"What then shall we say, brothers and sisters? When you come together, each of you has a hymn,
or a word of instruction, a revelation, a tongue or an interpretation. Everything must be done so that the church may be built up." (I Corinthians 14:26)
Is this the way things are done in churches today? No.
Nobody is allowed to bring a revelation or word of instruction. If they do they are told they are out of line.
Everything they say is only allowed if it supports the creed of the congregation they are in.
Each group allows 1 interpretation and 1 revelation.
In Liberal churches however, the spirit is not so quenched. We believe God can move and teach. God is the guardian of truth, and circumcised are the guardians of Torah. The rest of us may receive revelations and interpretations.
There is not a need for a strict 'You must view things this way' culture.
I grasp what you are saying to me, and I deeply empathize. I have two siblings who each have had to bear the death of a child. I have no children, so its easier for me.
Nevertheless, the focus upon preparing for an afterlife is not the right way.
Its not a commitment to do good. It doesn't create humility. Its fear based living. Remember that to please God you must have faith, and you can't do that if you're living for the afterlife. Its entirely possible to do all kinds of good things out of fear and get no credit, just as its possible to say "Lord did I not do all kinds of things for you?" only to be rejected as someone who doesn't know what they are talking about. Not for you since you do not need it, but I will provide two references for others where Jesus talks about this: Matthew 25:32 (sheep and goats) and Matthew 13:30 (tares and wheat that look alike).
Medieval Life - Feudalism and the Feudal System - History
"Adam Smith used the term "feudal system" to describe a social and economic system defined by inherited social ranks, each of which possessed inherent social and economic privileges
and obligations. In such a system wealth derived from agriculture, which was arranged not according to market forces but on the basis of customary labour services owed by serfs to landowning nobles." --https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feudalism
"In Roman culture, it was common for a patron (a wealthy Roman citizen) to automatically retain his freed slaves in a dependent relationship, known as patronage. This required the client
to accompany his patron to war and protect him if the latter so wished, to accompany him to court as a vocal supporter and, if the patron held public office, to act as his assistant and to accompany him on representational events in public." --https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feudalism_in_the_Holy_Roman_Empire
Note the emphasis upon war in the culture. A man's life was mostly about being expendable, because that was required by the feudal system. Everything depended upon getting men to throw their lives away at a moment's notice.