Oo, thought this would be fun. So let's see how accurate you were.
Speech clocked in at 1 hour 7 minutes, which is long by the average of Biden's SOTUs (the shortest of which clocked in at 1 hour, 1 minute, longest at 1 hour and 13 minutes), but quite long by the overall average standard and still shorter than a lot of Trump's (
1.2 Length of State of the Union Addresses in Minutes (from 1964) | The American Presidency Project).
My verdict:
The prediction is BODERLINE, as it's at least the second-longest of Biden's four speeches, but significantly shorter than most modern average speeches, even if significantly longer than a lot of past SOTUs.
2. Blame republicans for everything wrong and take personal credit for everything right
I think this was always a safe bet, really. Aside from a mention of "My Republican friends", which is fast becoming Biden's version of "I have black friends".
My verdict:
The prediction is TRUE.
3. Says no joke about 6 times
Looks like Biden's had a bit more public speaking training. Sadly, he failed to drop any catchphrases in this SOTU. He also failed to refer to anyone as "Jack".
My verdict:
The prediction is, sadly, FALSE.
4. Will say "extreme MAGA" 20 times
Big surprise here, as neither "extreme MAGA" nor "MAGA" were used even once! He
did refer to "Extreme gerrymandering" though, which is a new one we might want to look out for in future.
My verdict:
The prediction is FALSE.
5. Will call Trump a silly name trying to be tough
Another unfortunate omission from the SOTU. He did, however, refer to his "predecessor" around thirteen times, never referring him by name - either silly or accurate.
My verdict:
The prediction is - again, sadly - FALSE. Unless "My predecessor" becomes a funny meme. Can we make it a funny meme?
6. Says he is fighting for democracy about 150 times.
A slight over-estimation, but he still mentions democracy at least eleven times, many of those in the context of fighting for and/or defending it.
My verdict:
The predictions is TRUE. I mean, we can never really know if he was SUPPOSED to talk about defending democracy 150 times, specifically. Chances are he just forgot the additional 139, so I'll side with you on this one.
7. Has at least 3 unintelligible comments such as "The beer brewed here. It is used to make the brewed beer. During is define, oh, earth Rider. Thanks for the Great Lakes. I wonder why, ~ Biden
Unfortunately, I only have a text transcript that omits any mis-statements, so I would need this claim independent verified. Anybody got an "inane waffle-ometer" who wouldn't mind giving the speech a scan?
Overall, I would say your predictions were reasonable, but Biden - like a ninja - has come at us from a new and unexpected angle. Perhaps M. Night Shyamalan has been writing his speeches? That would also explain why his speech was far less entertaining that you predicted as well.
And yes, I am on the spectrum. How could you tell??