As a carry over from the death anxiety thread. Is fear of something a learned behaviour (particularly of death) or an innate one? Is it both? Is there a 3rd side that I am missing here? What are your thoughts?
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I would argue that people generally don't fear death. We fear things that might kills us, but only because they'd usually also cause pain and suffering and we fear the practical impact of death on others, the grief and financial impacts it can have.As a carry over from the death anxiety thread. Is fear of something a learned behaviour (particularly of death) or an innate one? Is it both? Is there a 3rd side that I am missing here? What are your thoughts?
To add an excerpt:
"Many adults will strive to protect children from the reality of death, and thus begins the descent into fear; a parent may unwittingly transfer their own insecurities or inability to articulate death to their offspring. But look to a child who has encountered death; they are far more accepting and resilient than we may imagine.
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So why do so many adults fear death so much, and why do many transfer this fear to children hidden under the veneer of "I know what's best for them, they shouldn't be subjected to death, they are too young" and similar remarks? They do so out of fear.
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We may assume that the fear of death is instinctive, a built-in device, but this is not necessarily the case, as the fear of death is not the same as the fear of dying.
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In the Western world, we have been taught to fear death. Death is bad, it separates us from the status quo, and it interrupts the flow of life; it causes us to feel emotions we can barely understand, let alone express. So the most effective way of dealing with it is to carry on regardless with a stiff upper lip and hope that it never returns to bite us on the backside. Invariably it does, and our relationship with death collapses into a heap of inappropriate coping mechanisms."
From "The Journey into Spirit: A Pagan's Perspective on Death, Dying, and Bereavement" by Kristoffer Hughes, who works as Her Majesty's Coroner in the United Kingdom for something around 3 decades.
This is good, I like this. I am going to see if any of my local Metaphysical stores carry a copy of this book. I was exposed to death at an early age (6) due to the passing of my Grandfather whom I was very close with. So I feel that I have always had a healthy relationship to the specter of death.
As a carry over from the death anxiety thread. Is fear of something a learned behaviour (particularly of death) or an innate one? Is it both? Is there a 3rd side that I am missing here? What are your thoughts?
If you haven't, @The Hammer , Kristoffer Hughes book on death and dying is written from a Pagan perspective and has some very good thoughts on this topic. His points that fear of death is learned is spot on, I think. He makes the observation that adults in our culture generally shelter children from the reality of death. This teaches them that death is something to fear in a very direct way.
I didn't have that experience growing up, and my parents didn't try to hide death from me. I'm glad for that, because I have a much healthier relationship with this inevitable process as a result.
It is natural to fear, but it is an emotion often exploited by others. I believe we are taught to fear, whether for ourselves or for those we love.As a carry over from the death anxiety thread. Is fear of something a learned behaviour (particularly of death) or an innate one? Is it both? Is there a 3rd side that I am missing here? What are your thoughts?
It's learned. I remember my mom freaking out about spiders and she reacted so suddenly that it scared me too. To this day I am afraid of spiders.As a carry over from the death anxiety thread. Is fear of something a learned behaviour (particularly of death) or an innate one? Is it both? Is there a 3rd side that I am missing here? What are your thoughts?