-femininity damages all people.

    Femininity is considered weakness in many cultures. Something masculinity is 'supposed' to exploit. So if you have the qualities considered feminine in that culture, emotional awareness, introspection, nurturing, empathy, etc, you tend to get power and agency stripped from you. This stripping of power from feminine and hoarding it under masculine is what I see as toxic masculinity. Which is a perspective men, women, nonbinary or agender can buy into.

    Lost a custody case as a man? It's because men are seen as not 'supposed to be' as essential to nurturing kids as women, because femininity is considered a weakness for men.

    Men get abused for crying? Crying is feminine, therefore weak. Men aren't supposed to be weak.

    Men get assaulted by a woman? Men are supposed to be strong. Men who aren't strong are effeminate. That's bad. It's weak to admit weakness. Keep quiet about it.

    All these things are toxic beliefs where the thing being reviled is femininity.
     
    • Like Like x 5
  6. Jaiket

    Jaiket Well-Known Member
    Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2004
    Messages:
    8,850
    Ratings:
    +2,441
    Religion:
    Something else
    I have much the same view of things. It's damaging for men to think they have to be a particular way that very few of us are really comfortable with.

    (Part of the reason that I've really enjoyed the opening up to trans identities that I've seen in the last decade or so is that it helped me realise that I don't have to perform any gender role I'm not comfortable with. It's easier to be me in a world where other people have taken really big risks simply to live as themselves. I think a lot of men could benefit from not giving a damn whether other men or women find them manly enough.)
     
    • Winner Winner x 1
  7. Revoltingest

    Revoltingest I have the kavorka
    Premium Member

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2010
    Messages:
    189,577
    Ratings:
    +66,252
    Religion:
    Atheist
    Come here to tell us how unmanly you are.
    (It's a safe space. And fun.)
    How Unmanly Are You?
     
    • Like Like x 1
  8. JustGeorge

    JustGeorge Well-Known Member
    Staff Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2020
    Messages:
    3,273
    Ratings:
    +6,438
    Religion:
    Hindu
    I think sometimes pre-decided ideas of men can be dangerous. I've known men who were being abused by their wives or girlfriends who endured it because they didn't want others to know a woman was beating them up. We had a neighbor admit to being hit with frying pans by his girlfriend, and then try to laugh it off once he saw we didn't find it funny.
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
  9. Deidre

    Deidre Follow thy heart

    Joined:
    Dec 22, 2014
    Messages:
    6,988
    Ratings:
    +5,517
    Religion:
    Spiritual Christian
    I’ve noticed that when some men try to express their true feelings about something, it can often be met with scorn...because “boys don’t cry“, kind of thing.
     
    • Winner Winner x 1
  10. Brickjectivity

    Brickjectivity Veteran Member
    Staff Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2012
    Messages:
    32,341
    Ratings:
    +13,051
    Religion:
    liber-scripta grim Christian
    Its very common that if a man is friendly, is open, is emotional he alarms other men. This is a society where you don't hug other men, don't smile too much, don't express too much excitement. Other men will be concerned that a man is gay, and this is very difficult when gays are unpopular. They are currently. There is a kind of pressure to be macho, to be aloof, to be untouchable; and its is very widespread. That's my experience, and I'm nearing 50 years old.

    I remember back in the day when I was a teen passing out tracts to try to convert people that I encountered a man who wouldn't believe I was a virgin. He said that I absolutely must be gay. I think that was sexism.

    Going through life as a virgin I encountered this attitude in many places -- work places and schools, secular places, also among Christians of different denominations. People couldn't believe that a man could be chaste and not be gay. Along with it came some kind of excitement, like it was a novel thing for someone to not be sexually active. It was like they were meeting a talking dog. People would ask me about my sexual experiences and want to know, and I began to avoid those kinds of questions. I got tired of the same thing repeatedly.
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 2
  11. RayofLight

    RayofLight He/they

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2018
    Messages:
    3,947
    Ratings:
    +3,158
    Religion:
    Dark Pagan Witch looking into Left Handed paths
    Some of that can also be directed at asexual folk too. But it's definitely a stereotype that men are hornier then a three pecker billygoat.
     
  12. Brickjectivity

    Brickjectivity Veteran Member
    Staff Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2012
    Messages:
    32,341
    Ratings:
    +13,051
    Religion:
    liber-scripta grim Christian
    Not merely horny but also confused by our sex drive which changes our feelings, changes our thoughts and betrays us. We don't always know when attraction is affecting our thinking. It is like how gravity bends spacetime. Attraction bends the mind. So do lots of other things, such as anger or fear or sadness; but attraction is one of them.
     
  13. RayofLight

    RayofLight He/they

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2018
    Messages:
    3,947
    Ratings:
    +3,158
    Religion:
    Dark Pagan Witch looking into Left Handed paths
    Um I'm on the asexual spectrum(greyace) and hardly ever experience attraction and when I do it's mind usually not enough for me to want to act on it...is this another stereotype or a fact about how most folk experience attraction?
     
  14. Brickjectivity

    Brickjectivity Veteran Member
    Staff Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2012
    Messages:
    32,341
    Ratings:
    +13,051
    Religion:
    liber-scripta grim Christian
    Have you ever heard in a romance story one person say to another "I can't stop thinking about you." This actually happens, and I remember saying something like it before I had ever heard that other people did so. You may not experience this directly as an ace, however as a human you may find your thoughts affected by your feelings or by things that draw your attention. Human thoughts are a little bit bendy. We don't always notice what causes us to make our decisions. We can find ourselves, too, experiencing something like gravity and high sensitivity. I once seemed to have a directional sense of where a girl was, this one girl. It was like there was a compass in my brain, and I was drawn to where she was without even knowing she was there. I presume I knew subconsciously where she was by something I had heard or some clue, but to me it seemed like magic.
     
    • Informative Informative x 2
    • Useful Useful x 1
  15. RayofLight

    RayofLight He/they

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2018
    Messages:
    3,947
    Ratings:
    +3,158
    Religion:
    Dark Pagan Witch looking into Left Handed paths
    Ah ok.
     
  16. KAT-KAT

    KAT-KAT Veteran Member

    Joined:
    May 2, 2019
    Messages:
    11,955
    Ratings:
    +8,987
    Religion:
    Daughter of Shiva
    Yeah. I think men being not in control of their sex drive, is certainly a gross exaggeration. I have my hopes that when people say it, that they meant to say that women may have better control of their sex drives in general, and a less difficult time of it, due to the differences in hormones. But it's wrong in multiple ways. First of all, as a statement, it's wrong to say men can't control their drive. Second, even if it was true that women in general have better control over theirs, there's not too many situations where it's worth bringing it up, unless it's just to rub it in someone's face, and rubbing it in someone's face can be mean.
     
    • Informative Informative x 1
  17. Saint Frankenstein

    Saint Frankenstein On the funeral pyre of existence
    Premium Member

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2012
    Messages:
    34,136
    Ratings:
    +19,387
    That's passion or infatuation. That's a universal experience, not only a male one.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  18. Shaul

    Shaul Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 18, 2016
    Messages:
    4,157
    Ratings:
    +1,809
    Religion:
    Judaism
    I think health care is an area in which males are getting a raw deal. Consider some things. Males have a life expectancy about seven years less than females. The male mortality rate is higher than that of females in every age bracket. Yet (in the U.S.) the health care system spends twice(!) as much on care for females than on care for males. Just imagine what the outcry would be if these things were reversed!

    As an example, consider the many sources of breast, ovarian and cervical cancers research and treatment funding. While it is true that males do also get breast cancer, it is a type of cancer that primarily affects females. Now think how few sources fund research and treatment for prostate cancer. One difference is the gender of the victims. Society rushes to save females in their prime. Prostate cancer is a disease of “old men” who society isn’t quite as concerned about.

    Even though more males die from all types of cancer than females, funding for female specific cancer research and prevention is ten times that for male specific cancers. And that is just cancer. Other diseases that affect males more often are similarly funded less than those that affect females.
     
    • Like Like x 3
    • Useful Useful x 3
  19. Revoltingest

    Revoltingest I have the kavorka
    Premium Member

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2010
    Messages:
    189,577
    Ratings:
    +66,252
    Religion:
    Atheist
Loading...