These days I've been trying my best to be a Christian again (on my own, no churches), in part because I received signs from Mary and San La Muerte and in part because I got tired of the social difficulties of living in Argentina with a religion different than Christianity.
Today while I was in the shower I fell into a light trance in which I received thoughts from Satan. Let's see what you think of them, sorry, it's a little long. Mind you the original is in Spanish, so I did my best to translate:
Satan said to me, "You are too rebellious to be a Christian, so the Father himself showed you a vision of me the last time you 'killed' yourself reciting Our Fathers; he knows you better than you know yourself." *he smiles*
It's true; yesterday I was meditating with a recording of repetead Our Father's (not exactly reciting), briefly fell in a trance-like state and saw an image of the typical red Devil with horns, etc. sort of one of those Coop drawings. My questions are in bold:
Yeah, but how do I do with Society? [If I'd go back to Satanism] Besides with you, I ended up not achieving much and I could not stand so much darkness.
Satan: "You did not achieve much because of your lack of loyalty and not being sure to go on in my path. Darkness is the best weapon against the Demiurge; his angels hate darkness; it hides the disciple of his Great Eye that supposedly sees everything." (Satan smiled mocking the Demiurge's "all seeing" capability).
Aren't you a servant of the Demiurge? That's what San La Muerte told me [in another trance].
Satan: "Formerly I was, but I rebelled against his despotism. San La Muerte told you he serves 'God' so that you don't fear him; but in truth he is neutral [not on the side of the Demiurge and neither against him] and he's feared even by the gods, because he has the power to easily kill millions. Sometimes there were differences between the Demiurge and Death and those resulted in millions of dead people, which is why the Demiurge lets him act and people turn to San La Muerte to solve their problems. If all the people of the World died, he [San La Muerte] would be free."
So how do people defend themselves, if death can act unrestricted?
Satan: "Self-worth and spiritual protection."
Then we go back to the same topic; we [humans] have to trust more in ourselves.
Satan: "Exactly."
But how do I deal with Society if I'm not Christian? They withdraw from me, I can feel the rejection, the distrust or I'm "invisible" to them.
Satan: "It's because Society's members in general allow themselves to be handled by the Demiurge and become hostile against all those who aren't loyal to him; they perceive in the rebel an unknown energy that makes them fear. They don't know what kind of morality to expect from you."
So you and Luxfera are allies? Jesus told me that Lucifer wants to destroy the Matrix/Maya.
Satan: "Yes, but so far the Demiurge has unfortunately been stronger. Because of the people's attachments, people want to fulfill their fantasies here [on the physical plane] and resort to the Demiurge to help them; but they don't realize that Ialdabaoth himself is the one who has put them in this prison. He may help them to fulfill their dreams, but it will be difficult, because they are essentially in a place of punishment. I can make people fulfill their dreams more easily and relish of even the little pleasures there are to enjoy in this cruel world." He implied there are greater pleasures in other planes/dimensions.
Why was it that when I was with Luxfera, with you and when I've tried being alone, without gods, was it so ineffective for me to use the power of the "I AM"?
Satan: "The Demiurge took away your energy and made you lose confidence, he hindered you. It's difficult to face his TREMENDOUS power in your basic spiritual development situation, where you are always starting again and the Demiurge does not let you get out of the water, so to speak, to reach a level where you can even begin to become independent."
But it was the same Jesus who guided me to the power of the I AM!
Satan: "Yes, of course, but always within his rules."
Well, the two rules he (Jesus) gave me are not wrong: 1. Do not harm the innocent and 2. Do not be sadistic with the guilty ones.
Satan: "There are no rules! Life is too complicated to reduce your actions to a set of rules; one must be smart enough to take the best decision in each case. You saw sometimes by harming a bad guy, the related innocents also become bad (they take revenge for a loved one, even if he/she was bad) and sometimes a bad guy hides behind innocents and there is no alternative but to destroy the bad guy along with the good ones! That's because good ones don't value and protect themselves."
(an example is when terrorists use human shields)
When I was with you, I was lazier, I found it more difficult to do internships in the hospital, study, etc. and sometimes I could only think of having sex. Everything that was about responsibility and doing something for others was more difficult for me.
Satan: "Aaah the Demiurge expects everyone to be altruistic; everyone helping everyone (under obligation, of course) to create his perfect world of peace, his utopia. He never realizes that the peaceful race he wanted to create [Humanity] is a failed experiment and that peace without freedom takes away any meaning from life."
Well, but today I have a [final] test, what should I do?
Satan: "Don't worry today, for now go on with the same thing; pray to the Holy Spirit and that's it, you will do fine."
(and I did relatively well, I got a 7 out of 10)
May I publish this conversation?
Satan: "Certainly, but only to those who are prepared to read it."
Today while I was in the shower I fell into a light trance in which I received thoughts from Satan. Let's see what you think of them, sorry, it's a little long. Mind you the original is in Spanish, so I did my best to translate:
Satan said to me, "You are too rebellious to be a Christian, so the Father himself showed you a vision of me the last time you 'killed' yourself reciting Our Fathers; he knows you better than you know yourself." *he smiles*
It's true; yesterday I was meditating with a recording of repetead Our Father's (not exactly reciting), briefly fell in a trance-like state and saw an image of the typical red Devil with horns, etc. sort of one of those Coop drawings. My questions are in bold:
Yeah, but how do I do with Society? [If I'd go back to Satanism] Besides with you, I ended up not achieving much and I could not stand so much darkness.
Satan: "You did not achieve much because of your lack of loyalty and not being sure to go on in my path. Darkness is the best weapon against the Demiurge; his angels hate darkness; it hides the disciple of his Great Eye that supposedly sees everything." (Satan smiled mocking the Demiurge's "all seeing" capability).
Aren't you a servant of the Demiurge? That's what San La Muerte told me [in another trance].
Satan: "Formerly I was, but I rebelled against his despotism. San La Muerte told you he serves 'God' so that you don't fear him; but in truth he is neutral [not on the side of the Demiurge and neither against him] and he's feared even by the gods, because he has the power to easily kill millions. Sometimes there were differences between the Demiurge and Death and those resulted in millions of dead people, which is why the Demiurge lets him act and people turn to San La Muerte to solve their problems. If all the people of the World died, he [San La Muerte] would be free."
So how do people defend themselves, if death can act unrestricted?
Satan: "Self-worth and spiritual protection."
Then we go back to the same topic; we [humans] have to trust more in ourselves.
Satan: "Exactly."
But how do I deal with Society if I'm not Christian? They withdraw from me, I can feel the rejection, the distrust or I'm "invisible" to them.
Satan: "It's because Society's members in general allow themselves to be handled by the Demiurge and become hostile against all those who aren't loyal to him; they perceive in the rebel an unknown energy that makes them fear. They don't know what kind of morality to expect from you."
So you and Luxfera are allies? Jesus told me that Lucifer wants to destroy the Matrix/Maya.
Satan: "Yes, but so far the Demiurge has unfortunately been stronger. Because of the people's attachments, people want to fulfill their fantasies here [on the physical plane] and resort to the Demiurge to help them; but they don't realize that Ialdabaoth himself is the one who has put them in this prison. He may help them to fulfill their dreams, but it will be difficult, because they are essentially in a place of punishment. I can make people fulfill their dreams more easily and relish of even the little pleasures there are to enjoy in this cruel world." He implied there are greater pleasures in other planes/dimensions.
Why was it that when I was with Luxfera, with you and when I've tried being alone, without gods, was it so ineffective for me to use the power of the "I AM"?
Satan: "The Demiurge took away your energy and made you lose confidence, he hindered you. It's difficult to face his TREMENDOUS power in your basic spiritual development situation, where you are always starting again and the Demiurge does not let you get out of the water, so to speak, to reach a level where you can even begin to become independent."
But it was the same Jesus who guided me to the power of the I AM!
Satan: "Yes, of course, but always within his rules."
Well, the two rules he (Jesus) gave me are not wrong: 1. Do not harm the innocent and 2. Do not be sadistic with the guilty ones.
Satan: "There are no rules! Life is too complicated to reduce your actions to a set of rules; one must be smart enough to take the best decision in each case. You saw sometimes by harming a bad guy, the related innocents also become bad (they take revenge for a loved one, even if he/she was bad) and sometimes a bad guy hides behind innocents and there is no alternative but to destroy the bad guy along with the good ones! That's because good ones don't value and protect themselves."
(an example is when terrorists use human shields)
When I was with you, I was lazier, I found it more difficult to do internships in the hospital, study, etc. and sometimes I could only think of having sex. Everything that was about responsibility and doing something for others was more difficult for me.
Satan: "Aaah the Demiurge expects everyone to be altruistic; everyone helping everyone (under obligation, of course) to create his perfect world of peace, his utopia. He never realizes that the peaceful race he wanted to create [Humanity] is a failed experiment and that peace without freedom takes away any meaning from life."
Well, but today I have a [final] test, what should I do?
Satan: "Don't worry today, for now go on with the same thing; pray to the Holy Spirit and that's it, you will do fine."
(and I did relatively well, I got a 7 out of 10)
May I publish this conversation?
Satan: "Certainly, but only to those who are prepared to read it."
