Islam and Women : The Head Scarf

[.lava]

just stopping by to tell one more time covering face is not command of God

.

 

[England my lionheart]

Islam is a religion that puts a premium on purity. Purity of mind, body and soul. And anything that interferes with this purity (i.e. able to concentrate on God and worship Him and keep your priorities straight), Islam discourages, prohibits or tells you ways to go around such problems.

The main issue here is that Islam does not allow pre-marital conjugal relationships. The wisdom in this commandment is not, I think, lost on anyone. So, how to make sure this does not happen is what the entire issue is based on.

Now, this being the case, let us move onto Women. There is not difference between men and women is regards to their spiritual worth or reward from God. Each is judged equally based on their beliefs and actions in this world. That being said, onto the veil.

It is general knowledge that the more powerful a force, the more precaution must be taken to safeguard oneself from it. In the case of women, that force is the biological force of Sex. Extremely Powerful, to say the least. The force that ensures our continuation as a species would not be effective were it not so dominant in our psyche.

Now, Islam recognizes the power of sex, and instead of letting it run wild and run a man's life, provides means for him bring this force under control. For Islam wants to elevate a man from being a slave to his baser desires to loftier ideals goals. Firstly Islam tells men not to stare at women, nor freely mingle with them. This limits the chances of a man and woman being able to start a romantic relationship. Women are also told to wear the veil, to help facilitate this ordinance. The most attractive part of a woman is her hair. A bald woman is the biggest turn-off, and thus Islam tells woman to cover their hair when in public, so as not to tempt men and to help remind them of their duty to control their gazes.

This is the gist of the answer. The matter invariably turns to a question of women's rights and women should be allowed to wear what they want, men should control themselves, etc. Islam does not allow this. Islam acknowledges that a society can only work if everyone helps each other, and a pious society will only be able to stand if everyone works to help each other. The Quran says that believing men and women are friends of each other. Do friends devilishly tempt each other by displaying their charms to each other, tempting the other to break a commandment of God? No, friends help each other, facilitate ease for the other in reaching their goals, and a muslims goal is always to reach Allah. Sexual attraction to someone who is not "legal" for you in Islam (or halal) gives you no benefits. None. Instead, it merely causes you to burn on the inside, and incites you to sin.

I would say the overwhelming majority of Men can control their sexual desires and are not slavering sex maniacs,i have some very attractive female freinds and i have even been naked in a Play with one of them and i still see her as a freind.

 

[Meow Mix]

Boy am I glad to live somewhere that I can dress how I see fit. If men can't control themselves that's their problem; they need to grow up. I personally doubt anyone would seriously be that hoo-ha'd by seeing a woman anyway -- I mean, give me a break.

I've never once seen a person that was so attractive I became "distracted" in a significant way for more than two seconds. Are we in elementary school here?

Yes, it's true that some people in the West get unwanted pregnancies and STD's. That's because they're stupid and aren't responsible. Sexual freedom (like any freedom) carries responsibilities with it; and like all responsibilities there are consequences for ignoring them. There are a lot of idiots that ignore them, and they only end up hurting themselves. However, there are also a lot of mature people who use birth control, contraceptives, STD prevention (condoms, testing, knowing your partner).

 

[Sunstone]

I think it is no accident that the various practices of covering women up are everywhere in this world associated with reducing and controlling a woman's ability to choose a mate for herself.

 

[fullyveiled muslimah]

The concept of chastity including the hijab and all the things that accompany it as a Muslim has come to understand it, is a concept only a few non-muslims can actually grasp. The reason for that is that they have not grasped (or more apropos is flat refusal and rejection) the over-arching concept of submission to the will of Allah, even if it is against your own will. We can sit here all day and rationalize how dressing as scantily clad as your wardrobe will allow is a virtue in and of itself. I mean, there are very few things that an individual can't justify when it fits their desires, but this issue of hijab and of staying away from haram sexual contact, is one of iman. There is no other reason, although the benefits are many, for staying away from illicit sexual contact other than belief and submission to Allah. The threat of death via AIDS does nothing to stifle otherwise clear-thinking individuals from casual sex. It has no effect on people who would otherwise stand very clear of anything that threatened their life or well being. One night stands to long standing relationships abound, all without the attachment of marriage.

We have allowed casual sex to become the norm, so that marriage is seen as not only antiquated but devoid of any real meaning or benefit other than from maybe sharing health insurance or something. However, who can expect otherwise when the whole concept of worship to a God whether you call that god Allah or not, has been brought under such scrutiny and ridicule, that if you are a believer in any god other than your own power of reason and intellect you are to be disregarded as a fool anyway. So of course any allegiance to that god or adherence to any rules that go against modern day values and norms are dismissed out of hand as repressive/oppressive and the sooner they are done away with for good, the better off societies shall be.

Of course we know that humans are wonderful all on their own, and have no need of any law other than the law of the land, and we can pass other laws that fit what we wanna do when we get tired of those old laws that hold us back. We live in a time when my will shall be done, and my own personal desires are really all that matters and I have no social responsibility other than not to steal or kill, or become what we consider a dreg of society. In reality it is as Allah says, that the desires become god. The law of my desires is the ultimate law I will follow, and is the only submission I can see doing. There shall be no stifling of any of my desires be they wholesome or not, because I'm me.

So when we put forth the argument that one should obey Allah's commands because within those commands are benefits for us, even though they may not always be palatable, it falls on deaf ears many times. Allah is not even real let alone important enough for me to worship while He's busy dictating to me what I should do with my life.

OP, do you see where I'm going with this? Understand where I'm coming from?

 

[beenie]

^ again, hijab does not fix these problems, attitude does.
i can be equally modest with our without completely covering myself.

it's time for men to take responsibility for their own actions and grow the hell up. i'm not against hijab, but disagree with the idea that it will save women from the lewd stares of men. clothing doesn't save or cause anything. presentation does.

sure, a scantily clad woman may draw a few more looks, but just because you're not wearing a hijab...that doesn't make you scantily dressed either.

 

[fullyveiled muslimah]

I don't think there is a Muslim on this thread that feels that hijab is nothing more than clothing. Hijab is certainly a mindset, but when you say it is about presentation, what do you think clothes signify? The way I dress tells a lot about me. It doesn't tell the whole story but it starts you off. You perceive people differently depending on their cloths and demeanor.

Again this is not about men, this is about Allah and whether or not as a Muslim woman you would abide by even the law of hijab, whether you thought it meant you were a better Muslim for it or not. I don't think that clothes make you who are, but they can certainly reflect who you are or who you wish to portray yourself as. I am a Muslim woman who not only wears a headscarf but a face veil. The clothes don't make me Muslim, they don't make me pious, they don't make me evil or good, but they do reflect the fact that I choose to obey Allah's law. Even the one that is sometimes inconvenient. My clothes send a clear message that I am closed for the business of fornication and lewd sexual contact. When men see me, they do not see an easy sexual target and in fact many feel quite uneasy giving me much of a look in any case. People in general look at me with either interest or disgust. However, they don't look at me with a sexual interest, and if they do they do not make me aware of it.

It is blindness to assume that the way a person dresses does not affect the way we perceive them. A woman with full hijab and abaya on who is also acting modestly, will get a different type of attention than a woman with a tight pair of jeans and a halter top on. Even a woman who is dressed in a nice tunic and a long loose skirt on,and her hair is done nicely, and she looks well kept will attract the sexual attentions of someone. Even relationship experts or people with good common sense will tell you that what you wear says a lot about you. The tight jeans and halter girl will attract a different type of man and approach than the woman with the tunic and skirt. A woman with a long maxi dress and cute sandals gets a different type of reaction than a woman with a very short very tight mini dress on and 6 inch lucite stilettos.

 

[love]

Islam is a religion that puts a premium on purity. Purity of mind, body and soul. And anything that interferes with this purity (i.e. able to concentrate on God and worship Him and keep your priorities straight), Islam discourages, prohibits or tells you ways to go around such problems.

The main issue here is that Islam does not allow pre-marital conjugal relationships. The wisdom in this commandment is not, I think, lost on anyone. So, how to make sure this does not happen is what the entire issue is based on.

Now, this being the case, let us move onto Women. There is not difference between men and women is regards to their spiritual worth or reward from God. Each is judged equally based on their beliefs and actions in this world. That being said, onto the veil.

It is general knowledge that the more powerful a force, the more precaution must be taken to safeguard oneself from it. In the case of women, that force is the biological force of Sex. Extremely Powerful, to say the least. The force that ensures our continuation as a species would not be effective were it not so dominant in our psyche.

Now, Islam recognizes the power of sex, and instead of letting it run wild and run a man's life, provides means for him bring this force under control. For Islam wants to elevate a man from being a slave to his baser desires to loftier ideals goals. Firstly Islam tells men not to stare at women, nor freely mingle with them. This limits the chances of a man and woman being able to start a romantic relationship. Women are also told to wear the veil, to help facilitate this ordinance. The most attractive part of a woman is her hair. A bald woman is the biggest turn-off, and thus Islam tells woman to cover their hair when in public, so as not to tempt men and to help remind them of their duty to control their gazes.

This is the gist of the answer. The matter invariably turns to a question of women's rights and women should be allowed to wear what they want, men should control themselves, etc. Islam does not allow this. Islam acknowledges that a society can only work if everyone helps each other, and a pious society will only be able to stand if everyone works to help each other. The Quran says that believing men and women are friends of each other. Do friends devilishly tempt each other by displaying their charms to each other, tempting the other to break a commandment of God? No, friends help each other, facilitate ease for the other in reaching their goals, and a muslims goal is always to reach Allah. Sexual attraction to someone who is not "legal" for you in Islam (or halal) gives you no benefits. None. Instead, it merely causes you to burn on the inside, and incites you to sin.

Man I tell you, sex is a powerful force. I remember when I was about six or seven years old one of my uncles showed me an ink pen with a drawing of a full figured woman wearing a one piece bathing suit. When you turned the pen over the black ink drained away and exposed her bare breast and left only a small black triangle where her thighs met. By today's standards this would probably not make an Amish guy blush.
I must admit that from a very early age I was allured by the female mystique and charm.
By the eight grade around 1967 skirts had gotten much shorter and one of the most attractive girls in the class was sitting across the room from me and caught me looking up her skirt. And did the brazen hussy close her legs? Nooo. She spread her legs further so that I could see her panties. In the mean time while I was preoccupied the teacher called on me and I didn't hear him. I think there was only three of us in the room that knew was going on because the teacher asked me to stand up and the girl crossed her legs. Now at this point standing up was out of the question with the tent I had in my pants and I had to endure several threats as to what would happen to me if I did not stand up. And it was all her fault. If she had been covered with a blanket or was in a different room this would have never happened.
Bull! This gave me fantasy material for some time.
It was a great revelation when I discovered that women like sex too.
You must admit that ol' Mo liked his women too. But unlike him and many powerful men of some cultures I didn't try to hoard them (plural) covered up in seperate rooms away from the prying eyes of other horny **********

 

[Badran]

This is invaluable in teaching younger members of the community of the importance and use of the hijab, and provides another reason for the community to wear to hijab: social pressure. Not a bad thing, when the pressure is for the good of the people involved.

Also on a societal scale, seeing something as the norm of a society would discourage people from trying to go against it.

I agree with a lot of the points you've made, this one however, i don't find as a positive way to look at it.

To do something just to fit in, or follow the "norm" of society holds little to possibly no value at all, as it will be done for all the wrong reasons. The prime and most important point of this, is between the woman and God. This kind of decision should be coming 100% from the woman's sincere desire to do this, not at all to give in to any form of pressure.

That is of course, if i understood you correctly on what you meant by pressure. If not, please correct me.

 

[Badran]

Boy am I glad to live somewhere that I can dress how I see fit.

Muslim women can dress how they see fit too, what makes you think they can't?

Just because the religion promotes a certain dress, doesn't mean they have no choice.

The fact that in some cases, this is taken to a different level, a despicable one, where men sometimes influence the woman's choice in one way or another, doesn't mean thats what normally happens, or that this is the way it is with Muslim women all over the world.

 

[Meow Mix]

Muslim women can dress how they see fit too, what makes you think they can't?

Just because the religion promotes a certain dress, doesn't mean they have no choice.

The fact that in some cases, this is taken to a different level, a despicable one, where men sometimes influence the woman's choice in one way or another, doesn't mean thats what normally happens, or that this is the way it is with Muslim women all over the world.

So, can you tell me honestly that in predominantly Muslim areas women who don't dress in headdress/etc. are socially accepted -- they don't receive any social pressure that they're somehow socially inferior for not wearing it?

I find that hard to believe, but I've never lived in a predominantly Muslim area so I wouldn't know.

 

[Badran]

So, can you tell me honestly that in predominantly Muslim areas women who don't dress in headdress/etc. are socially accepted -- they don't receive any social pressure that they're somehow socially inferior for not wearing it?

I find that hard to believe, but I've never lived in a predominantly Muslim area so I wouldn't know.

You mean women who don't wear a headscarf?

Inferior or not socially accepted in general, no not at all.

However, in some families, in one way or another women who doesn't wear a headscarf would be faced by pressure, varying on its levels of course. In others, which are much much fewer, they would go ahead and force it on her. Finally in other families, that is entirely up to the woman.

In general, women not wearing a headscarf in my country is not as a big deal as you might get the impression. People in general are not all that religious to start with, even if they belong to a certain religion. Lots of women do not wear headscarfs, and do not face any kind of pressure from the society, while others would. Generally again, the kind of pressure usually posed to the women who experience it, thankfully is not enough to change her mind. As in, its might usually be just certain comments from family members and so on. But not in the sense that if a woman who doesn't wear a headscarf walks into a place, people would look at her strangely or something. Women not wearing headscarf is a very common sight that people are used to, and lots of them realize quite obviously that it doesn't speak negatively of her.

 

[love]

=control.[quoteto.win;2147947]Islam is a religion that puts a premium on purity. Purity of mind, body and soul. And anything that interferes with this purity (i.e. able to concentrate on God and worship Him and keep your priorities straight), Islam discourages, prohibits or tells you ways to go around such problems.

The main issue here is that Islam does not allow pre-marital conjugal relationships. The wisdom in this commandment is not, I think, lost on anyone. So, how to make sure this does not happen is what the entire issue is based on.

Now, this being the case, let us move onto Women. There is not difference between men and women is regards to their spiritual worth or reward from God. Each is judged equally based on their beliefs and actions in this world. That being said, onto the veil.

It is general knowledge that the more powerful a force, the more precaution must be taken to safeguard oneself from it. In the case of women, that force is the biological force of Sex. Extremely Powerful, to say the least. The force that ensures our continuation as a species would not be effective were it not so dominant in our psyche.

Now, Islam recognizes the power of sex, and instead of letting it run wild and run a man's life, provides means for him bring this force under control. For Islam wants to elevate a man from being a slave to his baser desires to loftier ideals goals. Firstly Islam tells men not to stare at women, nor freely mingle with them. This limits the chances of a man and woman being able to start a romantic relationship. Women are also told to wear the veil, to help facilitate this ordinance. The most attractive part of a woman is her hair. A bald woman is the biggest turn-off, and thus Islam tells woman to cover their hair when in public, so as not to tempt men and to help remind them of their duty to control their gazes.

This is the gist of the answer. The matter invariably turns to a question of women's rights and women should be allowed to wear what they want, men should control themselves, etc. Islam does not allow this. Islam acknowledges that a society can only work if everyone helps each other, and a pious society will only be able to stand if everyone works to help each other. The Quran says that believing men and women are friends of each other. Do friends devilishly tempt each other by displaying their charms to each other, tempting the other to break a commandment of God? No, friends help each other, facilitate ease for the other in reaching their goals, and a muslims goal is always to reach Allah. Sexual attraction to someone who is not "legal" for you in Islam (or halal) gives you no benefits. None. Instead, it merely causes you to burn on the inside, and incites you to sin.

[/quote]

Man I tell you, sex is a powerful force. I remember when I was about six or seven years old one of my uncles showed me an ink pen with a drawing of a full figured woman wearing a one piece bathing suit. When you turned the pen over the black ink drained away and exposed her bare breast and left only a small black triangle where her thighs met. By today's standards this would probably not make an Amish guy blush. I must admit that from a very early age I was allured by the female mystique and charm. By the eight grade around 1967 skirts had gotten much shorter and one of the most attractive girls in the class was sitting across the room from me and caught me looking up her skirt. And did the brazen hussy close her legs? Nooo. She spread her legs further so that I could see her panties. In the mean time while I was preoccupied the teacher called on me and I didn't hear him. I think there was only three of us in the room that knew was going on because the teacher asked
me to stand up and the girl crossed her legs. Now at this point standing up was out of the question with the tent I had in my pants and I had to endure several threats as to what would happen to me if I did not stand up. And it was all her fault. If she had been covered with a blanket or was in a different room this would have never happened. Bull! This gave me fantasy material for some time. It was a great revelation when I discovered that women like sex too. You must admit that ol' Mo liked his women too. But unlike him and many powerful men of some cultures I didn't try to hoard them (plural) covered up in seperate rooms away from the prying eyes of other horny b*st*rds.

 

[beenie]

I don't think there is a Muslim on this thread that feels that hijab is nothing more than clothing. Hijab is certainly a mindset, but when you say it is about presentation, what do you think clothes signify? The way I dress tells a lot about me. It doesn't tell the whole story but it starts you off. You perceive people differently depending on their cloths and demeanor.

Again this is not about men, this is about Allah and whether or not as a Muslim woman you would abide by even the law of hijab, whether you thought it meant you were a better Muslim for it or not. I don't think that clothes make you who are, but they can certainly reflect who you are or who you wish to portray yourself as. I am a Muslim woman who not only wears a headscarf but a face veil. The clothes don't make me Muslim, they don't make me pious, they don't make me evil or good, but they do reflect the fact that I choose to obey Allah's law. Even the one that is sometimes inconvenient. My clothes send a clear message that I am closed for the business of fornication and lewd sexual contact. When men see me, they do not see an easy sexual target and in fact many feel quite uneasy giving me much of a look in any case. People in general look at me with either interest or disgust. However, they don't look at me with a sexual interest, and if they do they do not make me aware of it.

It is blindness to assume that the way a person dresses does not affect the way we perceive them. A woman with full hijab and abaya on who is also acting modestly, will get a different type of attention than a woman with a tight pair of jeans and a halter top on. Even a woman who is dressed in a nice tunic and a long loose skirt on,and her hair is done nicely, and she looks well kept will attract the sexual attentions of someone. Even relationship experts or people with good common sense will tell you that what you wear says a lot about you. The tight jeans and halter girl will attract a different type of man and approach than the woman with the tunic and skirt. A woman with a long maxi dress and cute sandals gets a different type of reaction than a woman with a very short very tight mini dress on and 6 inch lucite stilettos.

in theory i understand what you are saying, but your undertones still lead me to believe that you believe that somehow a woman who completely veils herself is fulfilling her duty to Islam more than one who is not, and i respectfully disagree. i never said wearing hijab makes you a Muslim, because it certainly doesn't. however, i personally know many Muslim women who do not wear the hijab, yet have dedicated themselves to improving Islamic relationships via interfaith meetings, working with Greg Mortenson and the Central Asia Institute to educate young, poor GIRLS in Afghanistan and Pakistan...no, they don't wear the hijab, but their actions and deeds will not go unnoticed. perhaps they are doing a great good for our community.

i have the right to my opinion regarding covering, as do you.

i feel that if something was SO very important to Allah for us to follow without fail, He wouldn't have left it so vague. not once does the Qur'an specifically say "cover each and every strand of your hair". yet the Qur'an is extremely specific when it comes to inheritance, property laws, the rights of women, orphans, children, neighbors...

 

[beenie]

So, can you tell me honestly that in predominantly Muslim areas women who don't dress in headdress/etc. are socially accepted -- they don't receive any social pressure that they're somehow socially inferior for not wearing it?

I find that hard to believe, but I've never lived in a predominantly Muslim area so I wouldn't know.

You mean women who don't wear a headscarf?

Inferior or not socially accepted in general, no not at all.

However, in some families, in one way or another women who doesn't wear a headscarf would be faced by pressure, varying on its levels of course. In others, which are much much fewer, they would go ahead and force it on her. Finally in other families, that is entirely up to the woman.

In general, women not wearing a headscarf in my country is not as a big deal as you might get the impression. People in general are not all that religious to start with, even if they belong to a certain religion. Lots of women do not wear headscarfs, and do not face any kind of pressure from the society, while others would. Generally again, the kind of pressure usually posed to the women who experience it, thankfully is not enough to change her mind. As in, its might usually be just certain comments from family members and so on. But not in the sense that if a woman who doesn't wear a headscarf walks into a place, people would look at her strangely or something. Women not wearing headscarf is a very common sight that people are used to, and lots of them realize quite obviously that it doesn't speak negatively of her.

i agree with you mostly Badran, but i dare a Muslim woman to walk around Saudi Arabia and a few other select places (even northern Pakistan) without a hijab on.

 

[Badran]

in theory i understand what you are saying, but your undertones still lead me to believe that you believe that somehow a woman who completely veils herself is fulfilling her duty to Islam more than one who is not, and i respectfully disagree. i never said wearing hijab makes you a Muslim, because it certainly doesn't. however, i personally know many Muslim women who do not wear the hijab, yet have dedicated themselves to improving Islamic relationships via interfaith meetings, working with Greg Mortenson and the Central Asia Institute to educate young, poor GIRLS in Afghanistan and Pakistan...no, they don't wear the hijab, but their actions and deeds will not go unnoticed. perhaps they are doing a great good for our community.

i have the right to my opinion regarding covering, as do you.

i feel that if something was SO very important to Allah for us to follow without fail, He wouldn't have left it so vague. not once does the Qur'an specifically say "cover each and every strand of your hair". yet the Qur'an is extremely specific when it comes to inheritance, property laws, the rights of women, orphans, children, neighbors...

Women who don't wear a headscarf, are not in anyway, shape or form less good than those who do. Not to mention that it shouldn't be our concern in the first place who is better than who.

I quite realize you are at least much more inclined, if not completely convinced that hijab is not really a requirement. While i do think it is, i still agree with you that it should say nothing bad on the woman.

Hijab is for me, one of many things that a woman should do. So, just because i think its a requirement, doesn't mean that a woman not wearing it would come anyway near having her good deeds unnoticed, or be any less good. Like i said there are various things that Muslims should do, hijab is one of the things i believe women should do. Non of us do everything we should do, so naturally, a woman not wearing a hijab, is just like any other person.

Just wanted to add how i view it. I wanted to clarify that although i view it as a requirement, that still doesn't mean in anyway that women who don't wear headscarf, are in anyway less than those who do. One more thing, is that hijab as i understand is not the headscarf, its the entire idea of wearing modestly in a certain way. So i guess you mean the headscarf when you say you don't think its required, right? Just curious.

i agree with you mostly Badran, but i dare a Muslim woman to walk around Saudi Arabia and a few other select places (even northern Pakistan) without a hijab on.

I know, and thats very sad. And as you certainly know, that this is just another example of how these countries misrepresent the religion. I was speaking more in general, and using my country as an example.

 

[beenie]

Women who don't wear a headscarf, are not in anyway, shape or form less good than those who do. Not to mention that it shouldn't be our concern in the first place who is better than who.

I quite realize you are at least much more inclined, if not completely convinced that hijab is not really a requirement. While i do think it is, i still agree with you that it should say nothing bad on the woman.

Hijab is for me, one of many things that a woman should do. So, just because i think its a requirement, doesn't mean that a woman not wearing it would come anyway near having her good deeds unnoticed, or be any less good. Like i said there are various things that Muslims should do, hijab is one of the things i believe women should do. Non of us do everything we should do, so naturally, a woman not wearing a hijab, is just like any other person.

Just wanted to add how i view it. I wanted to clarify that although i view it as a requirement, that still doesn't mean in anyway that women who don't wear headscarf, are in anyway less than those who do. One more thing, is that hijab as i understand is not the headscarf, its the entire idea of wearing modestly in a certain way. So i guess you mean the headscarf when you say you don't think its required, right? Just curious.

sorry, yes. i mean the headscarf; i think the ruling on this is ambiguous and vague. i respect your take and opinion on the hijab/headscarf issue...i wish more people agreed with you. sadly, they don't.

i currently wear a headscarf (although probably not like others feel i should)...but i feel i put it on for the wrong reasons and am struggling with it every minute of every day. it's gotten to the point where it's interfering with other aspects of my life. my husband thinks like you; it's something i should do, but it doesn't make me "better"...we have daughters and he fears that i'd be confusing them to remove it. i think it can be handled ok if i discuss it with them first. anyway, i dress very modestly otherwise...i do wear jeans, etc. but i don't find them to be immodest in the least.

I know, and thats very sad. As you very well know, and certainly don't need me to tell you, that this is just another example of how these countries misrepresent the religion.

you're correct; i know we feel the exact same way about this.

 

[Badran]

sorry, yes. i mean the headscarf; i think the ruling on this is ambiguous and vague. i respect your take and opinion on the hijab/headscarf issue...i wish more people agreed with you. sadly, they don't.

A lot of people also think that a man who is good at the ritual parts, is naturally better than the one who is not, when in reality he most certainly isn't. It depends on what other things the other man do in his life, he could actually be many times better. And like i said, in the end, its not really our call to make who is exactly better than who. If i may, i suggest that you give little to no importance to the opinions of those stuck with such ideas.

i currently wear a headscarf (although probably not like others feel i should)...but i feel i put it on for the wrong reasons and am struggling with it every minute of every day. it's gotten to the point where it's interfering with other aspects of my life. my husband thinks like you; it's something i should do, but it doesn't make me "better"...we have daughters and he fears that i'd be confusing them to remove it. i think it can be handled ok if i discuss it with them first. anyway, i dress very modestly otherwise...i do wear jeans, etc. but i don't find them to be immodest in the least.

There is no reason why it shouldn't be handled okay i think, while of course it depends on how old they are and how to talk to them about it and so on.

If you are wearing it for the wrong reasons (the headscarf), and don't believe you should wear it, then you most certainly shouldn't wear it in my opinion. I would assume that you already tried to find information to make up your mind on the subject, and if this is your position right now, then you should do as you feel and wish.

 

[Sahar]

in theory i understand what you are saying, but your undertones still lead me to believe that you believe that somehow a woman who completely veils herself is fulfilling her duty to Islam more than one who is not, and i respectfully disagree. i never said wearing hijab makes you a Muslim, because it certainly doesn't. however, i personally know many Muslim women who do not wear the hijab, yet have dedicated themselves to improving Islamic relationships via interfaith meetings, working with Greg Mortenson and the Central Asia Institute to educate young, poor GIRLS in Afghanistan and Pakistan...no, they don't wear the hijab, but their actions and deeds will not go unnoticed. perhaps they are doing a great good for our community.

i have the right to my opinion regarding covering, as do you.

i feel that if something was SO very important to Allah for us to follow without fail, He wouldn't have left it so vague. not once does the Qur'an specifically say "cover each and every strand of your hair". yet the Qur'an is extremely specific when it comes to inheritance, property laws, the rights of women, orphans, children, neighbors...

Well, no body said that unveiled women are not capable of doing good yet they don't follow God's commands in this specific area and we pray for them. No inferior look but compassion and love for guidance and obedience of our Creator.
As for being "vague", as a matter of fact, the Qur'an gives the broad lines in most of the cases except in a few rulings. Not to forget that the Qur'an didn't give details about important pillars like Salah, Zakah...etc. Actually the Islamic Fiqh deals with very specific issues that you won't find in the Qur'an yet you will find the basic and broad lines for the rulings in it.
The thing is if the criteria for the modest dress weren't specified like it's in Islam, then we are certainly going to have various definitions of the modest dress. A girl that is used to be nude on the beach or in a club etc, might view the bikini as modest for example. If we canceled God's guidance from our view, everything will become relative. So the definition of the modest dress will be very subjective and relative as in my example. As other Muslims said, the modest dress is a part of our character and personality that reflects modesty and chastity. The inside naturally is reflected through our outside; how we talk, walk, what we wear, eat...etc.

I definitely enjoyed FVM's posts. Thanks for your wise posts.

 

[Sahar]

So, can you tell me honestly that in predominantly Muslim areas women who don't dress in headdress/etc. are socially accepted -- they don't receive any social pressure that they're somehow socially inferior for not wearing it?

I find that hard to believe, but I've never lived in a predominantly Muslim area so I wouldn't know.

It depends where you live and your social class. The case in Egypt is different from KSA from Tunisia...etc. I can speak about Egypt, there is kind of yeah social pressure to wear hijab in many cases but not really socially inferior because as Badran said, it's common. On the other hand there is also a social pressure not to wear hijab and the girl can face strong opposition from the family and friends in some cases. Very generally speaking, I can say wearing hijab is encouraged and considered as a good step.
I'd like to add there are some predominantly Muslim countries where veiled girls are actually banned from entering their schools, universities and maybe some governmental buildings, with the headscarf.