Its hard to take scriptures serious with verses like these

[psychoslice]

Proverbs 21:19 (New Living Translation)
It is better to live alone in the desert than with a crabby, complaining wife.


There's the story of Isaac’s son, who smelled like a farm.
Genesis 27:27 (New International Version)
So he went to him and kissed him. When Isaac caught the smell of his clothes, he blessed him and said, "Ah, the smell of my son is like the smell of a field that the LORD has blessed.

2 Kings 2:23-24 (New International Version)
From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road some youths came out of the town and jeered at him. "Go on up, you baldhead!" they said. "Go on up, you baldhead!"

He turned around, and looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the Lord.

Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.

And the Qur'an.
Allah likes sneezing but hates yawning[edit]
Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, "Allah likes sneezing and dislikes yawning, so if someone sneezes and then praises Allah, then it is obligatory on every Muslim who heard him, to say: May Allah be merciful to you (Yar-hamuka-l-lah). But as regards yawning, it is from satan, so one must try one's best to stop it, if one says 'Ha' when yawning, satan will laugh at him."

The art of dealing with a fart[edit]
Narrated Ali ibn Talq: The Apostle of Allah (peace be upon him) said: When any of you breaks wind during the prayer, he should turn away and perform ablution and repeat the prayer.
Abu Dawud 1:205
Narrated 'Abbas bin Tamim: My uncle asked Allah's Apostle about a person who imagined to have passed wind during the prayer. Allah' Apostle replied: "He should not leave his prayers unless he hears sound or smells something."
Sahih Bukhari 1:4:139
Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, "Allah does not accept prayer of anyone of you if he does Hadath (passes wind) till he performs the ablution (anew)."
Sahih Bukhari 9:86:86
Narrated 'Abdullah bin Zam'a: The Prophet forbade laughing at a person who passes wind.
Sahih Bukhari 8:73:68
And Allah taught Adam all the names as follows: He taught him the name of everything, down to fart and little fart.
Tabari I 267.

These are only a very small number of unusual verses.............so, why do some take the scriptures literal with verses such as these ??.

 

[psychoslice]

14. Genesis 16:8

And he said “Hagar, Sarai’s slave girl, where have you come from and where are you going?” She answered, “I’m running away from Sarai, my mistress.” The angel of the Lord said to her, “Go back to your mistress and submit to ill treatment at her hands.”

 

[psychoslice]

12. Deut. 25:11

When two men are fighting and the wife of one of them intervenes to drag her husband clear of his opponent, if she puts out her hand and catches hold of the man by his privates, you must cut off her hand and show her no mercy.

MMm, what is going on here then ??.

 

[Timothy Bryce]

Of all the times I've heard people say "maybe you should read the bible" as some sort of solution to a moral dilemma, every time I think "what the hell good would that do?"

 

[psychoslice]

Of all the times I've heard people say "maybe you should read the bible" as some sort of solution to a moral dilemma, every time I think "what the hell good would that do?"

And of course that's true, it would only make one more confused than ever, that is if one thought for themselves, which I don't think many do. They imprison themselves chained to the words, they don't see past the words, as Paul said, "the letter killith".

 

[Notanumber]

This guy takes religion far too seriously.

 

[psychoslice]

Flag fixed behind the buttocks[edit]
It is narrated on the authority of Abu Sa'id that the Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) said: On the Day of Judgment there will be a flag fixed behind the buttocks of every person guilty of the breach of faith.
Sahih Muslim 19:4309

This guy takes religion far too seriously.

Ha, I have already seen that one, what a laugh lol.

 

[psychoslice]

I am not here to make fun of religion, but when you see verses like the above, well what can you honestly say, I myself try to find the best in all scriptures, but never to take them literal, if you do you get yourself in a knot that you will never get out of, and you will spend all your time trying to defend that which put you into a knot, undue that knot and be free to read your scriptures with intelligence, the very thing that was given to you.

 

[Kelly of the Phoenix]

I can't take Song of Solomon/Song of Songs very seriously: two people going on and on about how great they are in the sack is just ... it's none of my business.

 

[Shadow Wolf]

Of all the times I've heard people say "maybe you should read the bible" as some sort of solution to a moral dilemma, every time I think "what the hell good would that do?"

It is known for getting to people what it is that Christianity actually teaches and contains, and for getting them to leave it.

 

[George-ananda]

Its hard to take scriptures serious with verses like these

I think it is time to make 'scripture' out of the words of many modern teachers that we find spiritually advanced or inspired. 'Scripture' has too much been tied to the ancient.

 

[interminable]

Everything that u have written about Islam isn't from quran they are traditions that may be forged as we believe that first narrator is a liar

 

[omega2xx]

Proverbs 21:19 (New Living Translation)
It is better to live alone in the desert than with a crabby, complaining wife.

Not accurate but close enough. Being a woman, you cant know how truthful that is.

There's the story of Isaac’s son, who smelled like a farm.
Genesis 27:27 (New International Version)

So he went to him and kissed him. When Isaac caught the smell of his clothes, he blessed him and said, "Ah, the smell of my son is like the smell of a field that the LORD has blessed.

Not accurate, but close enough. Evidently you have never worked on a farm. It will cause you to sweat and smell like the field(not a farm). Like working in a bakery will make you smell like bread.


[/QUOTE]2 Kings 2:23-24 (New International Version)
From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road some youths came out of the town and jeered at him. "Go on up, you baldhead!" they said. "Go on up, you baldhead!"

He turned around, and looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the Lord.

Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.[/QUOTE]

Is that impossible?

And the Qur'an.
Allah likes sneezing but hates yawning[edit]
Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, "Allah likes sneezing and dislikes yawning, so if someone sneezes and then praises Allah, then it is obligatory on every Muslim who heard him, to say: May Allah be merciful to you (Yar-hamuka-l-lah). But as regards yawning, it is from satan, so one must try one's best to stop it, if one says 'Ha' when yawning, satan will laugh at him."

The art of dealing with a fart[edit]
Narrated Ali ibn Talq: The Apostle of Allah (peace be upon him) said: When any of you breaks wind during the prayer, he should turn away and perform ablution and repeat the prayer.
Abu Dawud 1:205
Narrated 'Abbas bin Tamim: My uncle asked Allah's Apostle about a person who imagined to have passed wind during the prayer. Allah' Apostle replied: "He should not leave his prayers unless he hears sound or smells something."
Sahih Bukhari 1:4:139
Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, "Allah does not accept prayer of anyone of you if he does Hadath (passes wind) till he performs the ablution (anew)."
Sahih Bukhari 9:86:86
Narrated 'Abdullah bin Zam'a: The Prophet forbade laughing at a person who passes wind.
Sahih Bukhari 8:73:68
And Allah taught Adam all the names as follows: He taught him the name of everything, down to fart and little fart.
Tabari I 267.

These are only a very small number of unusual verses.............so, why do some take the scriptures literal with verses such as these ??.[/QUOTE]

Do you have any evidence the ones in the Bible are not literal?

 

[psychoslice]

I think it is time to make 'scripture' out of the words of many modern teachers that we find spiritually advanced or inspired. 'Scripture' has too much been tied to the ancient.

Yes I totally agree, there are far better men and women who are far more switched on than any so called prophets from the dark past.

 

[psychoslice]

Not accurate but close enough. Being a woman, you cant know how truthful that is.



Not accurate, but close enough. Evidently you have never worked on a farm. It will cause you to sweat and smell like the field(not a farm). Like working in a bakery will make you smell like bread.

2 Kings 2:23-24 (New International Version)
From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road some youths came out of the town and jeered at him. "Go on up, you baldhead!" they said. "Go on up, you baldhead!"

He turned around, and looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the Lord.

Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.[/QUOTE]

Is that impossible?

And the Qur'an.
Allah likes sneezing but hates yawning[edit]
Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, "Allah likes sneezing and dislikes yawning, so if someone sneezes and then praises Allah, then it is obligatory on every Muslim who heard him, to say: May Allah be merciful to you (Yar-hamuka-l-lah). But as regards yawning, it is from satan, so one must try one's best to stop it, if one says 'Ha' when yawning, satan will laugh at him."

The art of dealing with a fart[edit]
Narrated Ali ibn Talq: The Apostle of Allah (peace be upon him) said: When any of you breaks wind during the prayer, he should turn away and perform ablution and repeat the prayer.
Abu Dawud 1:205
Narrated 'Abbas bin Tamim: My uncle asked Allah's Apostle about a person who imagined to have passed wind during the prayer. Allah' Apostle replied: "He should not leave his prayers unless he hears sound or smells something."
Sahih Bukhari 1:4:139
Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, "Allah does not accept prayer of anyone of you if he does Hadath (passes wind) till he performs the ablution (anew)."
Sahih Bukhari 9:86:86
Narrated 'Abdullah bin Zam'a: The Prophet forbade laughing at a person who passes wind.
Sahih Bukhari 8:73:68
And Allah taught Adam all the names as follows: He taught him the name of everything, down to fart and little fart.
Tabari I 267.

These are only a very small number of unusual verses.............so, why do some take the scriptures literal with verses such as these ??.[/QUOTE]

Do you have any evidence the ones in the Bible are not literal?[/QUOTE]
My evidence is commonsense, there are even more that makes no sense which I'll bring up soon, it does get one a good laugh though.

 

[omega2xx]

2 Kings 2:23-24 (New International Version)
From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road some youths came out of the town and jeered at him. "Go on up, you baldhead!" they said. "Go on up, you baldhead!"

He turned around, and looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the Lord.

Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.

Is that impossible?

And the Qur'an.
Allah likes sneezing but hates yawning[edit]
Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, "Allah likes sneezing and dislikes yawning, so if someone sneezes and then praises Allah, then it is obligatory on every Muslim who heard him, to say: May Allah be merciful to you (Yar-hamuka-l-lah). But as regards yawning, it is from satan, so one must try one's best to stop it, if one says 'Ha' when yawning, satan will laugh at him."

The art of dealing with a fart[edit]
Narrated Ali ibn Talq: The Apostle of Allah (peace be upon him) said: When any of you breaks wind during the prayer, he should turn away and perform ablution and repeat the prayer.
Abu Dawud 1:205
Narrated 'Abbas bin Tamim: My uncle asked Allah's Apostle about a person who imagined to have passed wind during the prayer. Allah' Apostle replied: "He should not leave his prayers unless he hears sound or smells something."
Sahih Bukhari 1:4:139
Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, "Allah does not accept prayer of anyone of you if he does Hadath (passes wind) till he performs the ablution (anew)."
Sahih Bukhari 9:86:86
Narrated 'Abdullah bin Zam'a: The Prophet forbade laughing at a person who passes wind.
Sahih Bukhari 8:73:68
And Allah taught Adam all the names as follows: He taught him the name of everything, down to fart and little fart.
Tabari I 267.

These are only a very small number of unusual verses.............so, why do some take the scriptures literal with verses such as these ??.[/QUOTE]

Do you have any evidence the ones in the Bible are not literal?[/QUOTE]
My evidence is commonsense, there are even more that makes no sense which I'll bring up soon, it does get one a good laugh though.[/QUOTE]

Not the ones you mentioned, but the Bible is full of figurative language.

I am amazed that some think the Bible is all literal. Teh figurative language teaches important spiritual truths. Anytime what the Bib le says seem impossible, it is probably presented in figurative or symbolic language.

 

[psychoslice]

Is that impossible?

And the Qur'an.
Allah likes sneezing but hates yawning[edit]
Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, "Allah likes sneezing and dislikes yawning, so if someone sneezes and then praises Allah, then it is obligatory on every Muslim who heard him, to say: May Allah be merciful to you (Yar-hamuka-l-lah). But as regards yawning, it is from satan, so one must try one's best to stop it, if one says 'Ha' when yawning, satan will laugh at him."

The art of dealing with a fart[edit]
Narrated Ali ibn Talq: The Apostle of Allah (peace be upon him) said: When any of you breaks wind during the prayer, he should turn away and perform ablution and repeat the prayer.
Abu Dawud 1:205
Narrated 'Abbas bin Tamim: My uncle asked Allah's Apostle about a person who imagined to have passed wind during the prayer. Allah' Apostle replied: "He should not leave his prayers unless he hears sound or smells something."
Sahih Bukhari 1:4:139
Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, "Allah does not accept prayer of anyone of you if he does Hadath (passes wind) till he performs the ablution (anew)."
Sahih Bukhari 9:86:86
Narrated 'Abdullah bin Zam'a: The Prophet forbade laughing at a person who passes wind.
Sahih Bukhari 8:73:68
And Allah taught Adam all the names as follows: He taught him the name of everything, down to fart and little fart.
Tabari I 267.

These are only a very small number of unusual verses.............so, why do some take the scriptures literal with verses such as these ??.

Do you have any evidence the ones in the Bible are not literal?[/QUOTE]
My evidence is commonsense, there are even more that makes no sense which I'll bring up soon, it does get one a good laugh though.[/QUOTE]

Not the ones you mentioned, but the Bible is full of figurative language.

I am amazed that some think the Bible is all literal. Teh figurative language teaches important spiritual truths. Anytime what the Bib le says seem impossible, it is probably presented in figurative or symbolic language.[/QUOTE]
Yes I'm glad you can see that, I myself take scripture as metaphorical, to take it literally is to miss the whole point, and of course there is a lot of stuff that should have never been there, well in my opinion.

 

[psychoslice]

. Literalism is incompatible with human nature.
People leave literalism behind the moment they start searching for the deeper meaning and significance of any text, says John Rumrich, an English professor at the University of Texas at Austin.

The human brain is naturally drawn to engaging in the interpretation of texts. Taking any text literally is incompatible with human nature because it forecloses thinking and leads to a confined state of mind.

“It’s like saying you can learn your alphabet, but not learn how to spell,” Rumrich said.

 

[omega2xx]

. Literalism is incompatible with human nature.

No it isn't. People want and need what is literally true, especially in their religion.

People leave literalism behind the moment they start searching for the deeper meaning and significance of any text, says John Rumrich, an English professor at the University of Texas at Austin.

He is partly right but to find spiritual truth we must look for it in figurative language. That doesn't mean we forget it. also all Biblical allegories are based on a literal, historical events. Both the literal and figurative gives us truths that comfort us.

The human brain is naturally drawn to engaging in the interpretation of texts. Taking any text literally is incompatible with human nature because it forecloses thinking and leads to a confined state of mind.

Only if you insist the Bible is only literal. God is love is literal. God loves you is literal. Jesus is teh bread of life is spiritually literal. Spiritual truth is literally true---You must be born again.

“It’s like saying you can learn your alphabet, but not learn how to spell,” Rumrich said.

While that is true, his point escapes me.

 

[psychoslice]

Some more verses from the bible by our loving god.

On Punishing ‘Immorality’

Leviticus 20:9

If anyone curses his father or mother, he must be put to death.
20:10 If a man commits adultery with another man’s wife—with the wife of his neighbor—both the adulterer and the adulteress must be put to death.
20:13 If a man lies with a man as one lies with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable. They must be put to death.
Deuteronomy 22:20-1 If, however, the charge is true and no proof of the girl’s virginity can be found, she shall be brought to the door of her father’s house and there the men of her town shall stone her to death. She has done a disgraceful thing in Israel by being promiscuous while still in her father’s house.
Exodus 35:2

For six days, work is to be done, but the seventh day shall be your holy day, a Sabbath of rest to the LORD. Whoever does any work on it must be put to death.