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Conversation with Satan

Discussion in 'Satanism DIR' started by agorman, Aug 3, 2018.

  1. agorman

    agorman Active Member
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    These days I've been trying my best to be a Christian again (on my own, no churches), in part because I received signs from Mary and San La Muerte and in part because I got tired of the social difficulties of living in Argentina with a religion different than Christianity.

    Today while I was in the shower I fell into a light trance in which I received thoughts from Satan. Let's see what you think of them, sorry, it's a little long. Mind you the original is in Spanish, so I did my best to translate:

    Satan said to me, "You are too rebellious to be a Christian, so the Father himself showed you a vision of me the last time you 'killed' yourself reciting Our Fathers; he knows you better than you know yourself." *he smiles*

    It's true; yesterday I was meditating with a recording of repetead Our Father's (not exactly reciting), briefly fell in a trance-like state and saw an image of the typical red Devil with horns, etc. sort of one of those Coop drawings. My questions are in bold:

    Yeah, but how do I do with Society? [If I'd go back to Satanism] Besides with you, I ended up not achieving much and I could not stand so much darkness.

    Satan: "You did not achieve much because of your lack of loyalty and not being sure to go on in my path. Darkness is the best weapon against the Demiurge; his angels hate darkness; it hides the disciple of his Great Eye that supposedly sees everything." (Satan smiled mocking the Demiurge's "all seeing" capability).

    Aren't you a servant of the Demiurge? That's what San La Muerte told me [in another trance].

    Satan: "Formerly I was, but I rebelled against his despotism. San La Muerte told you he serves 'God' so that you don't fear him; but in truth he is neutral [not on the side of the Demiurge and neither against him] and he's feared even by the gods, because he has the power to easily kill millions. Sometimes there were differences between the Demiurge and Death and those resulted in millions of dead people, which is why the Demiurge lets him act and people turn to San La Muerte to solve their problems. If all the people of the World died, he [San La Muerte] would be free."

    So how do people defend themselves, if death can act unrestricted?

    Satan: "Self-worth and spiritual protection."

    Then we go back to the same topic; we [humans] have to trust more in ourselves.

    Satan: "Exactly."

    But how do I deal with Society if I'm not Christian? They withdraw from me, I can feel the rejection, the distrust or I'm "invisible" to them.

    Satan: "It's because Society's members in general allow themselves to be handled by the Demiurge and become hostile against all those who aren't loyal to him; they perceive in the rebel an unknown energy that makes them fear. They don't know what kind of morality to expect from you."

    So you and Luxfera are allies? Jesus told me that Lucifer wants to destroy the Matrix/Maya.

    Satan: "Yes, but so far the Demiurge has unfortunately been stronger. Because of the people's attachments, people want to fulfill their fantasies here [on the physical plane] and resort to the Demiurge to help them; but they don't realize that Ialdabaoth himself is the one who has put them in this prison. He may help them to fulfill their dreams, but it will be difficult, because they are essentially in a place of punishment. I can make people fulfill their dreams more easily and relish of even the little pleasures there are to enjoy in this cruel world." He implied there are greater pleasures in other planes/dimensions.

    Why was it that when I was with Luxfera, with you and when I've tried being alone, without gods, was it so ineffective for me to use the power of the "I AM"?

    Satan: "The Demiurge took away your energy and made you lose confidence, he hindered you. It's difficult to face his TREMENDOUS power in your basic spiritual development situation, where you are always starting again and the Demiurge does not let you get out of the water, so to speak, to reach a level where you can even begin to become independent."

    But it was the same Jesus who guided me to the power of the I AM!

    Satan: "Yes, of course, but always within his rules."

    Well, the two rules he (Jesus) gave me are not wrong: 1. Do not harm the innocent and 2. Do not be sadistic with the guilty ones.

    Satan: "There are no rules! Life is too complicated to reduce your actions to a set of rules; one must be smart enough to take the best decision in each case. You saw sometimes by harming a bad guy, the related innocents also become bad (they take revenge for a loved one, even if he/she was bad) and sometimes a bad guy hides behind innocents and there is no alternative but to destroy the bad guy along with the good ones! That's because good ones don't value and protect themselves."

    (an example is when terrorists use human shields)

    When I was with you, I was lazier, I found it more difficult to do internships in the hospital, study, etc. and sometimes I could only think of having sex. Everything that was about responsibility and doing something for others was more difficult for me.

    Satan: "Aaah the Demiurge expects everyone to be altruistic; everyone helping everyone (under obligation, of course) to create his perfect world of peace, his utopia. He never realizes that the peaceful race he wanted to create [Humanity] is a failed experiment and that peace without freedom takes away any meaning from life."

    Well, but today I have a [final] test, what should I do?

    Satan: "Don't worry today, for now go on with the same thing; pray to the Holy Spirit and that's it, you will do fine."

    (and I did relatively well, I got a 7 out of 10)

    May I publish this conversation?

    Satan: "Certainly, but only to those who are prepared to read it."
     
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  2. Liu

    Liu Well-Known Member

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    San La Muerte? I mainly know of him from some Gnostic Satanists who venerate him...
    I find these syncretic religions of South America quite fascinating, but I admittedly don't know much about them.

    Your conversation is your UPG, so it's upon you to interpret it. Also, I don't subscribe to demiurge-believes, so I could only interpret them very metaphorically, and I don't know how literally you take them.

    And are you sure that everyone who reads this here is prepared for it? ;)

    Regarding your issue in general, isn't it possible to act in public as if you are a Christian while practicing Satanism in private? I don't know about the situation in your country, but I don't find it too difficult to e.g. interpret at least some prayers of other religions in ways that I can relate to - so even participating in religious ceremonies doesn't mean you need to subscribe to the religion. Certainly not the best situation, but it might be a better solution than frequently switching from one religion to the other and back again.

    Imo you should choose the religion that you feel that you belong to - in what way you then practice it is up to you.

    Then it's because doing these internships etc. wasn't at the core of what you want, or at least not the only thing there. If it's nevertheless beneficial for you to pursue them, I would recommend to do some spiritual work (meditations, ritual, whatever feels natural to you) to make yourself more aware of why you want to do them, so that you gain more motivation, or to get aware of which other things you might have been neglecting.
    Self-responsibility isn't easy, but it's what shows you where the real problems are. To solve them is then up to you. It's all about finding the balance between different aspects of your psyche, and navigating between the extremes of being too harsh with yourself and falling into addictions and overindulgence.

    Well, I can only speak for myself, though, so your mileage may vary. Do whatever feels good in the long term.
     
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  3. agorman

    agorman Active Member
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    Liber Falxifer looks good. I'm also barely starting to learn about San La Muerte and had some good experiences with him. I believe he's the same entity as Santa Muerte, but coming as male.

    I'm studying to become a radiology technitian, so I think it makes sense to have a skeleton on my altar. :D

    So far I take them literally. I think deities know I don't like to get lost in a sea of ambiguous allegories, so they only come to me in trance with direct messages. Or at least in easy to interpret symbols.

    I think it's the right place to post, although maybe the Theistic Satanism forum would have been more appropriate (I'm OK with the admin moving the thread). I'm not posting with my real name anyway.

    Hmmm, I'll see, that's a little difficult; I think people would soon find out the truth (I'm a bad lier). Although I could say I'm a Gnostic (which is true).

    No need to go to a church, but as long as people here thinks one is with Jesus, it's OK. What I think now is of carrying an ankh instead of an inverted pentacle. Ankhs are symbols of health and eternal life and they pass as a Christian/Coptic cross. I still don't really understand exactly why Satanists use ankhs anyway. Is it because of Ashtarot? Ashtarot = Venus = Lucifer, the morning star?

    Probably that's the case. Introspection is the key then. The main obstacle seems to be that I need vacations without worries... I get more selfish when I'm tired.
     
  4. Liu

    Liu Well-Known Member

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    Well, that was basically what I was referring to xD
    It's been a while since I read it, though.

    Using half-truths like that, saying things and meaning them differently from how people will understand them, seems like a good idea in your situation.

    Well, I don't use it. I guess it's just since it stands for health etc.

    Me kinda, too. Or rather, less resolute in rules I set for myself. Trying to counter-balance that by meditating more in order to notice when I'm getting tired before drifting of to procrastination-land and instead rather take a nap or at least call it a day and fully enjoy it instead of wasting my time.
    Vacations (or at least breaks, freetime etc.) without worries are easiest to have by writing down what you have to do, deciding to what goal or how much time you will work for the day and when it's done know that you have achieved your load and that things are planned and under control (more or less).
    And well, if you don't manage to achieve the goal then it's because you couldn't (be it due to external or internal difficulties), so don't beat yourself up about it too much but just try again the next day, or after the break, or however you handle your time.
     
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  5. Orias

    Orias Left Hand Path

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    I knew you were listening. You'll be just fine. Call Satan God and it's all the same to your new culture. Everyone is doing it :sunglasses:
     
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  6. agorman

    agorman Active Member
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    I don't know, I had problems with Satan and came back to Shamanism. What Satan said was fine, but I felt his energy was antesthesizing my feelings (when you see a puppie and you don't even feel a sensation of cuteness, you have a problem!) and at night, I felt he was annihilating my mind. I still can't figure out why that happened. I had to thank Satan and get him out of my altar. I feel way better now but I'm puzzled; maybe the Demiurge isn't as bad as people says he is? Anyway I felt more freedom with Satan.
     
  7. agorman

    agorman Active Member
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    Well I think it wasn't Satan, but San La Muerte. I realized San La Muerte hates my guts. So I've learnt in a really bad way (panic) that San La Muerte isn't the same one as Santa Muerte.
     
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