People who say they are happy

[Orbit]

There are people who say they are happy because everything has gone their way and their life is just as they want it to be. They have/had a successful career and a happy marriage and most of them raised children. They have had no real problems or struggles in life. Some of these people are still working but many are retired. Those who are retired planned for their retirement way ahead of time and everything is working out as they planned it. Most of them raised children and many have grandchildren and are now “doing” whatever they want to every day.

If this sounds like a fantasy, too good to be true, then obviously you are not one of these people.

These people might be happy but are these people really better off than those of us who have never had a stable life but have rather struggled all our lives and are still struggling day by day with no plans for the future and no way to know if this is ever going to change?

Please note that I am not referring to financial security. The happy people I described are financially secure but the ones who struggled and still do might also be financially secure, yet they have had other struggles and still do.

This is related to our ultimate purpose in life which is why I posted it here. I will leave to ponder how my question might be related to our ultimate purpose in life but I would appreciate your comments.

People who say they are happy don't necessarily have life histories absent of struggle. You can be struggling and be happy, though I was frankly miserable when struggling. Now that I don't have financial struggles, the other (medical) struggles are easier to manage. I would say I am happy now.

 

[Trailblazer]

There's nothing better than having your nose nuzzled in a furry tum (assuming this is permitted of course ).

No, nothing better, especially when they have as much fur as my Persians do!

 

[Trailblazer]

I can't believe you married him.

Sometimes neither can I.... but truth be told he is a cat lover too, but he is also a whiner so he complains when they mess up and he has to clean it. I don't usually complain, I just clean it up.

 

[Shadow Wolf]

You should be aware that no matter how well life treats you generally there are always bad times.

And those bad time can be more devastating when you are not used to dealing with them as a way of life.

And what is the ultimate purpose in life?

Its more when your life is just bad times. When you become so used to it that bad, adverse, and detrimental situations and people seem normal.

 

[Trailblazer]

You should be aware that no matter how well life treats you generally there are always bad times.

That's true, but for some people there is more bad than good and vice versa.

And those bad time can be more devastating when you are not used to dealing with them as a way of life.

That's true and I know that only too well.

And what is the ultimate purpose in life?

That depends upon what you believe. I have my beliefs, you have yours.

 

[ChristineM]

That's true, but for some people there is more bad than good and vice versa.

Of course but I was replying to your OP.

That depends upon what you believe. I have my beliefs, you have yours.

True

 

[Trailblazer]

People who say they are happy don't necessarily have life histories absent of struggle. You can be struggling and be happy, though I was frankly miserable when struggling. Now that I don't have financial struggles, the other (medical) struggles are easier to manage. I would say I am happy now.

That's true, people who say they are happy don't necessarily have life histories absent of struggle, but the people I was depicting in the OP don't have very many struggles, aside from the usual things that most people struggle with - earning a living, raising children, cars and house repairs, etc.

There was a time when I had financial struggles but that was a long time ago, now I have too much money. I never had any medical struggles so I have been lucky there. So now I have no financial or medical struggles. I have some struggles in my marriage but most of my struggles are related to the three houses we own and the tenant who lives in one of them!

 

[JustGeorge]

I don't usually complain, I just clean it up.

Seriously!!

So what, Quesa peed on the floor next to the stairs again. Why do we need to shout and holler and act shocked? Just grab the mop... it only takes a minute or two....

 

[Trailblazer]

Ultimately, happiness is psychological.... It is a state of mind because all thoughts and feelings are processed in the brain and mind. A person can be happy despite all their struggles or unhappy even if they have no struggles. What contributes to our states of mind is complex and it cannot always be changed by doing 1-2-3. How people cope with life's struggles and whether they are happy is resultant of nature (genetics) and nurture (upbringing and adult life experiences).

It bothers me when a believer says that it if only people were "more spiritual" then they would be happy no matter what is happening in their lives. This is a biased view of a believer who takes certain quotes that are in scriptures literally as if it is black and white. Just do x and you will have y. Real life is not that simple.

 

[Sheldon]

There are people who say they are happy because everything has gone their way and their life is just as they want it to be. They have/had a successful career and a happy marriage and most of them raised children. They have had no real problems or struggles in life. Some of these people are still working but many are retired. Those who are retired planned for their retirement way ahead of time and everything is working out as they planned it. Most of them raised children and many have grandchildren and are now “doing” whatever they want to every day.

If this sounds like a fantasy, too good to be true, then obviously you are not one of these people.

These people might be happy but are these people really better off than those of us who have never had a stable life but have rather struggled all our lives and are still struggling day by day with no plans for the future and no way to know if this is ever going to change?

Please note that I am not referring to financial security. The happy people I described are financially secure but the ones who struggled and still do might also be financially secure, yet they have had other struggles and still do.

This is related to our ultimate purpose in life which is why I posted it here. I will leave to ponder how my question might be related to our ultimate purpose in life but I would appreciate your comments.

You don't say what you mean by better off, only what you don't mean? Also your question is predicated on the unevidenced assumption that our lives have what you call an ultimate purpose. You need to explain what it is your assuming this is, and demsonrate some objective evidence for this assumption. Happy is a relative term in my experience.

 

[Firelight]

One has to learn how to be happy.
Perhaps this is something we don't teach so well.

How would it be taught? I’m not saying it can’t be, but I was wondering if you had methods in mind and who would be teaching it?

 

[Trailblazer]

Seriously!!

So what, Quesa peed on the floor next to the stairs again. Why do we need to shout and holler and act shocked? Just grab the mop... it only takes a minute or two....

An unidentified cat keeps peeing in the living room behind the rocking chair. We have dozens of 50 lb flattened bird food boxes that have a waterproof covering so I told my husband to put a flattened box behind the chair so it would not get on the carpet and it would be easy to just wipe it up. The worst is when they go outside of the litter box and it gets under the litter box and I have to clean the floor and the litter box, but I always take care of that...

 

[Shadow Wolf]

People who say they are happy don't necessarily have life histories absent of struggle. You can be struggling and be happy, though I was frankly miserable when struggling. Now that I don't have financial struggles, the other (medical) struggles are easier to manage. I would say I am happy now.

I too found the end of financial struggles and finally getting out if poverty did help considerably. The rest is still there, but at least my money concerns aren't a tjing anymore.

 

[JustGeorge]

An unidentified cat keeps peeing in the living room behind the rocking chair. We have dozens of 50 lb flattened bird food boxes that have a waterproof covering so I told my husband to put a flattened box behind the chair so it would not get on the carpet and it would be easy to just wipe it up. The worst is when they go outside of the litter box and it gets under the litter box and I have to clean the floor and the litter box, but I always take care of that...

That's creative! We don't have carpet. Not good for dogs, cats, or kids.

Quesa has been peeing in two spots in the living room at night since the bathroom has been torn up. I suspect its in response to lack of bathroom access(there was a litter box in there). She doesn't want to go all the way down to the basement. This will hopefully end when the bathroom is open for business for all species again.

 

[John53]

There are people who say they are happy because everything has gone their way and their life is just as they want it to be. They have/had a successful career and a happy marriage and most of them raised children. They have had no real problems or struggles in life. Some of these people are still working but many are retired. Those who are retired planned for their retirement way ahead of time and everything is working out as they planned it. Most of them raised children and many have grandchildren and are now “doing” whatever they want to every day.

If this sounds like a fantasy, too good to be true, then obviously you are not one of these people.

These people might be happy but are these people really better off than those of us who have never had a stable life but have rather struggled all our lives and are still struggling day by day with no plans for the future and no way to know if this is ever going to change?

Please note that I am not referring to financial security. The happy people I described are financially secure but the ones who struggled and still do might also be financially secure, yet they have had other struggles and still do.

This is related to our ultimate purpose in life which is why I posted it here. I will leave to ponder how my question might be related to our ultimate purpose in life but I would appreciate your comments.

I feel I've always been happy, lived a reasonably easy life in a good country and never gone hungry. The only time I struggled with depression was when I came out of the closet as an atheist because I knew it would alienate my family but I couldn't lie to myself any longer. I've had battles with health and still do but I wouldn't be dead for quids. I don't know the ultimate purpose of life, I doubt it even has one.

 

[Trailblazer]

You don't say what you mean by better off, only what you don't mean?

That was for you to ponder as I said in the OP. Forget the ultimate purpose, just think if these people are better off.

Also your question is predicated on the unevidenced assumption that our lives have what you call an ultimate purpose. You need to explain what it is your assuming this is, and demsonrate some objective evidence for this assumption.

I could explain what I think the ultimate purpose is but I am not going to give you the evidence you want, so why would I bother?

Happy is a relative term in my experience.

Studies show that most people are happy although some are happier than others but there is a smaller group of people who are not happy, and some of them are depressed.

My contention is that there is a group of people who are like I described in the first paragraph in my OP and this is based upon what people I know in real life and also on what people actually said when I posted other thread about lifestyles on this forum.

 

[Trailblazer]

That's creative! We don't have carpet. Not good for dogs, cats, or kids.

Quesa has been peeing in two spots in the living room at night since the bathroom has been torn up. I suspect its in response to lack of bathroom access(there was a litter box in there). She doesn't want to go all the way down to the basement. This will hopefully end when the bathroom is open for business for all species again.

As I think I told you before, most of this house was carpeted when we moved in and I was not up to removing all the carpet and replacing it with hard floors, so now most of the carpet is dirty and soiled and I cannot afford to care. I have most of it covered up with throw rugs so I cannot see how bad it looks!

 

[Nakosis]

How would it be taught? I’m not saying it can’t be, but I was wondering if you had methods in mind and who would be teaching it?

An easy way to be happy is to just start laughing. This action triggers the release of endorphins by your body.
How to Increase Your Endorphins

Emotions that you feel are just a chemical process within the body.
Generally we rely on external events to trigger these feelings we want.
However I find we have the ability to internally trigger these chemicals as well. Or the very least identify what in our environment triggers this release.

Watching funny cat videos is a good trigger for many. I read they are using VR games in surgery in the place of anesthesia which causes the brain to release chemicals which blocks the pain.

I think once we understand our feelings like happiness is the result of these chemicals being released it becomes a simple matter of learning how to trigger their release.

 

[Trailblazer]

I feel I've always been happy, lived a reasonably easy life in a good country and never gone hungry. The only time I struggled with depression was when I came out of the closet as an atheist because I knew it would alienate my family but I couldn't lie to myself any longer. I've had battles with health and still do but I wouldn't be dead for quids. I don't know the ultimate purpose of life, I doubt it even has one.

As I said in this post #29 I think happiness is psychological and related to many factors. It is a state of mind and not a state that can magically be changed. Some people are always happy even though they don't have anywhere near the amount of money or good health that I have. I think a lot of it is genetic because everyone in my family had depression and anxiety. Some of it is from our family upbringing but that cannot be changed either. Many things we are stuck with and we have to work around them.

 

[Sheldon]

That was for you to ponder as I said in the OP. Forget the ultimate purpose, just think if these people are better off.

Better off how?

I could explain what I think the ultimate purpose is but I am not going to give you the evidence you want, so why would I bother?

Then your question is meaningless sorry, even as a hypothetical.

Studies show that most people are happy

Citation for those studies please.

My contention is that there is a group of people who are like I described in the first paragraph in my OP and this is based upon what people I know in real life

This doesn't tell me much, since you won't define what you mean by better off, and the assumption you make about life having an ultimate purpose is not only completely unevidenced, you don't say what it is or how you claim to know it exists?

Happiness as I said is relative, money doesn't exist, it's an abstract idea, as are things like debt and credit, though they are useful ideas of course.