Let me change enlightened to a better phrase: awakened. Awakened is a state where you are more in tune with the universe, where you can see things more clearly and begin seeing things unclouded through the self. It is not dependent upon age at all. Enlightenment is also not dependent upon age. Nor are the two dependent upon one's success or failures.
A failed relationship is no reflection of the universe at odds with you or your faults spiritually. There are many reasons a relationship could fail. It is the union of individuals, and therefore it is subject to faults and decay.
The aura is loosely defined as bioelectric energy emitted by the body. It reflects one's emotions, physical health, spiritual strength, thoughts, disease, etc. The depth and color of the aura can show these attributes.
Aura wings are is a display of strong energy within the individual. Where the energy comes from is a bit harder to explain. I attribute it to an awakening. It could be physical, mental, or spiritual. Through refinement of these sources we grow, and experiencing and epiphany through one often leads to an awakening: a deeper connection to the universe.
A boost to all three aspects (body, mind, soul) increases the aura, and a decline can decreases it.
Some attribute winged messengers (christian or otherwise) as beings with such auras, not with actual wings, and the "halo" as being the crown chakra open, usually representing elightenment. Whether true or not is a personal opinion.
In some families of martial arts, students are taught about qi/ki/chi/chakra/spirit/whatever. These are within the body, but can be transferred outward, either by lack of control or control. Lack of control is in most, which is why we cannot perform martial feats ascribed to legendary warriors, but through learning to control, one can heal, kill, move objects, jump farther, all manner of feats. And often, not always, through the refinement of qi, an awakening can occur.
Through philosophy, the seeking of truth, one can also stumble upon awakenings.
Spiritually it happens when one's view and relationship to the permeating energy that IS, grows.