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Gay culture.

Unveiled Artist

Veteran Member
Is there such a thing? I didnt get the memo I was a part of gay culture or is it more of a movement of advocacy for gay rights and pride for being who we are not how people define us?

Gay imput would be nice. (Eh. Bad terms) Course open discussion.
 

Shadow Wolf

Certified People sTabber & Business Owner
I've always dismissed it as those who believe gays are effeminate men and butch women who must act differently because they are all outside of the gender norms.
Maybe it includes rocking out to Judas Priest and banging your head to Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody?
 

Saint Frankenstein

Here for the ride
Premium Member
I observe multiple gay cultures.....there is no single one.
Mmhmm. Butch/femme, leather daddies, bears/cubs/wolves/otters, lipstick lesbians, diesel dykes, straight acting, drag kings and queens, twink, etc. Then there's terms like top/bottom/versatile, poz, cruising, etc. There's even drugs specifically associated with gay men, like poppers.

To say there's not a gay culture is pretty ridiculous.
 

Unveiled Artist

Veteran Member
Mmhmm. Butch/femme, leather daddies, bears/cubs/wolves/otters, lipstick lesbians, diesel dykes, straight acting, drag kings and queens, twink, etc. Then there's terms like top/bottom/versatile, poz, cruising, etc. There's even drugs specifically associated with gay men, like poppers.

To say there's not a gay culture is pretty ridiculous.

No. Thats all stereotyping how people identify themselves supposed to be in a specific category (like the white/black bathroom)

Many gay cultures are based on ethnicity. You have african american lesbians standing upnfor their rights while you have gay feminiate men standing for their rights to be treated equally. I dont know if its a cultural but definitely political. No labels involved.
 

Saint Frankenstein

Here for the ride
Premium Member
No. Thats all stereotyping how people identify themselves supposed to be in a specific category (like the white/black bathroom)

Many gay cultures are based on ethnicity. You have african american lesbians standing upnfor their rights while you have gay feminiate men standing for their rights to be treated equally. I dont know if its a cultural but definitely political. No labels involved.
Um, no. Those are all terms that are used within the gay community. I take it that you have nothing to do with other lesbians or gay men? I'm really surprised that as a lesbian, you wouldn't know about the butch/femme scene, at least.
 

Unveiled Artist

Veteran Member
I can't define it anymore than I could define "white culture" or "women's culture".
African american has a distinct culture. I never heard white culture since I was born and raised in the states. Different ethnicities have culture. Deaf individuals have their own culture and some consider their heritage culture sub.

I kind found out about the gay culture almost recently.
 

Unveiled Artist

Veteran Member
Um, no. Those are all terms that are used within the gay community. I take it that you have nothing to do with other lesbians or gay men? I'm really surprised that as a lesbian, you wouldn't know about the butch/femme scene, at least.


Im not a label. I am a person. I cant speak for hundreds of people who say they are butch or femme. They are people. If there were no labels ans everyone were treated as equals not things then they may not need labels to define their behaviors. I seen straight men who are fem. Im a lesbian and I am not butch. My friend is lesbian, soft butch but she identifies as a married catholic woman with two beautiful children.

Im sure gay culture is beyond all those labels.
 

Saint Frankenstein

Here for the ride
Premium Member
Im not a label. I am a person. I cant speak for hundreds of people who say they are butch or femme. They are people. If there were no labels ans everyone were treated as equals not things then they may not need labels to define their behaviors. I seen straight men who are fem. Im a lesbian and I am not butch. My friend is lesbian, soft butch but she identifies as a married catholic woman with two beautiful children.

Im sure gay culture is beyond all those labels.
Gay culture created those labels. So I'm not sure what you're talking about.
 

Unveiled Artist

Veteran Member
Gay culture created those labels. So I'm not sure what you're talking about.

Why would gay people call themselves something they would be beatened up for.

Thats lile calling myself a ngga. We created the label, yeah...but spoken by the wrong person in the wrong area could get you klled.

I dont identify with any gay label. I find it degrating and sterotypical. I can be butch and straight. A man can be fem and straight.

But I never got the memo Im part of gay culture. If its all about creating labels to defined themselves separate from others its contradicting wanting to be equal. I mean, many lesbians are not fem or butch. They aee normal looking and acting people. Are they a part of gay culture? I dont know.
 

Saint Frankenstein

Here for the ride
Premium Member
Why would gay people call themselves something they would be beatened up for.

Thats lile calling myself a ngga. We created the label, yeah...but spoken by the wrong person in the wrong area could get you klled.

I dont identify with any gay label. I find it degrating and sterotypical. I can be butch and straight. A man can be fem and straight.

But I never got the memo Im part of gay culture. If its all about creating labels to defined themselves separate from others its contradicting wanting to be equal. I mean, many lesbians are not fem or butch. They aee normal looking and acting people. Are they a part of gay culture? I dont know.
If you don't personally identify with something, that's you. Other people do, however. There's many butch/femme sites, blogs, articles, etc. if you'd only look. Just because you, personally, aren't a part of something doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

Did you just recently come out or something? Because I was part of the gay and trans communities for about a decade.
 

Unveiled Artist

Veteran Member
If you don't personally identify with something, that's you. Other people do, however. There's many butch/femme sites, blogs, articles, etc. if you'd only look. Just because you, personally, aren't a part of something doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

Did you just recently come out or something? Because I was part of the gay and trans communities for about a decade.


Ive been out for 20 years. I didnt know I was different and had silly and derogatory names for me until I got the internet. I never knew I was a thing until I went christian way back when. Being gay, for me personally, has nothing to do with femme, butch,. Etc.

I wouldnt say gay culture is just about that. I also wouldnt call how people identify themselves as rediculous. Im fortunate to have loved two woman who loved me not because they "want to be with a femme" or have some type of gender roles, but be equal in a relarionship (would have been a marriage to my ex if i said yes).

I just find it strange. Just as people are saying the altered N word as if its cool. They created the labels. Im sure half the words have origins of spoken correctly.

I personally dont care for it. Some of us dont fit into those categories you listed. So gay culture has to be more than that.
 

Saint Frankenstein

Here for the ride
Premium Member
Ive been out for 20 years. I didnt know I was different and had silly and derogatory names for me until I got the internet. I never knew I was a thing until I went christian way back when. Being gay, for me personally, has nothing to do with femme, butch,. Etc.

I wouldnt say gay culture is just about that. I also wouldnt call how people identify themselves as rediculous. Im fortunate to have loved two woman who loved me not because they "want to be with a femme" or have some type of gender roles, but be equal in a relarionship (would have been a marriage to my ex if i said yes).

I just find it strange. Just as people are saying the altered N word as if its cool. They created the labels. Im sure half the words have origins of spoken correctly.

I personally dont care for it. Some of us dont fit into those categories you listed. So gay culture has to be more than that.
Oh. Well, those were just examples of different subcultures/scenes from the top of my head, anyway.
 

Underhill

Well-Known Member
True culture isn't about labels. It's behaviors intrinsic to, but not limited to, a group. Anywhere there is a strong community there are cultures. But being part of a group doesn't mean you adhere to all of, or any of, it's cultural activities.

I live in rural western NY. There is a strong redneck (for lack of a better term) culture here. I live here so I am immersed in it. But I certainly don't feel I fit the stereotypes. Now that I think about it, I do own chickens and have an old washing machine in the yard (a ringer washer my wife uses as a planter for flowers)...

Dangit ma, we're rednecks and I didn even knowd it!
 

Jainarayan

ॐ नमो भगवते वासुदेवाय
Staff member
Premium Member
Is there such a thing? I didnt get the memo I was a part of gay culture or is it more of a movement of advocacy for gay rights and pride for being who we are not how people define us?

I've known gay men who define their whole persona by their sexual orientation. That's how I'd describe the so-called "gay scene" or "gay culture". I have never done that... I'm just a man who happens to be sexually and emotionally attracted to other men. This is just my observation.
 

HonestJoe

Well-Known Member
Mmhmm. Butch/femme, leather daddies, bears/cubs/wolves/otters, lipstick lesbians, diesel dykes, straight acting, drag kings and queens, twink, etc. Then there's terms like top/bottom/versatile, poz, cruising, etc. There's even drugs specifically associated with gay men, like poppers.

To say there's not a gay culture is pretty ridiculous.
That doesn't prove the existence of a gay culture though. There will be millions of gay people who have absolutely nothing to do with any of those concepts and in many cases, loads of straight people who do.

I'm sure you could come up with lists of stereotypical terms defining your image of "youth culture", "black culture", "Christian culture" or "retiree culture" but that wouldn't mean any of them applied to all (or even most) the people in those groups nor would they accurately define a singular culture.
 

MysticSang'ha

Big Squishy Hugger
Premium Member
Is there such a thing? I didnt get the memo I was a part of gay culture or is it more of a movement of advocacy for gay rights and pride for being who we are not how people define us?

Gay imput would be nice. (Eh. Bad terms) Course open discussion.

I think gay culture was founded underground when being out would have made everyone vulnerable to the whims and the hostility of the dominant paradigm. Basically, anything heteronormative was the default culture, where deviatons from that norm meant being targeted for harassment/violence or being targeted for socio-economic exile. Hence, I think gay culture created their own rules within their own space. I know it was that way when I felt like being quasi-visible in an incubated space, in a way.

It's probably why many would talk about us as having an "alternative lifestyle." Even though that life was hardly a major part of my days or other peoples days. The majority of us were just living our lives, going to school, working with the public, buying food from the store, depositing money at the bank, pumping gas into our cars, renting an apartment, reading, dreaming, playing music....I mean, I could go on, but I think I'm belaboring my point.

The LGBTQ underground was there to imo allow us to have a safe space to be visible and to label ourselves something unrelated to cis straight people, and to label ourselves that wasn't derogatory from the heteronormative paradigm.

What did we do there in the underground? Oh gosh....sign up for book clubs at the alternative library? Stick around coffeehouses? Meet for dinner or lunch? And oh yes, go dancing at the clubs. We were sooooo dirty and seedy by doing these bad things.
 

Shadow Wolf

Certified People sTabber & Business Owner
What did we do there in the underground? Oh gosh....sign up for book clubs at the alternative library? Stick around coffeehouses? Meet for dinner or lunch? And oh yes, go dancing at the clubs. We were sooooo dirty and seedy by doing these bad things.
We did that glam/hair/makeup thing long before Twisted Sister and really said "we're not gonna take it anymore!" (Referring to the Stonewall Riot)
 
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