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I need some advice...

Discussion in 'Family and Personal Living' started by MJ Bailey, Jun 9, 2019.

  1. MJ Bailey

    MJ Bailey Member

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    I am currently married to a very abusive individual. I had been stalked several years ago and am not 100% sure if the person I married was the one who stalked me. In consideration of the way the person has treated me over the years and being I am aware of the mentality of stalkers through the study of criminal justice, I am lead to believe he is. I have received broken bones and had to literally fight for my life on more than one occasion. I have a family member who lives out of state and was offered to go there, but I am not sure if doing this would make me any safer. My family member works with an individual who's family member (of the opposite sex as I) will be visiting my state and they offered me a ride. My family member never met this person (neither have I) and the trip is several hundreds of miles. I will be alone with this person for the endurance of the trip and am not sure exactly what to do. Needless to say I am already a bit confused and have also reached out for help form professionals only to be ignored. Any logical advice would be highly appreciated.
     
  2. PureX

    PureX Veteran Member

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    It sounds like you want to go. Several hundred miles is only four hours or so, and if people on the other end know who is giving you the ride (make sure they do, name, make of car, license plate), and know when you are expected to arrive, I don't see any great opportunity for a problem. If you are not there at the appointed time, safe and sound, they can easily call the authorities for you, and with that much info the authorities will pursue it.

    Nothing changes if nothing changes. And change often takes courage. Good luck with it!
     
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  3. dybmh

    dybmh Well-Known Member
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  4. MJ Bailey

    MJ Bailey Member

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    Thank you very much for the advice PureX and for the information dybmh.
     
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  5. sun rise

    sun rise "Let there be peace and love among all"
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  6. Shadow Wolf

    Shadow Wolf Crazy Diamond

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    You should definitely seek some sort of professional help or help that is otherwise trained in and has access to resources for dealing with such things. We can offer a semblance of emotional support here (it's better than nothing but not as good as face-to-face), but what you're asking about isn't going to be best helped by asking random online strangers who likely and probably lack training, knowledge, and expertise.
     
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  7. sooda

    sooda Veteran Member

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    You're married to an abuser AND have a stalker? I am confused.
     
  8. MJ Bailey

    MJ Bailey Member

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    Very long story, but yes/ was married before my current marriage (they were friends and my current husband set me up with my last husband (go figure). After having difficulties with my first husband yes I had a stalker. My question to you soda is why is it so confusing to be married and have a stalker? To me it is obvious this discussion is without your realm of realization. Before I was married to my first husband I had very good opportunity, one of which I could allow my child to know their father or take a job that the child's father would relinquish himself from the child's life. If you have ever had someone outside your home banging on buildings and shooting guns to the point of which neighbors are actually willing to sit outside your home with their own firearm to assure you are ok, well yeah IMO I would call that problematic
     
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