Spirit of Light
Be who ever you want
Do not give an answer that the other person WANT`s to hear, Give the answer accordance with your understanding. If your understanding is not the answer the other person WANT`s to hear, it is not your fault.
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Do not give an answer that the other person WANT`s to hear, Give the answer accordance with your understanding. If your understanding is not the answer the other person WANT`s to hear, it is not your fault.
Why would it be different to say your understanding to your wife than to someone else?With the exception being when that other person happens to be your wife.
Why would it be different to say your understanding to your wife than to someone else?
Do not give an answer that the other person WANT`s to hear, Give the answer accordance with your understanding. If your understanding is not the answer the other person WANT`s to hear, it is not your fault.
Do not give an answer that the other person WANT`s to hear, Give the answer accordance with your understanding. If your understanding is not the answer the other person WANT`s to hear, it is not your fault.
It was not meant as it would the other persons fault But if someone disagree with you, it is ok because they have their understanding of the topic, but may see it from an other angle then you.Oh. I actually disagree with the last part, to tell you honestly. If someone doesn't accept what you say, it's not their fault (or yours), just a difference of opinion. Either we can accept it's neither person's fault or we can attempt to understand the other person's view. In other words, when we say it's the other person's fault it's putting ourselves in a "I am right" stance even when questioned the validity of one's "right" statement. We actually could be wrong-just our ego is preventing us to see that.
In my opinion, seeing others at fault for not accepting your point of view is putting a wall between your possible errors that you may be uncomfortable facing-especially from a stranger. Instead, maybe assess if the other person has a point, and also think about what you say and/or did that would make the other respond so-it could be the fault of both parties "or" it could be that both people find it hard to agree to disagree without one being right and the other wrong.
In other words, each person should be given the benefit and right to his or her own opinion regardless how we feel about their approach and opinion as such.
You-as in speaking to you about people in general rather than you personally.
It was not meant as it would the other persons fault But if someone disagree with you, it is ok because they have their understanding of the topic, but may see it from an other angle then you.
In your example of "if they do not accept what i say, it is on them" that would be a form of selfishness, so then it would be "wrong" tooI do get what you mean by the OP, though. If you said X and the other person does not accept it, in one respect it's their responsibility or fault in that (in my opinion) they have control over their own responses. On the other hand, it would not be their fault if they were given the benefit of the doubt they could be right or one can give them credit for their opinion.
In my opinion, when I read on RF "well, if they don't accept what I said, it's on them" type of thing, I read it as "I am right and they can't handle it." Instead, maybe more "they don't have to accept my opinion; and, that's okay."
Of course, I have problems doing this-but ideally, I think that's how it should be seen....it's not their fault they don't accept my opinion, it is their choice that they don't.
I might say the same thing with different wording to different people. Some people need different kinds of communication...
I have one friend I might say "You're doing something stupid."
To the other, I might "Are you sure that's really the best course of action?"
Sometimes if you don't communicate in a way the person easily understands or accepts, its not worth the trouble communicating at all, because they won't hear a thing you say.
Hmm. How do you approach this when talking to strangers (say on RF)?
We can make intelligent guesses on their method of communication, but then to try to figure it out would be kind of hard.
In your example of "if they do not accept what i say, it is on them" that would be a form of selfishness, so then it would be "wrong" too
If we say wrong or lack understanding of the topic in discussion, if we realize we said wrong and correct it, it means we gained wisdom about our self in this situation we never stop learningTrue. It's been said. Usually what I say (and wish to change) is that they accept what I say because I said X wrong or wasn't clear or so have you. It takes time to realize I do have a right to my own opinion regardless if the other person accepts it or not.
But yes, that way of putting it wouldn't be productive. Maybe it could be your fault (using you as a placeholder for those who may think similar to you) but it's hard for you to see that when someone is challenging the validity of your statement or maybe you feel it's unnecessary and uncomfortable to be a skeptic to validity of your opinion.
For me, it's hard to tell when it is my fault do to many extra factors, but in general, it's a catch-22. It could be your fault but maybe phrase it to where you take responsibility for your mistake not blame yourself for it.
If we say wrong or lack understanding of the topic in discussion, if we realize we said wrong and correct it, it means we gained wisdom about our self in this situation we never stop learning
Never crossed my mind to do thatDo not give an answer that the other person WANT`s to hear, Give the answer accordance with your understanding. If your understanding is not the answer the other person WANT`s to hear, it is not your fault.
Sometimes it's okay to give an answer that the other person would be comfortable with. Always being truthful can be risky, even when it's no fault of yours. Not everyone can handle truths especially when they have emotional connect to something.Do not give an answer that the other person WANT`s to hear, Give the answer accordance with your understanding. If your understanding is not the answer the other person WANT`s to hear, it is not your fault.