Unconditional Love

[Lightkeeper]

One Sunday while attending a Methodist Church, the minister asked the congregation, "What would Jesus think of you if he were here today?" I wanted to stand up and scream at her, "why don't you get it, you are a minister?"

It made me think about unconditional love. Does unconditional love "think" or "judge?"

 

[huajiro]

You will never understand "unconditional love" completely until you have children (I mean in general, not you Lightkeeper)

You are capable of giving and giving, and not caring what you get in return.

 

[Sunstone]

Of course unconditional love is not blind. We still think when we unconditionally love someone. But our thoughts are not judgemental. Rather they are accepting. Unconditional love does't try to change the other person, but to accept him or her as is. And I think in some respects it sees deeply into the character of a person.

 

[Scuba Pete]

Unconditional love does't try to change the other person,

I don't know that I buy this. Jesus accepted the prostitute AS SHE WAS. But then he told her to "Go and sin no more".

My unconditional love made me stop asking other women out on dates. There was a definite change in my habits.

My unconditional love makes me YELL at my son sometimes. It always moves me to reason with him and help him to understand his actions and the resultant consequences. Have I let my anger turn into sin??? Way too many times, and I can't take them back.

Agape Love is never free for either the giver or reciever. It demands sacrifices of time and possibly even your life. But it's always worth it. Even if you haven't perfected it quite yet.

 

[Sunstone]

I still don't think unconditional love seeks to change the other person, NetDoc. At least, it does not seek to fundamentally change that person, but rather accepts their fundamental character as is. At most it seeks to change the superficial nature of someone. I think that's compatible with Jesus telling the woman to go and sin no more. That he told her that implies that her sins were not fundamental to her character, but merely superficial to her character.

 

[Dr. Nosophoros]

I don't quite understand the reasoning for "unconditional love" or the urge to give it, IMO some people are not deserving of love. There are people in this world who will take and take and take from you and will keep taking from you until you have no more to give. Why waste your time and energy on people that do nothing but drain you (what is referred to as "psychic vampires") when you could be spending all that love and care on someone who actually deserves it?

Throwing energy away in the hopes that one might "get better" or that they might change, is one of the main reasons women stay with mentally/physically/emotionally abusive husbands- and that hope is the reason why some physically die at their hands. Whether they physically die or not is irrelevant, they have been killed or injured metally/emotionally, why put up with it?

If you have children, then yes, there is a certain give and take but then you yourself have taken on that responsibility, and the type of person they become is largely a result of your own doing and influence. Even then, when they reach adulthood if for some reason they become a "taker" with little care how it affects you, one shouldn't feel guilty if they feel the urge to "cut them-off" so to speak or actually do it. Just the fact of someone doing that may give them the wakeup call to change or they may just move on to the next "victim" to suck dry- it's up to them, but ultimately it's up to you what you allow happen to you.

 

[Sunstone]

Is anyone urging that we unconditionally love everyone, regardless of whether they deserve unconditional love or not?

 

[Scuba Pete]

That he told her that implies that her sins were not fundamental to her character, [/qupte] Actually, if you read the passage, it was obvious that "She was forgiven much". She had already repented and was washing Jesus' feet with a jar of perfume, her tears and her hair. She really understood Jesus' greater love for her, and that caused her to repent.

 

[anders]

"Unconditional love"? I find it difficult enough to understand or define "love". I haven't used that word for at least the last 15 years, in spite of having had a long and intense relationship in that time. Now, living alone, I find it appropriate for my relation to a former fiancée who left me in a way that I (of course) at that time found rather cruel and suddden. We now live some 300 miles apart, and have met only twice or thrice in the last 20 years, but still, she's the one I would like to share our last few (?) years with. I'd call that "love", transcending even any feelings towards the IPU (mhhhnbs), but "unconditional love" seems to me to be more of a psychiatric condition.

 

[Mustaphile]

Is anyone urging that we unconditionally love everyone, regardless of whether they deserve unconditional love or not?

I would. Whether anyone takes any notice of my urging though is another question.

 

[huajiro]

"Unconditional love"? I find it difficult enough to understand or define "love". I haven't used that word for at least the last 15 years, in spite of having had a long and intense relationship in that time. Now, living alone, I find it appropriate for my relation to a former fiancée who left me in a way that I (of course) at that time found rather cruel and suddden. We now live some 300 miles apart, and have met only twice or thrice in the last 20 years, but still, she's the one I would like to share our last few (?) years with. I'd call that "love", transcending even any feelings towards the IPU (mhhhnbs), but "unconditional love" seems to me to be more of a psychiatric condition.

Sounds both sad and beautiful Anders...here are some frubals for your pain

 

[Majikthise]

If you have children, then yes, there is a certain give and take but then you yourself have taken on that responsibility, and the type of person they become is largely a result of your own doing and influence. Even then, when they reach adulthood if for some reason they become a "taker" with little care how it affects you, one shouldn't feel guilty if they feel the urge to "cut them-off" so to speak or actually do it. Just the fact of someone doing that may give them the wakeup call to change or they may just move on to the next "victim" to suck dry- it's up to them, but ultimately it's up to you what you allow happen to you.

You are correct sir.I have a brother whois 54 and still leaches off my parents and no amount of talking to my father will make him stop supporting my brothers habit.My psycic vampire needs more juice in his sippy cup .I'll be back.:bonk:

 

[Lightkeeper]

I don't quite understand the reasoning for "unconditional love" or the urge to give it, IMO some people are not deserving of love. There are people in this world who will take and take and take from you and will keep taking from you until you have no more to give. Why waste your time and energy on people that do nothing but drain you (what is referred to as "psychic vampires") when you could be spending all that love and care on someone who actually deserves it?

Throwing energy away in the hopes that one might "get better" or that they might change, is one of the main reasons women stay with mentally/physically/emotionally abusive husbands- and that hope is the reason why some physically die at their hands. Whether they physically die or not is irrelevant, they have been killed or injured metally/emotionally, why put up with it?

If you have children, then yes, there is a certain give and take but then you yourself have taken on that responsibility, and the type of person they become is largely a result of your own doing and influence. Even then, when they reach adulthood if for some reason they become a "taker" with little care how it affects you, one shouldn't feel guilty if they feel the urge to "cut them-off" so to speak or actually do it. Just the fact of someone doing that may give them the wakeup call to change or they may just move on to the next "victim" to suck dry- it's up to them, but ultimately it's up to you what you allow happen to you.

I think part of unconditional love is recognizing the traits listed above within ourselves. When we can see ourselves in others and forgive them and us we are well on the road to unconditional love. If we have a strong reaction to someone it is probably because we don't recognize those traits in ourselves. That can apply to good or bad traits.

 

[No*s]

I think I would favor NetDoc. The term "unconditional" means that it occurs without condition. That, however, says nothing about whether it involves trying to change someone. Sometimes, that is a better expression of love than letting things be.

Quite simply, "unconditional love" will simply not stop loving, no matter what happens. It doesn't imply an absense of negative opinions or the lack of their expression.

 

[Jaymes]

You will never understand "unconditional love" completely until you have children (I mean in general, not you Lightkeeper)

That seems to be a rather cruel statement. What of the people who can't have or don't want to have kids? (I fall into the latter category)

 

[Scuba Pete]

I Corinthians 13:4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails.

 

[linwood]

That seems to be a rather cruel statement. What of the people who can't have or don't want to have kids? (I fall into the latter category)

Cruel it may be but I happen to agree with it.

In my own experience I have only known the condition with my children.
There is nothing they could do to make me stop or lessen my love for them.

I can`t say that about anyone else.

 

[Feathers in Hair]

I do unconditionally love everyone, though I'm not sure I would recommend that to everyone. I've never been a parent; that's just the way my heart seems to work.

It took me awhile to be able to accept unconditional love. I was convinced I wasn't deserving of it.

 

[kreeden]

Love is a concept that covers so much ... it is hard to define . Adding " unconditional " to it just makes it that much harder to define , I think . Just because Jesus told Mary to " sin no more " doesn't mean that if she did continue to sin , he would stop loving her , does it ? Does " unconditional love " last forever ? Ok , I think that it does , to a degree , but the question applies more to the " strenght " of that love .

Hell , I'm far from prefect , so I doubt that my concept of Love is prefect . But I can say that even never having children of my own , I have felt " unconditional love " as best as I can understand it .

 

[Lightkeeper]

I think it would mean you place no conditions on your love. You love without judging and expect nothing in return.