Every year here in Schmoeville
In the first week of June,
When the Snobbirds return,
And the Smugberries bloom,
Every God-fearing Shmoe from all denominations,
Come from hither and yon and all other locations,
To gather together in the valley of Shmuuzya,
For a big celebration called.....
PompousPalooza!!
Oh what a grand and momentous affair!
Every Shmoe that you know would be sure to be there,
For they'd waited all year, both the young and the old,
And no Shmore would dare miss it, no not for his soul.
There'd be Shmolier Than Thouists, and Holy-ware Hawkers,
Piety-Peddlers and Talkbutno Walkers,
Shmoehova Halers and Funny-Tongue Shmoes,
(But no **edit* *edit**Shmoes, they would not invite "those")
And of course they expected the whole congregation,
From the First Church of Creative Verse Mutilation.
Yes there they would gather from far and from wide,
With their smugberry ciders and piety pies,
And confirm for each other, through feast and through fest,
That they were the Shmoes that the Lord loved the best.
And so the day came of the big Shmoe parade,
With an openning volley of prosly-tirades,
And some Biblio-babbles from Holy Joe Shmoe,
(who was widely considerred the Shmoe in the know),
And before the great feast was about to commence,
(which was carefully layed and at no small expence)
Reverend Holy Joe Shmoe with an air most impressing,
Elected himself to deliver the blessing;
"Lord"!, shouted Joe in a voice most sincere,
"I've no doubt that I'm speaking for everyone here,
When I say that we thank you for all that You've done,
---Oh, and please pass along our regards to your son,
For You've made us much greater than all of the rest;
More honest, more humble, more pure and more blessed,
Yes we're clearly the Shmoes who have rose through the ranks
We're the Shmoes that you choose, and for that we give thanks"!!
The valley erupted in thunderous cheers,
And a round of "Amen!"s that would deafen your ears,
And when finally there came a lull in the din,
The Shmoes all joined hands and took part in a hymn;
" God is for us, God is for us, "
No one else has his concern,
" God is for us, God is for us,
Let them go to hell and burn,
" We're elected, God says, God says,
You're rejected, God says, God says,
" We're the Father's favorite kids,
The rest of you can hit the skids"!
This chorus continued for several refrains,
Quicky Followed by hymns in a similar vein,
Such as, "Amazing Us" and "Up Here in the Air",
Then to "How Great We Art" and "The Overlord's Prayer",
And through all the applause, and through all the commotion,
Through all these displays of sincere self-devotion,
No one seemed to notice a wizened old Shmoe,
Who was all dressed in rags from his head to his toe,
As he wound through the crowd with a slow steady stride,
To the front of the table to pull Joe aside;
"Excuse me," he said in a voice barely heard,
"Pardon me sir, but might I have a word?
For I'd like to address them, I've something to say,
About everything that's gone on here today".
Joe looked him over with quiet distaste,
Then remembered the crowd and disguised it with haste,
As he turned to them all and with eager inflection,
Said, "Please everyone, may I have your attention?
"This poor wretched creature, this sorry old sot,
Has something to say, though I couldn't guess what,
But I say we should listen! Allow him to speak "!
Then he smiled to the crowd with his tongue in his cheek,
"For we're all of us, each of us, even this man,
Creations of God, and a part of His plan,
The morally upright as well as the weakling,
We're all of us His,
--in a manner of speaking"
Chuckles arose from a few of the Shmoes,
(although many just thought it was part of the show)
So they sneered and they leered at their unwelcome guest,
But they did so in silence to see what came next,
"I Thank you," the old fellow said with a nod,
"And agree that we're each of us children of God,
And we're all of us equal as sisters and brothers,
Though apparently some are more equal than others".
Now that the old fellow had their attention,
He paused for a bit and addressed the convention;
"I don't mean to disturb you, or disrupt your feast,
But I've something to say, and I'll try to be breif,
So please give me a moment, if no one objects,
For a small spelling error I'd like to correct;
"Now most Shmoes don't know this, but back in the day,
Of our forefather Shmoes, there was no letter "J",
And it's caused some confusion, and much discontent,
In regards to Himself, and the one that He sent,
The man He commisioned to issue His call
And give up his life for the good of the All,
"He called himself He'sUs,
--for He's Us, you see,
His real name was He's Us
--He's you ,
And He's me".
The crowd eyed the stranger with cold hard appraisal,
Amid many grumblings and much eyebrow raisal,
But despite the discomfort that swept through the throng,
With a soft steady manner the stranger went on;
"His real name was He's Us,
He's me and He's you,
And that's why He said that whatever you do,
For the least of my brethren,
You do it for me,
So live and let live,
And be and let be".
" 'Live and let live' "!?, Joe exclaimed with contempt,
"We're the Shmoes that He chose, so you see, we're excempt"!
For we've all been selected, hand picked from above,
To be His elected, His only beloved,
My sisters and my brothers are special, you see,
So we'll leave it to others to 'be and let be'"
The old fellow looked up at Joe with a sigh,
Then turned back to the crowd as he made his reply,
"No Shmoe is excempt, no Shmoe is above,
For we all have His Eye, and we all have His Love,
Every Shmoe that you know is your sister or brother,
So live and forgive and be good to each other".
"You're not listening"! said Joe, "For I've already said,
And I so wish that you'd get this into your head,
We're not like other Shmoes, we're the cream of the crop,
We're the creme dela creme, aye, the tip of the top,
And as everyone knows other Shmoes are beneath us,
So what could a Shmoe like yourself have to teach us?
With your wretched demeanor and raggedy clothes,
Do you think you're on par with the rest of us Shmoes?!
"Don't you see what we are? Can't you see what we do?
Do you dare to compare us to Shmoes such as you!?
"With your raggedy clothes and your wretched demeanor,
Can't you see that we're better?
---to say nothing of cleaner".
The crowd, in agreement, all shouted , "Amen"!
As the old fellow waited, then spoke once again,
"No Shmoe is above, no Shmoe is beneath,
In spite of their station, or face, or belief,
Every Shmoe that you know is your sister or brother,
So live and forgive and be good to each other"
Joe bit his lip in an ire of frustration,
Then he paced up and down in red-faced indignation;
As he stared and he glared at this ragged old man,
And right then and there ....
He came up with a plan...
**more down there vvv**
In the first week of June,
When the Snobbirds return,
And the Smugberries bloom,
Every God-fearing Shmoe from all denominations,
Come from hither and yon and all other locations,
To gather together in the valley of Shmuuzya,
For a big celebration called.....
PompousPalooza!!
Oh what a grand and momentous affair!
Every Shmoe that you know would be sure to be there,
For they'd waited all year, both the young and the old,
And no Shmore would dare miss it, no not for his soul.
There'd be Shmolier Than Thouists, and Holy-ware Hawkers,
Piety-Peddlers and Talkbutno Walkers,
Shmoehova Halers and Funny-Tongue Shmoes,
(But no **edit* *edit**Shmoes, they would not invite "those")
And of course they expected the whole congregation,
From the First Church of Creative Verse Mutilation.
Yes there they would gather from far and from wide,
With their smugberry ciders and piety pies,
And confirm for each other, through feast and through fest,
That they were the Shmoes that the Lord loved the best.
And so the day came of the big Shmoe parade,
With an openning volley of prosly-tirades,
And some Biblio-babbles from Holy Joe Shmoe,
(who was widely considerred the Shmoe in the know),
And before the great feast was about to commence,
(which was carefully layed and at no small expence)
Reverend Holy Joe Shmoe with an air most impressing,
Elected himself to deliver the blessing;
"Lord"!, shouted Joe in a voice most sincere,
"I've no doubt that I'm speaking for everyone here,
When I say that we thank you for all that You've done,
---Oh, and please pass along our regards to your son,
For You've made us much greater than all of the rest;
More honest, more humble, more pure and more blessed,
Yes we're clearly the Shmoes who have rose through the ranks
We're the Shmoes that you choose, and for that we give thanks"!!
The valley erupted in thunderous cheers,
And a round of "Amen!"s that would deafen your ears,
And when finally there came a lull in the din,
The Shmoes all joined hands and took part in a hymn;
" God is for us, God is for us, "
No one else has his concern,
" God is for us, God is for us,
Let them go to hell and burn,
" We're elected, God says, God says,
You're rejected, God says, God says,
" We're the Father's favorite kids,
The rest of you can hit the skids"!
This chorus continued for several refrains,
Quicky Followed by hymns in a similar vein,
Such as, "Amazing Us" and "Up Here in the Air",
Then to "How Great We Art" and "The Overlord's Prayer",
And through all the applause, and through all the commotion,
Through all these displays of sincere self-devotion,
No one seemed to notice a wizened old Shmoe,
Who was all dressed in rags from his head to his toe,
As he wound through the crowd with a slow steady stride,
To the front of the table to pull Joe aside;
"Excuse me," he said in a voice barely heard,
"Pardon me sir, but might I have a word?
For I'd like to address them, I've something to say,
About everything that's gone on here today".
Joe looked him over with quiet distaste,
Then remembered the crowd and disguised it with haste,
As he turned to them all and with eager inflection,
Said, "Please everyone, may I have your attention?
"This poor wretched creature, this sorry old sot,
Has something to say, though I couldn't guess what,
But I say we should listen! Allow him to speak "!
Then he smiled to the crowd with his tongue in his cheek,
"For we're all of us, each of us, even this man,
Creations of God, and a part of His plan,
The morally upright as well as the weakling,
We're all of us His,
--in a manner of speaking"
Chuckles arose from a few of the Shmoes,
(although many just thought it was part of the show)
So they sneered and they leered at their unwelcome guest,
But they did so in silence to see what came next,
"I Thank you," the old fellow said with a nod,
"And agree that we're each of us children of God,
And we're all of us equal as sisters and brothers,
Though apparently some are more equal than others".
Now that the old fellow had their attention,
He paused for a bit and addressed the convention;
"I don't mean to disturb you, or disrupt your feast,
But I've something to say, and I'll try to be breif,
So please give me a moment, if no one objects,
For a small spelling error I'd like to correct;
"Now most Shmoes don't know this, but back in the day,
Of our forefather Shmoes, there was no letter "J",
And it's caused some confusion, and much discontent,
In regards to Himself, and the one that He sent,
The man He commisioned to issue His call
And give up his life for the good of the All,
"He called himself He'sUs,
--for He's Us, you see,
His real name was He's Us
--He's you ,
And He's me".
The crowd eyed the stranger with cold hard appraisal,
Amid many grumblings and much eyebrow raisal,
But despite the discomfort that swept through the throng,
With a soft steady manner the stranger went on;
"His real name was He's Us,
He's me and He's you,
And that's why He said that whatever you do,
For the least of my brethren,
You do it for me,
So live and let live,
And be and let be".
" 'Live and let live' "!?, Joe exclaimed with contempt,
"We're the Shmoes that He chose, so you see, we're excempt"!
For we've all been selected, hand picked from above,
To be His elected, His only beloved,
My sisters and my brothers are special, you see,
So we'll leave it to others to 'be and let be'"
The old fellow looked up at Joe with a sigh,
Then turned back to the crowd as he made his reply,
"No Shmoe is excempt, no Shmoe is above,
For we all have His Eye, and we all have His Love,
Every Shmoe that you know is your sister or brother,
So live and forgive and be good to each other".
"You're not listening"! said Joe, "For I've already said,
And I so wish that you'd get this into your head,
We're not like other Shmoes, we're the cream of the crop,
We're the creme dela creme, aye, the tip of the top,
And as everyone knows other Shmoes are beneath us,
So what could a Shmoe like yourself have to teach us?
With your wretched demeanor and raggedy clothes,
Do you think you're on par with the rest of us Shmoes?!
"Don't you see what we are? Can't you see what we do?
Do you dare to compare us to Shmoes such as you!?
"With your raggedy clothes and your wretched demeanor,
Can't you see that we're better?
---to say nothing of cleaner".
The crowd, in agreement, all shouted , "Amen"!
As the old fellow waited, then spoke once again,
"No Shmoe is above, no Shmoe is beneath,
In spite of their station, or face, or belief,
Every Shmoe that you know is your sister or brother,
So live and forgive and be good to each other"
Joe bit his lip in an ire of frustration,
Then he paced up and down in red-faced indignation;
As he stared and he glared at this ragged old man,
And right then and there ....
He came up with a plan...
**more down there vvv**
Last edited: