Thanks for sharing. I did not mean to exclude believers from this thread and I am glad you and some Christians showed up. It makes me realize that Baha’is are really on the same page as Christians when they present their arguments for God and Messengers.
I feel close to Christians in some respects, in other ways close to atheists. With Christians I share a love God, Jesus and the Holy Bible. With atheists I share a love for reason and science. Some Christians have a good balance between the two though. Some atheists are very spiritual. It’s great to love all people regardless of belief as Baha'u'llah has asked.
I do not know how one “tries out atheism” after they have been a believer.
I can however understand how someone can lose faith in God and then become an atheist. Often, my husband says I should just become an atheist, the way I sometimes talk about God, and I told him I wish I could become one but I cannot because I believe God exists. I suppose the main reason I believe that is because of Baha’u’llah, as I never even thought about God before I was a Baha’i. It is not as if I was searching for God or a religion. It just kind of found me. But God and I have never been on really good terms.
When I was 24 I became despondent with my search for the meaning of life. It had become my main preoccupation over the previous 3 years and eventually I decided there probably was no God. I decided that I should no longer pray as there was no one to pray to. This life was all there was. When you die you die. Not long after deciding to become an atheist, I made a series of poor decisions and soon crashed into a severe depressive episode. I’d never experienced anything like it before. Every waking moment was darkness. I couldn’t socialise, concentrate, think or do anything really. I thought I would whither away and die.
Eventually I turned my thoughts towards God again, was mindful of His presence in my life and would pray. Eventually my depression lifted. In my search for answers I asked God to guide me to a community of like minded people. I thought that would take me back to Christianity but it took me to the Baha’i Faith instead. I’d come across the Baha’i Faith early on my journey. This time I was ready to seriously investigate it.
After becoming a Baha’i I wondered what I should be doing with my life. That led me to study medicine and I felt called by God.
How does God make Himself known to people on a personal level? I am not saying it is impossible, I just have not experienced it myself.I understand when a Christian says that because of their beliefs, but I do not understand when a Baha’i says that. According to my understanding of what Baha’u’llah wrote, we cannot ever approach God or be partners with God, so I cannot buy this idea that we can have a “relationship” with God:
As Baha’is God asks us to recite an obligatory prayer daily and read from the writings morning and evening as well as a few other spiritual practices. This is to enable us to draw close to God, be inspired and be guided by Him.
So everyday I walk with God. It all really started 30 years ago after my failed foray into atheism. Through the Baha'i writings we should realise God has created as to know and worship Him, God is closer to us than our own life vein, and God is more friend to us, than we are to ourselves.
O SON OF SPIRIT! I created thee rich, why dost thou bring thyself down to poverty? Noble I made thee, wherewith dost thou abase thyself? Out of the essence of knowledge I gave thee being, why seekest thou enlightenment from anyone beside Me? Out of the clay of love I molded thee, how dost thou busy thyself with another? Turn thy sight unto thyself, that thou mayest find Me standing within thee, mighty, powerful and self-subsisting.
And now concerning thy reference to the existence of two Gods. Beware, beware, lest thou be led to join partners with the Lord, thy God. He is, and hath from everlasting been, one and alone, without peer or equal, eternal in the past, eternal in the future, detached from all things, ever-abiding, unchangeable, and self-subsisting. He hath assigned no associate unto Himself in His Kingdom, no counsellor to counsel Him, none to compare unto Him, none to rival His glory.” Gleanings From the Writings of Bahá’u’lláh, p. 192
This doesn't have anything to do with the personal relationship we all should have with God as we humbly walk with Him.
God is too far above humans to ever relate to us on a personal level. That is why we have Messengers. However, I think it is possible that God might be able to somehow communicate with our minds and I think maybe I have experienced that by way of getting guidance I asked for on certain matters.
Maybe God does communicate to everyone’s mind in some way and some people have the capacity to perceive Him better than others. Of course the same applies to recognizing His Messengers.
I believe prayers, reading of writings and living the life has a profound influence on our hearts and minds.