Masochism in belief

[Ellen Brown]

I can't get too specific because that will likely bring down the wrath of Hell.

A belief system or group that you are in constantly tells you that you are loved, and wonderful, yet they do a thing that hurts to you, and you say so and ask them to stop. They say what they are doing does not hurt you and keep doing it, as if they had a right and were entitled.

The members that you tell about this do not understand what you are saying.

Finally, you decide that you will not put up with being hurt by them and leave.

They act confused and hurt.

 

[Misunderstood]

I can't get too specific because that will likely bring down the wrath of Hell.

A belief system or group that you are in constantly tells you that you are loved, and wonderful, yet they do a thing that hurts to you, and you say so and ask them to stop. They say what they are doing does not hurt you and keep doing it, as if they had a right and were entitled.

The members that you tell about this do not understand what you are saying.

Finally, you decide that you will not put up with being hurt by them and leave.

They act confused and hurt.

I just want to make sure I understand, did you mean to say sadism? I thought masochism was the victim enjoyed the pain they were subjected to, whereas, sadism was someone who enjoyed inflicting pain on someone else?

 

[Rival]

I just want to make sure I understand, did you mean to say sadism? I thought masochism was the victim enjoyed the pain they were subjected to, whereas, sadism was someone who enjoyed inflicting pain on someone else?

This is right.

 

[Misunderstood]

To tell you the truth I feel that churches have the highest percentages of sadists, masochists and sadomasochists. Some feel they need to be punished for their sins and to refine their faith, others feel they are the disciplinarians and need to cleanse you of your sins. Then you have those who feel they need both to cleans your sins and to be punished for theirs.

As Christian's though, only God can forgive our sins if we sincerely ask for his forgiveness. And we are only to forgive those that sin against us, not to pass retribution on anyone; that is for God.

 

[Misunderstood]

This is right.

Thanks for confirming that Rival.

 

[Ellen Brown]

I just want to make sure I understand, did you mean to say sadism? I thought masochism was the victim enjoyed the pain they were subjected to, whereas, sadism was someone who enjoyed inflicting pain on someone else?

Yes, maybe that's the one.

 

[PureX]

I just want to make sure I understand, did you mean to say sadism? I thought masochism was the victim enjoyed the pain they were subjected to, whereas, sadism was someone who enjoyed inflicting pain on someone else?

Really, I think it's neither. What's being described is basically a dysfunctional family that does not understand or respect individual boundaries, nor how to experience and express love.

Once one of the members begins to recognize the dysfunction, their only way to seek health is to disengage with the family, since it's very unlikely that the rest of the members will recognize or acknowledge their own dysfunction, simultaneously.

 

[Dawnofhope]

I can't get too specific because that will likely bring down the wrath of Hell.

A belief system or group that you are in constantly tells you that you are loved, and wonderful, yet they do a thing that hurts to you, and you say so and ask them to stop. They say what they are doing does not hurt you and keep doing it, as if they had a right and were entitled.

The members that you tell about this do not understand what you are saying.

Finally, you decide that you will not put up with being hurt by them and leave.

They act confused and hurt.

An important part of having a faith is having a peer group with that Faith community where we feel a sense of belonging. Having a set of beliefs is one thing but having a community of like minded souls another.

 

[PureX]

An important part of having a faith is having a peer group with that Faith community where we feel a sense of belonging. Having a set of beliefs is one thing but having a community of like minded souls another.

Seems to me that if the people in this community really had faith, they would not need to surround themselves with like-minded people. In fact, they would not have to presume themselves to be particularly right-minded. Real faith is trusting in what one hopes to be true, not presuming to possess the righteousness truth.

 

[IndigoChild5559]

I can't get too specific because that will likely bring down the wrath of Hell.

A belief system or group that you are in constantly tells you that you are loved, and wonderful, yet they do a thing that hurts to you, and you say so and ask them to stop. They say what they are doing does not hurt you and keep doing it, as if they had a right and were entitled.

The members that you tell about this do not understand what you are saying.

Finally, you decide that you will not put up with being hurt by them and leave.

They act confused and hurt.

Most people do not have a well developed ability to walk in another person's moccasins. Their empathy is limited, and sometimes handicapped by strongly held beliefs. Especially when very young and immature (par for the course among teens, still common among young adults, less excuse for this among older adults).

And, this next part may not apply to you...
Sometimes hurt can be a complicated matter. There is immediate hurt, and there is long term hurt. A child is hurt if they can't play with their friend, but a long term hurt is avoided if said friend is a very bad influence. An addict is literally hurt if they go into withdrawl, but long term they are helped if they get off drugs. Sometimes a person is so fixated on their immediate needs that they cannot see that another has their best interests in mind.

 

[Remté]

This has nothing to do with faith unless we're talking about lack of it.

It sounds like abuse and manipulation.

Another less likely option is it is a minunderstanding.

It's difficult to point out the mistakes of someone who pretends to be a saint.

If one's mental stability endures it I would recommend confrontation before leaving. Though if it is manipulation this may lead to greater confusion and perhaps a greater emotional trauma.

If things don't change leaving is certainly a good idea and it is important to remember a victim of any kind of abuse is not reaponsible for it. So long as you take care to do right - you don't have anything to worry about so to speak. ..understandably enough something to think about.

Also if people commit to such behaviour with you they have done/do/would/will with someone else as well. Meaning they have something in them that causes them to seek for an opportunity to abuse.

The best way to try to prevent this kind of thing from happening might be to learn a kind of hardness against such situations and make it clear to anyone and everyone as soon as you get the bad vibes that you will not accept to be treated that way.