1 - Magot dung
The author's poem has set back Western Civilization and Literature by more than a decade, in the view of the critic. Authors of Magot dung are strongly encouraged to either take up a new hobby or get therapy in the form of many, many expensive workshops and retreats. This rating should never be given lightly.
2 - Ant Dust
Ant Dust has set back Western Civilization too, but only for less than a decade. Ant Dust has one, and only one, redeeming poetic quality to it. Maybe the poem is well titled, for instance.
3 - Mouse poo
Mouse poo is acceptable as a first effort by a brand new poet. It must have more than one redeeming quality to constitute mouse poo. But the poem lacks anything that would inspire (fertilize) other poets.
4 - Dog dung
With dog's dung we begin to approach real poetry. Dog's dung has three or more redeeming poetic qualities, but perhaps they are not sustained, nor possibly that significant. Dog's dung is still poor fertilizer, poor inspiration to most anyone.
5 - Pig's crap
Pig's crap is like dog's dung, but with something a bit clever about it. Kinda like a pig. You might actually envy a line of pig's crap, but only one line, one word, one conceit.
6 - horse manure
Good solid manure. The average poem. No one need ever be embarrassed to produce horse manure. Everyone but the very worse poets produce some horse manure. There is always something fertile in it, something that makes it worth reading at least once.
7 - moose poo
8 - Giraffe crap
9 - Bear scat
10 - Hippo poo
11 - Elephant dung
The beloved Elephant dung is awarded to poems that richly inspire us to write better poetry, use language better, express ourselves better.
12 - KING KONG DUNG
KING KONG'S DUNG must contain newly created words or phrases with the potential, at least, to change the English language in a good way. It is the stuff of legends.
Everyone feel free to fill in the blanks and elaborate on these descriptions!