Please don't touch!

[Mock Turtle]

Perhaps many are not aware that some people, for whatever reasons, do not like to be touched by others, even if there is no especial intent - just being friendly or grabbing their attention, for example. I found this out once and later discovered that the person was in fact autistic (which I had not worked out at the time), but I've since discovered that it occurs also in various other issues, like Asperger's or OCD, and it might be a phobia on its own (haphephobia). Anyone have such or had problems with it?

Don’t Touch Me! A Guide to Understanding Touch Aversion & Tactile Sensitivity

(I hope the choice of music isn't offensive - not intended as such.)

 

[ChristineM]

France and many other countries consider cheek kissing a form of welcome, being a Brit i found this quite intimidating when i first moved here. Now its just natural. I know some french people who cannot stand the custom and will physically push people away if they make the attempt.

Reasons, I don't know, it's one of the things that are not discussed on polite company.

 

[stvdv]

I found this out once and later discovered that the person was in fact autistic

Yes, some are quite sensitive when you come too close, I also found this out.

but I've since discovered that it occurs also in various other issues, like Asperger's or OCD, and it might be a phobia on its own (haphephobia)

Never thought of it. Thanks.

 

[Koldo]

France and many other countries consider cheek kissing a form of welcome, being a Brit i found this quite intimidating when i first moved here. Now its just natural. I know some french people who cannot stand the custom and will physically push people away if they make the attempt.

Reasons, I don't know, it's one of the things that are not discussed on polite company.

In Brazil, kissing cheeks is the standard custom when meeting someone in a casual setting... That is, as long as it is not a man kissing another man's cheeks.

 

[stvdv]

In Brazil, kissing cheeks is the standard custom when meeting someone in a casual setting

I did not know that. Also man kissing cheeks of another woman, when they are not in a relationship, or her husband is standing next to it?
I once kissed a woman on her cheek, but the North American man, who just married her, got really mad at me. Since then I stopped

That is, as long as it is not a man kissing another man's cheeks.

I think Muslims do this. But not the above. When not a Muslim, you better not even consider to do this. Some men get upset if you just look at them

 

[ChristineM]

In Brazil, kissing cheeks is the standard custom when meeting someone in a casual setting... That is, as long as it is not a man kissing another man's cheeks.

Man kissing mans cheeks is a regular sight here

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

I think Muslims do this. But not the above. When not a Muslim, you better not even consider to do this. Some men get upset if you just look at them

Men kissing and holding hands are common customs in Middle Eastern cultures. It's not associated with sexuality as it would be in the West.

Wanderlust: Arab greetings: the man kiss

 

[stvdv]

Men kissing and holding hands are common customs in Middle Eastern cultures. It's not associated with sexuality as it would be in the West.

How would that be, if 1 or both of the male kissers is homosexual in the Middle Eastern culture (did not come out of the closet yet)
So, it might be that gay kissing in the Middle East is associated with sexuality (when doing it); controlling mind is not always easy.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

How would that be, if 1 or both of the male kissers is homosexual in the Middle Eastern culture (did not come out of the closet yet)
So, it might be that gay kissing in the Middle East is associated with sexuality (when doing it); controlling mind is not always easy.

It's Western style gay identity they don't like. But kissing a guy on the cheek, holding his hand, etc. is common practice. They're not allowed to touch women they're not married to or related to, though. So that's only allowed between males. The Afghans still have a pederasty tradition dating back to Greco-Roman times, however. I read a graphic article on Vice years ago about how they would doll up a pretty looking guy, put him in a dress and bang him and that was seen as acceptable to blow off sexual steam to Afghan soldiers.

 

[stvdv]

Man kissing mans cheeks is a regular sight here

Yes, the French kissing "regular" being a fact, even reached us here in Holland. I thought it was mostly the straight French kissing though.

 

[stvdv]

I read a graphic article on Vice years ago about how they would doll up a pretty looking guy, put him in a dress and bang him and that was seen as acceptable to blow off sexual steam to Afghan soldiers.

But they did not have sex, or did they? Seems like abuse to me. I can't believe Koran/Islam sees this as acceptable.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

But they did not have sex, or did they? Seems like abuse to me. I can't believe Koran/Islam sees this as acceptable.

That's what "bang him" means. They gang banged him.

Found the article: Guns and Roses

The Qur'an doesn't really say much about homosexuality and doesn't give a punishment for it. Islam was more tolerant of male homosexuality than Christian countries were until the Europeans colonized Muslim countries and put anti-sodomy laws in place. They did the same in India and around the world.

 

[ChristineM]

Yes, the French kissing "regular" being a fact, even reached us here in Holland. I thought it was mostly the straight French kissing though.

It is straight, its just a friendly gesture like shaking hands

I can see where you get from. Its difficult to move here for tourists from Scandinavian countries. Takes an hour to drive a 20 minute journey, car parks (and camping sites) are crowded and around 6 cars in 10 have NL number plates. It must be like a ghost town near you ;-)

 

[Vinayaka]

France and many other countries consider cheek kissing a form of welcome, being a Brit i found this quite intimidating when i first moved here. Now its just natural. I know some french people who cannot stand the custom and will physically push people away if they make the attempt.

Reasons, I don't know, it's one of the things that are not discussed on polite company.

Mauritius for sure. It took me a month or so to feel at all okay about it ... but finally I convinced myself 'When in Rome ...."

 

[stvdv]

It is straight, its just a friendly gesture like shaking hands

I can see where you get from. Its difficult to move here for tourists from Scandinavian countries. Takes an hour to drive a 20 minute journey, car parks (and camping sites) are crowded and around 6 cars in 10 have NL number plates. It must be like a ghost town near you ;-)

Aha, that's why there are only 1000 living in my village, they all are in France, searching to be "French kissed".

I was in France, 30 years ago, oh no, 40 years ago (I always forget that I am that old already). I was never kissed by men though. I remember I met a Scandinavian woman and she kissed like an angel; heavenly Scandinavian French kiss I could call that. I guess I was lucky, I just prefer women kissing me, not man.

 

[Nakosis]

Perhaps many are not aware that some people, for whatever reasons, do not like to be touched by others, even if there is no especial intent - just being friendly or grabbing their attention, for example. I found this out once and later discovered that the person was in fact autistic (which I had not worked out at the time), but I've since discovered that it occurs also in various other issues, like Asperger's or OCD, and it might be a phobia on its own (haphephobia). Anyone have such or had problems with it?

Don’t Touch Me! A Guide to Understanding Touch Aversion & Tactile Sensitivity

(I hope the choice of music isn't offensive - not intended as such.)

My mom never hugged me. No physical contact. Provided food shelter so I'm thankful for that.
Physical contact is uncomfortable for me. I assume this is partly why. I tolerate it because family seems to want it so I force myself into it. Fortunately I don't seemed to have passed this onto my kids.

 

[stvdv]

The Qur'an doesn't really say much about homosexuality and doesn't give a punishment for it.

Thanks, I did not know that. I found the same after googling. But gays need to repent, so that's a big punishment of itself, I would say.
Men having sex with each other should be punished, the Koran says, but it doesn't say how - and it adds that they should be left alone if they repent.

 

[stvdv]

Islam was more tolerant of male homosexuality than Christian countries were until the Europeans colonized Muslim countries and put anti-sodomy laws in place.

I did not know that either.

They did the same in India and around the world.

Christians created quite a bit of karma, doing all this sort of things I think. Now it "boomerangs" back to them, it seems.

 

[stvdv]

My mom never hugged me. No physical contact. Provided food shelter so I'm thankful for that.
Physical contact is uncomfortable for me. I assume this is partly why.

Similar with me. Although when I like a woman, then I like physical contact. But I am not the "hugging everyone" type of guy. I am not like Amma

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

Thanks, I did not know that. I found the same after googling. But gays need to repent, so that's a big punishment of itself, I would say.
Men having sex with each other should be punished, the Koran says, but it doesn't say how - and it adds that they should be left alone if they repent.

That's a terrible article. It doesn't even cite the Qur'an and then goes on to give Daesh's opinion as if they're some authority.

This is more informative: Homosexuality and transgenderism in the Quran - GALE